


rhythm of the rain keeps time

by tiffaniesblews



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Dreams and Nightmares, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Katara/Zuko (Avatar), F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Not Canon Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rated M for possible language, Slow Burn, and there was only one bed, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-15 21:28:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 71,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29071041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiffaniesblews/pseuds/tiffaniesblews
Summary: After finally confronting and killing her mother's killer, Katara must learn to start trusting Zuko once again.Except their plans to get back to their friends go awry when a rare thunderstorm hits the Fire Nation, causing Katara and Zuko to become separated from Appa. Together, they must make their way through the Fire Nation, even though Katara is still unsure of her feelings towards Zuko.As they continue their journey, Katara finds Zuko slowly opening up to her once again, confiding in her the deepest parts of his soul. Soon, Katara finds herself doing the same, baring her soul to Zuko even though the last time she had done so, he turned around and betrayed her. Leaning on each other, they learn to be vulnerable as they work to reunite with their friends.But is the road to recovery, or even home, ever easy?
Relationships: Katara/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 238
Kudos: 383





	1. make no apology

**Author's Note:**

> Summaries are hard.
> 
> Anyways, I've decided to age everyone up, making Katara 17 and Zuko 19 (thus, Aang and Toph 15, Sokka and Suki 18). And, yes, I had Katara kill Yon Rha. 
> 
> I also have 2 other WIPs here on AO3, but because I crave angst I decided to start another multichapter fic! Not sure how long this will be, but I have a rough outline made up. This has been rattling around my little goblin brain for WEEKS now and if I didn't finally start writing, I was going explode. 
> 
> I do not own A:TLA. Title of work comes from Fall Out Boy's "Jet Pack Blues".

Katara wasn’t really sure what she was expecting to happen to her once she finally confronted her mother’s killer. She was not expecting automatic closure, not expecting her mind and soul to heal as soon as her ice daggers plunged themselves deep into Yon Rha’s heart. Once she heard the satisfying _thud_ of his body hitting the mud, the _squelch_ of his blood as it mixed with the dirty water, Katara felt absolutely no remorse. He was sad and empty, and Katara felt nothing. 

As Zuko stood beside her, watching her with a mix of awe and fear, he kept his mouth shut. Instead, he stood tall, frozen in place as Katara went to Yon Rha’s body to inspect it, to feel his back to make sure that there was no more heartbeat coming from such a vile man. Killing Yon Rha made Katara no different than him, but he was evil, using the power he had over people for fear. Katara used her power to get rid of one last monster in the world. 

“He’s dead, Katara,” Zuko said finally, his voice so soft that Katara could barely hear him over the rain. 

“I have to be sure,” she replied stubbornly, flipping Yon Rha over and noticing the icicles already melting. Blood stained his already red tunic, turning it a deep maroon color and Katara could not help but feel a sense of satisfaction at the frozen fear in his eyes. Katara remembered when she used to dream about those eyes, cold and menacing to a _child_ who just wanted her mother. Now they will never see again, will never scare an innocent child into committing murder.

The rain pounded on the ground so loudly that Katara did not hear Zuko making his way over to her until he placed his hand gently on her shoulder. She’s tempted to shake it away, to tell him to _leave her alone_ , but she bit down on her tongue and continued staring down at the dead man in her arms. Slowly, she placed her palm over Yon Rha’s heart, letting the blood seep into her glove, feeling the warmth spread over her palm. Yon Rha’s eyes were glassy as they stared up at the sky, but he was not seeing. 

“Katara,” Zuko repeated, his grip tightening on her shoulder. “We should get going.”

Instead of fighting him, Katara nodded and dropped Yon Rha back on the ground, once again receiving a feeling of satisfaction when his body hit the ground. As Katara stood up, Zuko released his grip on her shoulder and took a step back, giving her room to move around. She held her hand out to the rain, letting the water mix with the blood on her hand, watching as it dripped down into the mud.

_Splish, splash, splish._

“We can leave him here,” she stated, turning to face Zuko. “He doesn’t deserve any mercy.”

“He had a quick death,” Zuko replied, looking down at Yon Rha’s body. “That was plenty of mercy if you ask me.”

“He didn’t deserve it then,” Katara retorted, pulling her mask back above her face so that Zuko could only see her eyes. “I should have drawn his death out, should have made him suffer.”

“Maybe,” Zuko shrugged, also pulling his mask up. “But I’m not here to judge you, just here to get you back to your brother.”

“If you tell my brother or Aang _anything_ -” Katara began, but Zuko held up a hand to stop her. 

“It’s not my place to tell your brother or Aang what you did,” Zuko cut in, shaking his head. “You made your choice, and I support you. That’s all there is to it. Now come on, before someone sees us here.”

Katara grunted in response, but fell into step beside Zuko, the two picking up speed as they hopped off the path and cut into the woodsy area. The rain was beginning to pour harder now, and Katara relished the way it made her skin tingle with every hard drop. The moon wasn’t full, but she felt her blood coursing in her veins, a new sense of power she had somehow come across on her journey of self-discovery. 

Again, Zuko said nothing beside her, just led her towards where they had hidden Appa in a nearby cave just outside the town. Katara could not help but wonder what Zuko was thinking about. Was he scared of her? Worried about her? Impressed? Maybe he regretted bringing on this journey, regretted turning her into a killer. 

She knew this sensation would not last forever, that soon she would come to regret her decision, learn to possibly hate herself for taking a life that wasn’t hers. But for now, she felt in control. Not so much lighter than she planned to be, but at least she felt a small weight lift off of her shoulders as soon as her ice daggers connected with Yon Rha. 

Through the rain, it was hard to find the cave where Appa was hidden, but together they were able to locate their hiding spot quickly. When Appa poked his head out, he groaned as if he sensed them approaching. She heard Zuko let out a soft chuckle as he sped up, jogging towards Appa. Katara stayed behind, waiting for Zuko to say something, _anything_ to her. 

“We’re back, buddy,” Zuko told Appa once he reached the bison. Katara watched as Zuko placed a hand on Appa’s nose, stroking it softly as Appa let out a satisfied grunt. “Get back in the cave, it’s still raining, and, no offense, I don’t want to smell wet bison all night.”

Appa just groaned in return, but backed up into the cave once more. Zuko stood at the threshold, turning his head slightly to look at Katara who still hung back, her arms hanging loose at her sides. With the way he looked at her, Katara suddenly felt a new sense of shame. 

“Well, are you coming?” Zuko asked, cocking his head to the side and pulling his mask down so that she could see his full face. 

“You still want to be around me?” she replied, also pulling her mask back down, feeling her cheeks flush. “After what I did? After everything that just happened?”

Zuko continued staring, a new emotion in his eyes that Katara had never seen before: pity. He pitied her, pitied the burden she was going to have to carry. Just as quickly as it appeared though, Zuko shook his head, his eyes no longer showing any intimation of pity towards Katara. Instead, he took a step towards her and offered her his hand, palm up towards her as if a peace offering. She eyed it warily, debating on just walking on by him, shouldering past him like she didn’t care about what he thought of her. She hadn’t forgiven him, not yet anyways. Even after what he witnessed, she wasn’t ready to let him in just yet. 

“Katara, I’m not scared of you,” he told her, taking another tentative step towards her, his hand still out before him. “I’ve killed people too.”

Katara felt herself blink, looking up at Zuko’s face as if seeing a new person. Of course he had killed people, he was on the other side of the war for so long Katara would have been more surprised if he said he hadn’t killed before. Still, he had been raised to be a soldier, raised to fight in a war that was started by his own nation. Not only that, but Zuko had been cast out by his own father, he had to fight and bleed and burn for every victory.

This was uncharted territory for Katara, and she knew the waters would be bumpy and rough.

She still had not forgiven him, but there was a new understanding between her and Zuko. One that neither were going to say out loud. Zuko had seen her at her lowest, and Katara had to accept that. No, she hadn’t forgiven him, but she still took his hand carefully, feeling as he wrapped his fingers around hers and pulled her inside the cave. 

“You don’t have to trust me yet, but I want you to know that you’re safe with me,” he said gently, guiding her towards where Appa lay. 

Katara’s heart clenched at his words, but she did not respond, just sat down next to Appa as instructed, rain dripping down her nose and hair, creating puddles next to her. Zuko let go of her hand and turned to walk away, but Katara reached out, grabbing his wrist in her hand. Surprised, he paused and looked down at her.

“You’re soaking wet,” she said simply, letting go of him and letting her hand drop down besides her. 

Zuko looked down at his clothes, the black tunic hugging his body due to the heaviness of the rain that clung to the fabric. “Yes, I am aware.”

“I’m sure it’s not very comfortable,” Katara scoffed, crossing her arms in front of her chest, waiting for Zuko to make the connection. She watched as he thought it through, watched as his cheeks turned slightly pink at what she was trying to tell him. 

“I don’t like having wet clothes, no,” he said finally, the pink of his cheeks a contrast to the red, angry scar on his cheek. “Do you - do you think you can handle this?”

Katara nodded and stood up, motioning for Zuko to follow her towards the cave entrance. She figured it would be easier to bend the water off of their clothing and hair towards the mouth of the cave so that she could release the water into the forest. Like he did only a half hour before, Zuko stood completely still as Katara waved her hand in front of him, pulling the moisture from his clothes and his hair, and throwing it out of the cave. He took a sigh of relief once she finished, and got to work starting a fire as she focused on her own clothes. 

Once she was done, Katara made her way back over to Appa and climbed up his leg into the saddle, grabbing both her and Zuko’s packs. She tossed Zuko’s down on the ground towards him, causing him to pause what he was doing and look up at her. 

“Figured you might want to change,” she told him, tossing her own pack down the opposite side of Appa. She did not wait for Zuko’s response before sliding down Appa’s leg so that Appa now lay between her and Zuko. Instead, she heard Zuko sigh heavily before the sound of fire began crackling throughout the cave. From where she was standing, Katara could see the walls of the cave light up a soft orange.

Not saying anything, she knelt down on the ground and opened her pack, grabbing her water tribe clothing and placing them gently on the ground beside her. Though she wore her leggings underneath the pants, she had opted to take her dress off in order to not be weighed down. She dressed quickly, sliding the black gloves off her hands and replacing them with the loose fabric she usually wore around her arms. Placing a hand to her hair, she undid the ribbon that held her hair up in its ponytail, letting her hair cascade down her shoulders. When she felt presentable, she threw her pack back up on Appa’s saddle and climbed up so that she could look around for the food she and Zuko had packed for the trip. Zuko must have gotten there first, though, because when she looked around, her pack was the only item on Appa’s saddle. Peering down, she saw Zuko, in fresh clothes, rummaging through their food pack on the ground.

Sighing, Katara slid back down Appa’s leg, the bison making a soft, low rumble as she did. Zuko paused what he was doing to look at Katara, silent like always. When they made eye contact, Zuko turned slightly pink and went back to looking through the pack before pulling out a piece of jerky. 

“Hungry?” he asked her, holding it out to her, but Katara just shook her head. He watched her carefully as she leaned up against Appa, drawing her knees to her chest as she watched the flames dance in front of her. “You need to eat, Katara. Keep your strength up.”

“I just told you, I’m not hungry,” she replied coolly, still not looking away from the fire. 

“Okay.” Zuko did not argue with Katara, he seemed to know better. Placing the jerky between his teeth, he closed the pack up before eating. He moved around the cave with purpose, finding the discarded sleeping bags by Appa’s tail and setting them up by the fire. Katara could not help but notice that he made sure to leave plenty of room between the two sleeping bags, as if he knew Katara would throw a fit if the two were too close together. 

_Maybe he is scared of me_ , she thought to herself, but Zuko showed no hint of being scared of the powerful waterbender watching him. 

“Hopefully the rain lets up soon,” he stated, making his way over to where she was sitting to sit by her. He made sure to give her space, as if sensing that she still did not trust him wholly. “We should sleep here tonight, and then tomorrow we can make our way back to the others.” 

“And if the rain doesn’t let up?” Katara couldn’t help but ask, loosening her arms around her knees and letting them fall so that they were crossed in front of her.

Zuko turned to her, a small smile on his lips. “Then it’s a good thing we have a powerful waterbender with us who can bend the rain away, huh?”

He was trying to make her feel better, trying to make her forget about what she had done, and it almost worked. Katara almost felt herself smile at him, almost felt whatever was gripping her heart loosen slightly, but then she remembered him looking at her in the catacombs. Remembered the way he betrayed her. She swallowed and looked away from Zuko, missing the hurt flash on his face as she stared back at the fire. 

“Get some rest, Katara,” Zuko said, standing up slowly and making his way over to one of the sleeping bags. Before he sat down though, he looked over at her again, his eyes boring into her. “Like I said, you don’t have to trust me just yet, but you’re safe with me, okay?”

“Sure,” she replied, leaning against Appa’s leg, feeling his fur tickle her arms. 

With one last look at her, Zuko finally settled down into his sleeping bag, pulling the blanket up to his chin and turning onto his side so that he was laying on his right, his scared eye and ear exposed to the world. Katara flicked her eyes to him, watching as he adjusted slightly before finally going still. She realized, at that moment, that she had never seen him sleep with his scared eye and ear exposed, that he usually slept so that his good ear was facing up. 

_He trusts me,_ she thought to herself, _but I’m still trying to find it in my heart to trust him._

Appa let out a low groan behind her, settling his chin into his front paws. Katara smiled to herself, turning her body so that she could stroke him, curling her fingers into his fur. Zuko was right though, she was going to need her strength if they planned on leaving to meet the others tomorrow. Sighing, she got up and made her way to the sleeping bag Zuko left out for her; however, she did not want to be too close to him, even if she was starting to shiver because of the cold. Stubbornly, she dragged her sleeping bag to Appa’s tail and climbed on, settling into it for warmth. Zuko hadn’t moved the whole time, but she saw through the flames that danced off the cave walls that he was breathing deeply, most likely asleep. 

Laying on her back, she let sleep overtake her, trying to make her forget about the day’s occurrences. 


	2. got my issues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm a little excited about writing this fic since it's been rattling inside my brain for so long. I have chapter 3 written almost halfway, so I'm hoping to get that one out in a couple of days. But I finished this chapter today and I was just so excited that I decided to post it early.
> 
> Thanks to those who've read so far!

Cold. 

That was the only word Katara could use to describe the eyes that stared at her from up above. She had hated those eyes since was seven years old, hated how helpless they made her feel, how completely and totally powerless she was at that very moment. Even now, ten years later, those eyes still stared down at her, still made her feel like a child who could do nothing to save her mother.

But the scene changed, and while the eyes were still cold, it was Katara who was staring from above. He knelt in front of her, his hands on the ground as he begged for mercy, begged to be spared. His eyes weren’t cold anymore, they were full of distress, as if he knew she would not show him any mercy.

“Please, spare me,” he had begged, finally looking away from her, staring at his hands on the ground as Katara sneered. 

“You don’t deserve to be spared,” she had said, watching as the man, the  _ monster _ , in front of her swallowed. 

Then he looked up again. His eyes, once cold and threatening, now soft and safe. A scar stretched over his left eye into his ear, his gray hair now black.

“Are you not going to spare me, Katara?” he asked her, giving her the same, soft smile he gave her weeks ago at the Western Air Temple. “Are you too weak to forgive me? Too much of a coward to tell me how you really feel?”

Before she could stop herself, the scene played out the way it had the day before, Katara moving her arms to create the daggers of ice. She watched as the ice hurtled towards Zuko, towards the only person willing to take a chance on her, and she heard herself scream.

“Katara!” someone yelled. “Katara! Wake up!”

She felt like she was being rocked back and forth, warm fingers pressed on her arm as she screamed.

“Katara, it’s a nightmare!” he yelled again, shaking her more.

Katara gasped awake, sitting up straight and almost hitting Zuko’s head with her own. Placing a hand on her chest, she heaved, trying to calm her breathing down enough. Zuko knelt beside her, his hand still on her arm as he stared at her with worry. 

“Let go of me,” she rasped, pulling her arm away from him when she finally caught her breath. 

Zuko didn’t reach for her again, just sat back on his feet watching Katara as she wiped the sweat off her brow. 

“Stop that,” she demanded, glaring at him. 

Zuko held his hands up in surrender. “Sorry. Are you okay?”

“Fine,” she snapped, scooting away from him. There was no reason for her to be mad at him, no reason for her to snap at him when he did nothing wrong. It was  _ her  _ \- no, it was her dream self that almost killed him. She shuddered slightly, half expecting Zuko to make a move towards her again, but he did not. Instead, he placed his hands down on his legs, studying Katara carefully.

“You know, I dreamt about the first man I killed for almost a month,” he said gently, sighing deeply. “I was only fourteen, and I thought Agni was going to strike me down for taking another person’s life.”

“Why did you kill him?” She’s not sure why she asked, but she was curious. He was opening up to her, trying to relate to her. The last time that happened, though, he betrayed her. Will he betray her again?

“He had attacked my uncle and I,” Zuko explained, now sitting down fully atop Appa’s tail and crossing his legs. “We were traveling through the Earth Kingdom, we had been separated from our troops. Luckily, I had my broadswords and he wasn’t a very good fighter.”

“Did you have to kill him?” she asked, finally looking over at him. 

Zuko’s shoulders tensed at the question and he stared down at his hands in his lap. “No. I don’t think I did.”

“Would you take it back?” she prompted, desperately trying to figure out her own thoughts, her own feelings.

Zuko looked up, his eyes meeting hers. “No.”

“Okay.” Katara swallowed, then laid back down in her sleeping bag, staring up at the ceiling of the cave. It was dark, the moon barely shining through the mouth of the cave as the rain still poured outside. 

“We still have a few hours until sunrise,” Zuko told her, slowly making his way off Appa’s tail. “Try and get some sleep, then we can head out.”

“Sure,” Katara replied, placing her hands behind her head.

She heard Zuko sigh lightly and the rustle of him settling back into his sleeping bag. It is then Katara realized that she did not want to sleep alone that night, that she knew nightmares were going to continue to plague her if she went back to sleep.

It was funny, but she felt like Aang those few days before the invasion. He refused to sleep because of the nightmares that kept popping up and telling him that he was not going to win against the Fire Lord. There was a pang in her heart when she remembered Aang, and she could not help but feel like she let him down by killing Yon Rha. He had told her to let go of her hate, to confront the man who killed her mother, but to walk away. 

“Zuko,” she called out before she could stop herself. “Are you - are you still awake?”

“Just settled back down, Katara,” he replied, shifting so he could look at her. “Are you okay?”

“Did I make a mistake?” she asked, avoiding Zuko’s question. “In killing Yon Rha. Did I - did I disappoint anyone?”

Zuko was quiet for a minute, clearly trying to find an answer that would not upset her. “In the end, Katara, killing Yon Rha was your decision to make. You did what you thought was right, and only you can decide whether or not to move on from this.”

“But will anyone think of me differently?” she asked, feeling her voice crack, feeling the tears welling up in her eyes. 

“I don’t know for sure, Katara,” Zuko admitted, “but they might.”

“What - what do I do?” she asked, finally letting a tear escape the corner of her eye, sliding down towards her ear. “What did you do?”

“I moved on,” he said simply. “But like I said, I dreamt about the man for a month. But I had my uncle to help me, to assure me that life will continue.”

“He was evil, Zuko,” she cried, vigorously wiping a hand over her eyes. “Pure evil. He stole a mother from her children, a wife from her husband, an innocent woman solely because he was trying to eradicate a whole  _ culture  _ of people.”

“So do you think that your actions were justified?” he asked her. Katara still could not see him, but she could hear him moving around in his spot. 

“Yes, I think so,” Katara replied. “But - but was his life not mine to take?”

“Again, Katara, I don’t have all the answers,” Zuko said sadly. “If I did, then you know I would give you anything you wanted.”

Katara wanted a lot of things: answers, stability, a world that wasn’t plagued by war. Deep in her heart, she knew Zuko was telling her the truth, knew that Zuko would drop everything to give her what she wanted if he could. She hated him for it, hated that he felt like he owed her something because he made a mistake. Or did she hate herself for not forgiving him so easily? 

_ Are you too weak to forgive me?  _ Is that not what he asked her in her dream? 

“Katara, I - I’m here if you want to talk,” he told her. “About… anything, I guess.”

“I think I want to go back to sleep,” she replied, rolling over onto her side so that she could have a better view of him. From her spot on Appa’s tail, she could see that he was laying on his stomach, propped up on his elbows, staring up at her with such tenderness written on his face.

No, she didn’t hate him. Just didn’t trust him...yet. 

“Okay,” he relented, rolling back over onto his back. “Good night, Katara.”

“Good night, Zuko,” she told him. “And… thanks.”

“Anytime,” he replied softly.

Katara stayed where she was, watching Zuko as he closed his eyes. Soon, the cave was filled with Zuko’s soft breathing, which then lulled Katara back to sleep.

This time, her mind was free from dreams.

* * *

When Katara woke up the next morning, she wasn’t surprised to find that the rain was still pounding down on the ground. If anything, it sounded like it was coming down even harder than the day before. Sitting up, her eyes fell on Zuko’s empty sleeping bag, and for a moment Katara became worried that he left her alone in the cave. But as soon as this thought entered her head, it was dissipated by the sound of fire popping and someone moving on Appa’s saddle.

“Oh, good, you’re awake,” came Zuko’s voice from above. Katara turned her body so that she was facing up, Zuko looking down at her from Appa’s saddle. “Did you sleep well?”

“A bit better,” she answered, slipping out of her sleeping bag and kneeling beside it to roll it up. When she snapped the buttons up, she threw it up at Zuko who caught it and added it to the rest of the packs. “How long have you been up?”

“Since sunrise,” Zuko replied, hopping out of the saddle and landing softly on his feet beside Appa. He was already dressed, his broadswords strapped to his back. “I thought I would pack everything up before you woke up. That way, all we have to do is eat and then leave.”

Katara joined him on the ground, standing by him as he motioned to the fruits that sat in a bag by the fire. 

“Okay,” was all Katara could think of saying before sitting down and grabbing a mango from the pile. They didn’t have anything to cut their fruit with, so Katara resorted to just biting into it, letting some of the juices burst and slip down her chin. Zuko stifled his laughter when he saw her, but didn’t say anything else. He grabbed some lychee nuts for himself and began eating, keeping a comfortable silence between them. 

Weeks ago, Katara would have hated sitting with Zuko in silence. She would have done anything in her power to avoid having to sit with him, making up some excuse about chores she had to get to or calling someone over to join them. Right now, though, Katara didn’t hate sharing a quiet meal with the exiled Fire Prince. While she was relentless in not letting him in, so sure that he was just infiltrating their camp to turn them into Ozai or Azula, he had proven himself over and over again. 

Perhaps she had forgiven him already, but she wasn’t ready to admit that to him just yet. 

When they finished eating, Zuko snuffed out the flames and turned to Appa, resting a hand on the bison’s leg.

“Ready to go, Appa?” he asked gently, causing Appa to grumble lightly. Zuko chuckled before climbing up on Appa, not even waiting for Katara to join him. He settled on Appa’s head, grabbing the reins to guide the bison out into the pouring rain. Katara couldn’t help but be surprised by how much Appa trusted Zuko; but then again, Zuko was the one who let Appa free under Lake Laogai, wasn’t he? Zuko looked down from Appa’s head at Katara, arching his lone eyebrow at her. “Are you coming? Or would you like to live in this cave for the rest of your life?”

“Are you trying to tease me?” she scoffed, climbing up Appa’s leg and swinging herself into the saddle. 

Zuko turned to look at her, a small grin on his face when he did. “I guess I am.”

“Well, I can’t say it’s… terrible,” Katara conceded, trying to keep herself from smiling back at him. 

Zuko chuckled again. “I will take that as an almost compliment, I suppose. Are you ready to head out?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Katara replied, getting into position. She was going to bend the rain water around Appa as he flew away from the island they were currently occupying. Hopefully, once they get far enough away from the archipelago, they’ll hit clearer skies. 

“Great,” Zuko stated, turning back around so that he was facing front. “All right, Appa, once we’re out of this cave, get ready to fly.”

Appa roared in agreement and began moving towards the mouth of the cave. Katara bent down, positioning her arms in front of her to get ready. As soon as they were out of the cave fully, Katara moved her arms in circles, stopping the rain from falling around them, creating a dome similar to the one she created the day before, right before she - 

No, no distractions. Katara needed to focus on her bending if she and Zuko were to get back to the others. 

“Appa, yip yip!” Zuko called over the noise of the rain, and Appa leapt up into the air. It was lucky that Appa was so used to Katara’s bending, or else she’s sure he would have been frightened. Instead, Appa focused on flying again, slowly gaining altitude. 

Zuko focused on the sky ahead, not even turning to look back at Katara as she continued her task of keeping the rain water at bay. Already, she was exhausted, but she shoved the feeling down, desperate to get home.

“I’ve never seen a storm this bad,” Zuko called back to her. “I guess the islands that surround the capital get it worse.”

“Zuko, I know you want to chat, but I’m kind of busy here,” Katara scolded, rolling her eyes at the back of Zuko’s head. He shrugged a bit, but stayed silent.

It wasn’t long until they were finally above water, and Katara took a chance to look down at the ocean below. She was surprised to see the stormy waters, the way the waves flew into the air and crashed down into each other. It reminded her of the storm she, Sokka, and Aang got caught in months ago, when they plunged deep into the water and Aang had to go into the Avatar state to save them and - 

“Katara, it looks really bad down there,” Zuko called back again, this time turning slightly so that he could face her. She couldn’t help noticing the worry in his eyes when he flicked them down slightly. “Maybe we should turn back, wait another day or two until the storm settles.”

Katara shook her head, still focusing on her movements, trying not to draw attention to how heavy her arms felt. Zuko was probably right, but they had to get to the others. Sozin’s comet was only two months away, and if they wanted to help Aang win, well, they had to get back to him as soon as possible. 

“I can do this,” she assured him, looking away from him and staring at the dome that she created around Appa. Rain fell on it, sliding off as if it were made of stone instead of its fellow droplets of water. Katara could not help but marvel at her own power, especially since at the beginning of her journey with Aang, she had barely been able to create a water whip. 

“Katara, I know you can,” Zuko told her, still watching her every move. “I’m just worried that -”

“What, that I’m not strong enough?” Katara snapped, looking at Zuko, slightly pausing her movements before remembering what she was doing. Turning red, she got back to work, feeling Appa lean to the right a bit to avoid a large wave that crept into the sky. 

“No, that’s not what I’m saying at all,” Zuko replied, his tone somewhat surprised. “You know what, never mind. I need to focus on flying.”

With that, Zuko turned back around just as lightning struck the water a few feet ahead of them. Katara gasped, almost stopping her bending once more, just as Zuko pulled on Appa’s reins to steer him clear of the lightning bolt. Appa roared in response, clearly spooked, just as a rumble of thunder pierced the air. Maybe Zuko was right, they should have waited. But they were already high in the sky, creeping their way above the vast ocean, and it was too late to turn back now. Wasn’t it? 

Above the sound of the rain hitting her dome, Katara could hear Zuko softly assuring Appa that it was all right, that Katara was going to keep him safe. She felt bad for snapping at Zuko now. 

Just then, another crack of lightning struck near them, Zuko once again pulling the reins to get Appa out of the way. Katara focused all of her energy on the water surrounding her, but she couldn’t help but begin to worry. Lightning was drawn to water, and she had basically created a magnet. Waves crashed below them, each one getting closer to Appa. Or was Appa losing height? Whichever it was, they were closer to the water now, and Katara squeezed her eyes shut, trying with all her might to focus.

She had to get to the others. Her heart ached with longing as she thought of Sokka, probably at his wits end worrying about her. Aang probably was too, definitely pacing around their little camp like he always did when he was worried. Toph was probably in her rock tent, picking her teeth and telling the two boys not to worry so much. Suki might be with Sokka, holding his hand and assuring him that Katara and Zuko would be back soon.

More lightning, this time too close to Appa who roared once more, raising himself slightly backwards, causing Katara to lose her footing and tumble back into the back of the saddle, completing losing control of the rain water in her grasp. The rain felt like tiny knives against her skin as she tried to stand up, Zuko yelling at her above the rain to ask if she was okay. She can feel Appa slowly drifting down, closer to the waves that continue to dance in the rain.

Yon Rha’s face stared back at her when she blinked. 

“Katara!” Zuko yelled as she stood up. There was fear in his voice, and Katara’s pretty sure she’s never heard him be scared before. “Katara! Are you okay?!”

Just as she was about to answer, about to raise her arms once more, lightning struck the water next to Appa causing him to roll over. Katara, who was not secured to the saddle, felt herself fall. 

Down, down, down, plunging into the stormy black water below. Completely submerged, Katara kicks her feet, pulling herself up to the surface. Head finally above water, she coughs, trying to tread as best she can to look around, trying to spot Appa in the sky.

A wave crashed over her, causing her to be submerged once more. With all her might, she propelled herself up, breaking the surface once more. Rain water fell into her eyes, making it hard to see. She turned around, flailing her arms as she tried to spot Appa.

“Katara!” came a voice behind her, and she turned to find Zuko swimming over to her. Just before he could reach her though, he slipped below the surface, a look of pure panic on his face. 

Without thinking, Katara dove under, opening her eyes to try and find Zuko in the dark sea. Just in front of her, Zuko was struggling, flailing his arms around him, and Katara propelled herself to him, looping an arm around his torso and pulling him up with her. Both coughed as they hit the air, Katara’s grip still tight around Zuko. 

Adjusting as well as he could, Zuko turned to face Katara, placing his hands on her cheeks, looking her in the eyes. “Can you bend us out of here?”

Katara nodded, and, still gripping Zuko, did her best to propel them both towards where she hoped was land. Each time they slipped below the surface, Katara created a pocket of air for them to breathe. She had hoped it was enough. Zuko was no longer holding her face, but his arms were wrapped tightly around her. She had no idea where Appa was, but she knew she couldn’t worry about him just now; she had to focus on getting her and Zuko towards safety. Then again, she had no idea where she was going, but at this point, all she could do was hope.

_ I don’t want to die _ , she thought to herself suddenly, her heart pounding in her chest, an ache in her lungs.  _ I don’t want to die _ .

With all her strength, she continued pushing and pulling the water around her, focusing all of her energy on getting out of this alive. Next to her, Zuko kicked with his feet to help pick up speed, and though Katara felt resentment against him only a few days before, she realized she did not want him to die either. 

She was going to get them out of this. She had to. 


	3. still breathing

Back at the camp, Sokka paced back and forth between his tent and the tent Suki and Katara had shared. Every once in a while, he would pause to look up at the sky, placing his hand against his face to screen his eyes from the sun.

“You’re looking out for them too, huh?” Aang asked, sidling up next to the older boy and looking up at the sky as well. 

“I just thought they would be back by now, that’s all,” Sokka stated, looking away from the sky to look at Aang. The young Avatar’s face was unreadable as he stared ahead, but Sokka didn’t want to push him any further. “They’ll be back, I know they will.”

“Do you think - do you think she went through with it?” Aang asked, still not looking away from the sky. “Katara. Do you think she killed him?”

Sokka shrugged. “Can’t tell you, but if she did -”

“I hope she didn’t,” Aang interrupted, finally tearing his eyes away from the sky and making eye contact with Sokka. “She’s better than that.”

“It’s not your choice, Aang,” Sokka told him sternly, clapping the young Avatar on the back. “Whatever Katara’s decision, we have to support her.”

Aang was just about to open his mouth when Sokka spotted something in the sky. Squinting, he gripped Aang’s shoulder, trying to make out the figure slowly approaching. 

“Is that-?” he started, and a low rumble answered his question.

“Appa!” Aang called, pulling himself away from Sokka and running forwards. “They’re back!”

“Sugar Queen and Sparky are back?” Toph asked, approaching from her rock tent. “We’re finally leaving this place? We can finally stop camping?”

Sokka ran up next to Aang, watching Appa fly towards them at a quick speed. Something felt off, though, but Sokka wasn’t sure what. 

But once Appa landed, Sokka figured it out: there was no one in the saddle, no one driving Appa. 

“Where are Katara and Zuko?” Aang asked, eyes widening as he leapt on Appa’s head. “What happened?”

Sokka reached out and stroked Appa’s nose, trying to figure out what to do next. Questions swirled through his mind: what happened to Zuko and Katara? How did Appa get here without them? 

“Everything okay?” Suki asked, making her way out of her tent and heading towards the others. “Appa’s here, where’s Katara and Zuko?”

“We’re trying to figure that out,” Sokka sighed, removing his hand from Appa, who was cowering into his paws. 

Aang was studying the saddle, trying to find any trace of evidence of what happened. “Their packs are gone too. Do you think they sent Appa ahead of them?”

“Seems unlikely,” Sokka answered, shaking his head. He watched as Suki approached Appa herself, giving him a hug as if trying to comfort him. Though as soon as she leaned into him, Sokka watched her eyes go wide. “What’s up, Suki?”

“He’s soaking wet,” Suki told them, pulling away from Appa and looking over at Sokka. “He must have gotten caught in a storm or something.”

“So, what, they got caught in a storm and…” Aang started, suddenly going silent. “But, Katara is a waterbender, she must have been able to handle this.”

“Aang, we can’t make assumptions,” Sokka told him as Aang jumped down from atop Appa, creating a puff of air to land. 

“Do you even  _ care  _ what happened to them?” Aang snapped, pointing a finger at Sokka. “She’s your  _ sister  _ and you’re oddly calm about this!”

Sokka held up his hands in surrender. “Aang, I get it, trust me I’m worried. But like you said, Katara’s a powerful waterbender, and Zuko is pretty strong on his own as well. Whatever happened, I’m sure they’re okay.”

“We have to go after them! We have to find them!” Aang exclaimed, already moving back to Appa. Sokka grabbed his arm, causing Aang to glare at him. “Sokka, we need to find them.”

“Aang, I’m worried too,” Sokka assured him, “but think this through. You’re the Avatar, you’re the last hope for stopping the Fire Nation.”

“So?”

“So, maybe Sokka is right, Twinkle Toes,” Toph stated, crossing her arms. “The Fire Nation knows you’re alive, and sure we can hide in plain sight with disguises, but I don’t think that’s a really good idea.”

“Plus, imagine what would happen if you’re caught,” Sokka said, letting go of Aang. “I hate waiting just as much as you, but I don’t think it’s worth the risk.”

“You act like you don’t care,” Aang argued, glaring between Toph and Sokka. 

Sokka felt himself wince, but Toph spoke up. “Aang, think about it. We’re all worried, we all want Katara and Zuko to be okay, but marching into the Fire Nation  _ as the Avatar _ right before the comet is probably the worst idea.”

“I’m with Sokka and Toph on this one,” Suki stated, giving Aang an apologetic smile. “They’re right though, Katara and Zuko can take care of themselves.”

“Zuko told me right before they left that he knew a good place for us to hide until the comet once he and Katara returned.” Sokka looked around at the other three: Toph whose arms were still crossed, Aang who looked disgruntled, and Suki who just watched the other two. 

“So?” Aang asked, still looking angry. “How does that help us?”

“Because he told me that his family had a house on Ember Island that they don’t go to anymore,” Sokka answered, frowning slightly and rubbing his forehead. “If something happened, I’m sure Zuko will try to get him and Katara there. Sort of like a rendezvous point.”

“Sokka’s right,” Suki added, nodding her head. “If anything, maybe we should head to Ember Island, wait at the estate until they get there.”

“And if they don’t?” Aang snapped, causing Suki to raise her eyebrows at him. 

“Then we go after them,” Sokka assured him, reaching for the Avatar’s shoulder. “Trust me, Aang, we’ll figure it out.”

“I don’t like it,” Aang replied, shrugging Sokka’s hand off his shoulder. “But if it’s three against one… fine.”

“We’ll come up with a plan,” Sokka continued. Appa roared, causing everyone to look at him. “It’s okay, Appa, you get some rest for now.”

Appa roared again and Aang went over to pat him. “You did your best, buddy, it’s okay.”

Sokka motioned for Suki to follow him, leaving Aang and Toph to care for Appa. Once far enough away, he turned to face the Kyoshi Warrior.

“Are we making a mistake?” Sokka asked her, trying to keep his voice even. “What if Aang’s right, and something happened, and -”

“Hey, hey, Sokka,” Suki said gently, wrapping her arms around Sokka and pulling him in for a hug. Automatically, his arms went around her waist as he buried his face in her neck. He wanted to collapse, wanted to fall apart, but Suki held him up. “Sokka, it’ll be okay, I know it will be.”

“How do you know?” he asked, voice muffled by her hair. He was happy about that though, since he did not want Suki to hear him crying. Not yet, anyways.

“Because, like you said, your sister and Zuko are tough,” Suki continued, one hand making its way to Sokka’s head, stroking the back of his neck. “You’ll see her again, Sokka, I know it.”

“I can’t lose her,” Sokka cried, squeezing his eyes shut. “First my mom, then my sister? Suki, I almost lost my dad too.”

Suki pulled away, placing her hands softly on Sokka’s face, looking at him with soft eyes. “She’s going to make it, Sokka. You have to trust her.”

Sokka just nodded, placing a hand against Suki’s. “Okay.” 

* * *

When Katara woke up, the first thing she noticed was the burning in her lungs. Every breath she took was like a fire in her heart, a gasping, wheezing feeling that wouldn’t leave her. 

The second thing she noticed was that she was alone. Panicked, she lifted herself up on her arms, glancing around the beachy area she found herself on. The rain was still thick, and she felt her head pounding, but she was forgetting someone - someone important.

“Zuko!” she attempted to call, but it came out like a croak. “Zuko…”

Groaning, she got on her hands and knees and began crawling, trying to see through the rain, patting the sand in front of her. He was with her when they washed up, wasn’t he? He was holding on to her as she bent the water around her. She was pretty sure Zuko didn’t slip through her fingers. Right?

Suddenly, she collapsed on her stomach, burying her face in her arms and letting out a sob. If something happened to Zuko, it was all her fault. She was the one who insisted they head back to the others despite Zuko’s suggestion that they should wait out the storm. It was Katara who decided that she was strong enough to bend the storm - and she was! But something held her back. She just wasn’t sure what.

Now Zuko was possibly hurt or, worse, dead and she hadn’t even told him that she had forgiven him. 

Letting out another sob, she looked up again, squinting through the storm to see if she could find anything up ahead. Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, she got back up on her hands and knees and continued crawling along the sand, using one hand to pat the sand in front of her. The rain was relentless, and while Katara could have used her bending, she felt exhausted - the type of exhaustion that crept into her bones and made them feel like lead. 

Finally, her hand hit something. Carefully, she moved her hand up, feeling the soft surface under the palm of her hand, until she felt something soft: fabric.  _ Zuko _ . Wiping the rain and tears from her eyes, Katara scooted herself closer to Zuko, who was laying on the sand face down, his arms splayed out above him. Somehow, his broadswords were still attached to his back. 

“Zuko,” she prodded, poking his side with her finger to try and wake him up. When he didn’t stir, she flipped him over, cradling his head with her arm. “Zuko, come on, wake up.”

Still, Zuko laid silent. She pressed her palm to his chest, barely feeling a heartbeat. Unsure of what to do, she reached out with her bending, looking for a source of life. Slowly moving her hand up, she felt the water in his lungs and immediately pulled at the water, bending it upwards. She watched as the water forced its way out of Zuko’s mouth, Zuko sputtering as soon as the water left his body. Without giving Katara time to react, Zuko shot up, pulling himself away from her and rolling over to his hands and knees. Katara looked away as he vomited up the rest of the water in his belly. As he sat there heaving, Katara drew her knees to her chest, sobbing once more.

Zuko, to his credit, recovered quickly and looked over at Katara, registering the distress in her body language. Without saying anything, he crawled over and sat in front of her, placing his hands on either side of her face. She squeezed her eyes shut, refusing to look Zuko in the eyes as she cried.

“Katara, Katara, are you okay?” he pressed urgently, sliding his right thumb along the bottom of her eye, as if trying to wipe away a tear. 

Katara shook her head as best she could with Zuko’s hands on either side of her face, taking a shuddering breath as she did. She heard Zuko swear as he removed his hands from her face. 

“We need to move, Katara,” he said, and Katara opened her eyes to see him getting up slowly, placing a hand to his chest as if still in pain. 

But Katara refused to move, just dug her face in her knees, causing Zuko to groan. Without warning, she felt his hands under her armpits, pulling her up to her feet. He slid one of her arms around his shoulders, grabbing her hand with his. His other arm slid around her waist, pulling her closer to him. He must have been expecting a fight, because he held her tightly against him as he began dragging her away from the shore. She heard him hiss in pain, but she was too busy with her own emotions to register anything else.

“We need shelter,” Zuko said, more to himself than to Katara. “Where are we anyways?”

Katara didn’t answer, just sniffed as Zuko continued leading her towards a vaguely made path that must have led somewhere. It was bitter work, Zuko half dragging, half carrying Katara along the path, each step for him harder than the next. Katara wanted to help him, wanted to walk herself, but she was so tired, so exhausted that she wouldn’t have been able to support herself even if she tried. 

“There, Katara, look,” Zuko said finally, motioning with his chin towards a tiny barn just off the path. “ _ Shelter _ . I know you’re tired, Katara, but do you think you can make it?”

Katara nodded, feeling her legs go wobbly as Zuko helped her balance. He still kept his arm wrapped around her waist, still held the hand that was wrapped around his shoulder. Each step Katara took felt awful, as if her feet were made of rocks, but together she and Zuko were able to make it to the barn. To their luck, the barn wasn’t locked, and Zuko let go of Katara’s hand to slide the door open as gently and as quietly as he could. Once open, they made their way inside, noticing only a pile of hay that lay just right of the door. Besides that, the barn was empty.

Zuko led Katara towards the hay, letting her go and gently guiding her down. As soon as she was sitting, Katara drew her knees to her chest once more, looking up at Zuko through her tears. 

“Katara…” he started, sitting down next to her tentatively, reaching a hand out towards her.

As soon as he said her name, Katara flung herself into him, sobbing into the crook of his neck as he carefully wrapped his arms around her, patting her on the back.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I should have listened to you,” she cried through deep gasping breaths. “I thought - I thought I could do it. And now we’re stranded, and Appa is  _ lost  _ and everyone is going to be so worried. And Aang - oh Spirits, Aang, he already lost Appa once, he’s going to hate -”

“Woah, Katara, hey,” Zuko said softly, now rubbing his hand in soothing circles along her back. “Please, don’t be sorry. You did the best you could.”

“But I thought I could do it.” She began crying harder. Katara was a master waterbender, the first female taught by Master Pakku in the Northern Water Tribe. She was the Avatar’s waterbending sifu. Katara was supposed to be strong, and she felt so useless. 

“Katara, please remember everything you did prior to this storm,” Zuko told her, finally pulling away from her and placing his hands on her shoulders. “You’re going through a lot mentally, and this was just a tipping point. You over exerted yourself.”

“But what about Aang?” Katara cried, swallowing. “He’s going to be-”

“Katara, you’re going to need to forget about Aang right now,” Zuko interrupted, causing Katara’s jaw to drop. Zuko winced and removed his hands from Katara, before rubbing the back of his neck. “Shit, that sounded a lot worse than I meant for it to be.”

“No kidding.” Katara wiped her tears away with the back of her hand as Zuko adjusted himself next to her.

“Listen, Katara,” Zuko sighed deeply, “we need to focus on the present. We’re alive because of you, okay?  _ You  _ got us out of that storm.  _ You  _ got us to shore. And I’m sure Appa got away too; he’s a smart bison, I’m sure he found his way back to everyone else.”

Katara sniffed. “I guess so.”

“Tell me what you’re thinking, Katara,” Zuko prompted, placing his elbow on his knee and propping his chin on his hand. 

“It’s nothing - it’s stupid,” Katara stated softly, looking away from Zuko. She felt more tears welling up in her eyes and she wiped away at them stubbornly. She was done crying in front of Zuko.

Zuko studied her silently, eyes sweeping over her. Sighing, he pushed himself off the hay and stood up, looking down at Katara. “Listen, it seems like it’s about midday, but you’re exhausted. Get some rest and I’ll keep watch, okay?”

Katara nodded, but didn’t move from her position. She bit her lip as Zuko moved to the door of the barn, opening it somewhat to look outside. The sound of thunder boomed, reverberating against the walls of the barn and Katara felt herself jump. Zuko turned just in time to catch her.

“You’re safe with me,” he reminded her, placing a hand over his heart. “I promise.”

“I - yeah,” Katara stammered, watching as Zuko gave her a small smile. 

“Get some rest, Katara,” he repeated, turning to look outside once more.

So Katara laid back on the hay, turning so that she was resting on the side facing Zuko. He told her she didn’t have to trust him just yet, but he promised that she was safe with him. He’d proven himself to her hadn’t he? He’d saved her from falling rocks, helped her hunt down her mother’s killer. Stood by decision to kill the monster who tore her family apart. 

“Zuko?” she piped up from her spot, her voice soft. She felt her eyes starting to droop, her vision going blurry. It was then she realized she was still soaking wet from the mix of salt water and rain, but she didn’t really care.

“Yeah, Katara?” he replied gently. 

“You’re - you’re okay,” she said before finally closing her eyes and tucking her hands under her head. 

Zuko’s light chuckle and the rhythm of the rain keeping time were the last sounds Katara heard before succumbing to sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did a thing with the last line. Did you catch it?


	4. something tragic about you

It was the pounding of the rain against the roof of the barn that caused Katara to jerk awake, sitting up quickly so that spots danced in her vision. She refused to believe it was the dream she was having, the one where Aang went into the Avatar State and almost killed her for losing Appa. No, it was just the rain, nothing else.

Breathing heavily, she looked around the barn, noticing that Zuko was nowhere to be found. Why was it that whenever she woke up, Zuko was gone, out of sight? Did he finally leave her? Finally decide that he didn’t want to deal with her anymore? Was he finally sick of the broken girl who refused to be put back together?

She did not have to worry long, because soon after the barn door slid open and Zuko walked in, a new cloak around his shoulders and a bag in his hand. He closed the door gently, not noticing that Katara had woken up. Katara cleared her throat.

“Oh, you’re awake,” he stated, turning to look at her and pulling his hood away from his face. “How are you feeling?”

“Sore,” Katara admitted, rotating her shoulder carefully. “But I don’t know if it’s because of overexerting myself or sleeping funny.”

Zuko shrugged and walked over, tossing the bag over to Katara where it landed next to her. Curiously, Katara opened the bag, feeling her eyes widen when she looked inside. Reaching in, she pulled out a red top similar to the one she had left back at the camp. She looked up at Zuko who was slowly removing his cloak and the broadswords strapped to his back. 

“Where did you get this?” she asked him, watching as he threw his broadswords on the hay. 

“When you were asleep, I was able to sneak into town,” Zuko explained, sitting down next to Katara. 

“So you stole these?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at him, causing him to flush. When he nodded, Katara almost felt herself starting to laugh, but she bit her lip to stop herself. Instead, she pulled out the pants that went along with the top and said, “It’s fine, the others and I stole the clothes that we have too.”

“I figured,” Zuko replied, leaning down on his elbow and running a hand through his hair. “Figured it would be good to blend in since we have no idea how long we’re going to be here. Might be a good idea to just hide in plain sight, find a way to get money and a way off this island.”

“Do you know where we washed up?” Katara asked, pushing herself off the hay and grabbing the clothes. 

Zuko shook his head. “No, not yet. If we’re lucky, back where we started.”

“Mind looking away?” she asked, holding up the clothes in her hand. 

Zuko went red once more, but closed his eyes and turned his head so that he could not see Katara. Again, Katara bit her lip to keep herself from laughing before starting to strip off her dress and leggings. She pulled on the pants, the fabric lighter than what she was used to. Slowly, she put on the top, tighter than the one she left back at the camp, but still comfortable. Remembering her mother’s necklace, she placed a hand to her throat, fiddling with the pendant that sat there, a constant reminder of her mother. After the ordeal she went through, she really did not want to part with it, but it was so obviously Water Tribe that she and Zuko would be caught in a moment. Her sighing must have caused Zuko to worry, because when she looked up, he was staring right at her. When she caught him staring, he blinked and looked away once more, clearly trying to brush off his awkwardness.

“I hope you didn’t look at me when my clothes were off?” she teased lightly, still fiddling with the pendant. It was silly, really, but she did not want to let it go. 

“I- well - uh, no, but you sighed, so -” Zuko was stuttering, pinching the bridge of his nose as he tried to figure out a way out of the hole he dug himself into. 

Without meaning to, Katara began to laugh, not bursting at the seams with joy, but a slow, breathy type laugh that proved she wasn’t  _ angry  _ at Zuko, rather the opposite really. She never realized just how awkward he could be, especially when he was trying so hard to keep the peace. 

“I know, Zuko,” she told him when he finally looked up at her, his eyes wide with surprise. “I figured.”

“Okay, yeah, great,” he replied, giving Katara a lopsided grin. “Are you okay? You seem… deep in thought.”

Katara looked down at the necklace between her fingers, letting out a sigh of resignation. “I don’t want to take off my mother’s necklace, that’s all.”

Zuko stood up and walked over to her, tentatively placing a hand on her shoulder. When she didn’t shrug him away, his own shoulders relaxed as he looked down at the necklace himself. 

“It’s just - after what I just did. It feels wrong, I guess,” she explained evenly, refusing to look up at the boy,  _ man _ , in front of her. Katara hated being weak, especially in front of him. 

“I understand,” he said, squeezing her shoulder. 

“I don’t think you do,” she muttered, releasing the pendant and letting her hand fall to her side. 

“No, maybe I don’t,” Zuko agreed, grabbing Katara’s chin with his other hand and guiding her to look at him. She made eye contact, his golden eyes staring down at her. There was no pity in them, no terror or awe like the night before. No, there was something else, something Katara couldn’t place her finger on. “This necklace -'' he placed a finger on the pendant - “makes you feel close to her, right? And after finally seeking vengeance, you feel like you owe it to her in a way.”

Katara swallowed. “Yes.”

“Katara, there’s more,” he stated,releasing Katara and taking a step back to study her. “You don’t have to tell me right now, but can I tell you something my uncle shared with me when I was an angry teenager mad at the whole world after being banished?”

“Yes.”

“You don’t have to go through it alone,” Zuko told her, a soft look on his face. “You’re only human, and no human can withstand so much pressure on themselves. If you hold it all in, let the pressure weigh you down, you’ll explode. Maybe I, or the others, won’t understand your pain specifically, but we can help you carry the burden. Does that make sense?”

Katara nodded, placing her hand on the necklace one more, feeling the cool stone between her fingers. She looked at Zuko, but he was already moving away from her, grabbing his broadswords and strapping them to his back and throwing the cloak around his shoulders. He motioned at Katara’s discarded dress and leggings on the floor and Katara bent down and shoved them in the bag that once had held her disguise. When she stood back up, Zuko held his hand out for the bag.

“So, what are you going to do?” he asked as she handed him the bag. 

Without much of a choice, Katara unclasped the strap from behind and felt it slide off her neck. Holding it in one hand, she stared down at it, the leather straps hanging off the side of her hand, then pendant resting on her palm. 

“I can - I can hold on to it if you like?” Zuko offered. “I - uh - kept it safe once.”

Katara remembered that - remembered how he had used it to taunt her, to track down her and her friends’ whereabouts. But that was when they were different people then, weren’t they? Though she was hesitant, still learning to trust him once more, she knew, deep down, Zuko had good intentions. 

“Yeah, okay,” Katara agreed, handing the necklace over to Zuko who took it carefully in his hand. He gave it one look of consideration before gently placing it in the pocket of his trousers, covering up with the cloak. Katara hated how naked her neck felt without the necklace. 

“So, I think we should head into town,” Zuko told her, throwing the bag in his hand over his shoulder. “Get some idea about where we are, then figure out a way to get to Ember Island.”

“Ember Island?” Katara asked, raising an eyebrow at him. “Why there?”

“Before we left, I told Sokka it would be a great place to hide in plain sight,” Zuko explained with a small shrug. “My family owns an estate on the edge of the island away from peering eyes, it would be a great place to hide and train before the comet comes.”

“That’s actually a pretty good idea,” Katara admitted as Zuko made his way to the door. 

Before opening it, he turned to face her, giving her a smirk. “I have those sometimes, Katara. Now come on, let’s head out.”

Together, they made their way out of the barn and into the rain to find themselves on the path towards the small village Zuko had been to previously. Instinctively, Katara reached out and looped her arm around Zuko’s. She felt him tense momentarily before relaxing at her touch, pulling her close to him. 

As they walked, Katara wished she could waterbend the rain away from her. It was still pouring, but at least the heavy droplets no longer felt like tiny knives against her skin. Not only that, but she wished she had had time to heal herself before she and Zuko head to the village. She was still sore, and though her lungs no longer burned, her muscles still groaned with each step she took. At one point, Zuko winced next to her when she accidentally bumped into him as they were walking. Maybe she should offer to heal him later if they had the time. 

Finally, they arrived at the edge of the small village. Small storefronts lined the main path, houses scattered along the outskirts. Due to the rain, there was no one out and about save for Katara and Zuko. If she squinted through the rain, Katara could see the soft glow of a fire in some of the stores signalling that they were open. 

“How did you find clothes for me?” Katara asked Zuko, pressing herself into him more as they continued walking deeper into the village.

“Snuck into one of the stores,” Zuko explained slowly, looking around the wooden fixtures, trying to find somewhere to duck into. “The shopkeeper was out back and I saw the clothes. Just grabbed them and ran.”

“Hmm,” Katara hummed, looking around herself. 

Suddenly, to their right, a door banged open, causing Zuko and Katara to jump. 

“Hey, you kids!” someone called out, a woman by the sounds of it. “We’re in the middle of a storm, what are you doing?”

Thunder boomed overhead, but Zuko replied calmly. “Just finding some shelter.”

“Well, come in here then,” the woman stated, motioning with her hand for Zuko and Katara to follow her. 

“Can we trust her?” Katara whispered to Zuko as he led Katara towards the store.

“We’re going to have to,” he replied quietly, as they had just made it to the door.

The woman stood aside, pointing with her hand for the two strays to enter. Inside was small and cozy, fruits and vegetables lining the shelves. Potted flowers and tea leaves were scattered along low tables. When they were inside, the woman shut the door and looked at Zuko and Katara, placing her hands on her hips.

“What are two young people like you doing out in a storm?” she asked them, raising a thin, grey eyebrow.

Now that they were inside, Katara was able to get a better look at the store owner. She was about Katara’s height, her grey hair pulled back into a topknot like those worn by other Fire Nationals. She was older, though perhaps not as old as her Gran Gran. 

“We were traveling,” Zuko explained, shaking his arm away from Katara gently. She hadn’t realized how tightly she was holding him until he tried to pull away. “Our boat went down in the water and we were lucky enough to escape with our lives.”

The woman huffed. “Swam all the way back, did you?”

“More like the waves carried us,” Katara stated, trying to avoid looking at Zuko. She would not break, she would not show fear, she would not show weakness.

“Any other survivors?” the woman asked, removing her hands from her hips, but her eyes narrowed as she looked solely at Katara.

“No, ma’am,” Katara answered, bowing her head in sorrow. 

“Hm, you were all fools for trying to brace a storm then,” the woman told them, finally moving away from the door and past Katara and Zuko towards her small counter. “You two are lucky you didn’t go down with the rest of the crew.”

“We’re just desperate to get home,” Katara continued, eyes following the old woman. 

“Where is that?” the woman asked, once again raising a thin eyebrow at Katara. 

Katara went to answer, but Zuko interrupted. “Ma’inka Island. Just east of Capital Island.”

“Nobles are you?” the woman scoffed, shaking her head.

“No, just two humble workers,” Zuko continued, elbowing Katara in the ribs when the woman looked away. “Do you think you can tell us where we are?”

“Gangjin,” the woman answered simply. “We’re in the southern islands, if that helps you. But you’re not leaving here until the storm lets up.”

“Of course,” Zuko replied, nodding at the old woman. “We just have friends waiting for us, and we’re sure they are worried.”

“Humph,” the woman grunted, placing her hands on the counter and studying the two young adults in front of her. Her lips formed a thin line as her eyes bore into them, and Katara almost cowered, but Zuko stared back. His hood was still up, but his scar, so prominent and angry against his pale skin, was clearly an indicator of who he was. The woman paid no mind to this though. “What are your names?”

“I’m Lee,” Zuko answered, shifting slightly on his feet. “And this is -”

“Jun,” Katara answered, giving the older woman what she hoped was a kind, tentative smile. She missed how Zuko tensed only somewhat at her chosen name.

“Name’s Miho,” the woman, Miho, told them, pointing to herself. “This here is my shop, though as you can see, there have been no customers because of the storm.”

“If we had any money, we would surely be your first patrons of the day,” Katara told her honestly. 

Miho squinted at Katara, then offered her a small smile. “I suppose you would, wouldn’t you? But I assume you need a place to stay until this storm lets up?”

“That’s the plan,” Zuko stated, “do you know of any inns?”

“This village is too small for inns,” Miho explained, waving her hand in front of her. “We don’t even have an official name. No, you two can stay with me.”

“Oh, that’s very generous of you,” Katara exclaimed, blinking at the old woman, “but, like I said, we have any money, we couldn’t possibly -”

“Nonsense,” Miho interrupted, huffing at Katara. “I’m not about to let two kids almost kill themselves again just to get home. Pay me back by doing some chores around the shop, I don’t care.”

“Well, thank you,” Zuko stated, sighing. “I think we can agree to that.”

Miho huffed again. “Yes, well, it’s almost dark, and since no one is coming in, I suppose I can show you where I live. Let me just close up here.”

Zuko and Katara stood awkwardly in the middle of the room as Miho hustled around them, gathering the spoiled fruits and vegetables (for there were multiple) to dispose of in the back. Once she was out back away from where they could be heard, Katara turned to Zuko.

“Again, you think we can trust her?” Katara whispered, just in case Miho had better hearing than they assumed. “Zuko, she could have taken one look at you and assumed who you were.”

“You don’t think I know that, Katara?” he hissed, bowing his head closer to her. “She could be out back notifying someone of our presence right now.”

“So, what do we do?” Katara asked, straining her hearing to listen for Miho’s return. 

Zuko sighed. “Hope we found one of the good ones.”

“Hope -” Katara scoffed, but Zuko cut her off, grabbing her wrist in his hand to stop her. Miho walked back into the room, wiping her hands on her apron carefully. She looked up at Zuko and Katara, her eyes focused on Zuko’s grip on Katara’s wrist, but she didn’t say anything. 

Zuko let go of Katara quickly, before turning towards Miho. “We’re ready whenever you are.”

“Follow me, please,” Miho told them, motioning with her hand for the unlikely pair to follow her. 

Outside, she locked the door of the shop, though it seemed in vain as the tiny village was still empty. Miho was surprisingly fast, leading them through the village, towards the outskirts, holding her apron above her head as a way to keep the rain off her. Her house lay just on the outskirts of town, the only one for a long while. 

“It’s lonely,” she told them as she opened the door, “but I don’t mind.”

She let Zuko and Katara go in first, right into the tiny kitchen area. A low table in the middle with a few cushions surrounding it. Just beyond, a tiny living area as if once used for entertaining company. Miho entered the room, walking past Katara and Zuko and motioning for them to follow her again. She led them towards a set of stairs, stalking up ahead of them.

“There is only one room up here,” Miho explained to them as they followed her. “Used to be my room, actually, but then my daughter ran off and joined the Fire Nation Army and my husband went and died on me. Since then, I found I didn’t need a bigger room.”

Katara and Zuko glanced at each other, but didn’t say anything. Once upstairs on the small landing, Miho opened the door to the bedroom and motioned for Zuko and Katara to enter, which they did. Inside, a bed, big enough for two, sat pushed against the wall. A small dresser sat opposite, a candle, half burned, on top. Beside that, a tattered rocking chair that was rocking to and fro as the harsh wind shook the house. A shattered mirror hung above the dresser, but neither paid any mind to that. 

“Well, if you need me,” Miho told them, about to walk out, “I’m right down stairs.”

“Actually,” Zuko cut in before Miho could leave. Miho paused and raised an eyebrow at him in question. “Do you happen to have another blanket?”

Without saying anything, Miho nodded and walked out, her footsteps receding down the stairs.

“Why do you need another blanket?” Katara asked, settling down on the bed, her muscles still sore from overexertion. 

“I’ll sleep on the floor,” Zuko told her with a shrug. He placed the bag containing Katara’s Water Tribe clothes on the ground, pushing it with his foot towards her. “Here, hide this under the bed, just in case.”

Katara did what she was told just as Miho returned with the spare blanket. As she handed it to Zuko, he thanked her kindly. 

“Yes, yes, enough with the thank yous,” she told him, rubbing her hands together. “My room is just downstairs, by the washroom. Holler if you need me.” 

With that, she left Zuko and Katara alone, closing the door firmly behind her. 

“I don’t think she’s someone we need to be wary of,” Zuko said finally, removing the hood from his head and shrugging off the cloak. He tossed it towards the chair, missing it a tad. With a click of his tongue, he went over and placed it on the back of the rocking chair. 

“How do you know?” Katara asked him, scooting herself further on the bed so that she sat in the middle, crossing her legs as she watched Zuko pace around the room.

“Did you hear the malice in her voice when she mentioned her daughter?” Zuko asked, placing the blanket Miho gave him on the floor. “Hey, pass me a pillow, will you?”

Katara grabbed one of the two pillows and threw it at Zuko, who caught it with ease. “So? Maybe she’s mad her daughter left her?” 

“Maybe,” Zuko replied, settling down on the floor. Katara thought she heard a crack of joints as he sat. “But it definitely didn’t sound all warm and bubbly.”

“There could be plenty of reasons as to why she was upset,” Katara told him, finally feeling the fatigue hit her. Though she napped earlier, she was still exhausted, and more than an hour of sleep would help her. She moved to the top of the bed, kicking the thin blanket aside to settle underneath it. 

“Maybe,” Zuko mused from the floor below her. “I think we can trust her though.”

“Since when have you been such a good judge of character?” Katara asked, more out of spite than she intended for. 

“I guess you make a fair point,” Zuko conceded, the sleep in his voice heavy. “Then again, you’re not one to talk are you? You trusted me once, and see where they got us?”

Katara sighed. “Yeah, see where that got us.”

“Alone in a room, somewhere in the Fire Nation with a storm going outside, with nowhere to go,” Zuko teased lightly. When Katara snorted, his voice turned serious. “I - I’m sorry for bringing that up.”

“Hm,” Katara hummed, gripping the blanket around her. She closed her eyes, seeing her hand resting upon Zuko’s face, her fingers brushing his scar, her thumb resting on his lips. 

“You still have every reason to hate me,” Zuko said softly, as if nervous to even broach the subject further.

“I don’t hate you, Zuko,” Katara sighed, equally as nervous. “I just - I need more time to figure it out, okay?”

“Yes,” Zuko replied, sounding relieved. “I’m tired and I have a feeling Miho is going to work us to the bone the next couple of days.”

“I don’t doubt it,” Katara stated, eyes still closed. “Good night, Zuko.”

“Good night, Katara,” he replied. 

Though both of them were tired, neither fell asleep right away. Instead, they both laid on perspective locations, finding sleep eluding the both of them. 

Katara kept seeing Yon Rha’s face, the way his eyes went blank and the light of his life as it left him. And that absolutely terrified her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's fun slowly starting to build up the trust between Katara and Zuko, and I'm playing around with him being the first one to open up to her. Especially since technically she was vulnerable around him first. Though while Zuko is open more emotionally, and he does so consciously, Katara is more hesitant. With her, it's the physical touches they share, especially ones where Katara just does so instinctively. 
> 
> Anyways, I get into this habit of making OCs and then getting horribly attached to them, so I hope you all like Miho because she's already my favorite.


	5. ashes of ash

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually have chapters 6 and 7 completely written, but I need to go back and obviously reread and edit both. I'm trying to practice some self-restraint and wait to post the chapters haha. 
> 
> Also, if you cannot tell from this chapter, I absolutely love Miho and I wish her all the best. Anyways, enjoy this Zuko centered chapter.

Zuko laid on the floor staring up at the ceiling, his nightmares jolting him awake long before sunrise. He listened as Katara tossed and turned on the bed next to him, the faintest muttering coming from her lips. The nightmares, he figured, must be persistent, as this was now the third one he heard her having. 

He wasn’t an idiot, he knew Katara still didn’t trust him and was still struggling to figure out exactly how she was feeling. Not just that, he knew Katara was pushing her feelings towards Yon Rha down, pushing them away as a way to avoid her actions. Honestly, Zuko was not surprised by what Katara had done. He remembered staring at her in awe as she relished in his death, but he knew the adrenaline of her actions would wear off soon and force her to face reality. 

Despite the fact that he knew that she was struggling, that he could call her bluff at any moment, Zuko decided he was not going to push Katara any more. Learning to trust someone after they hurt you was a slow process, one that took time, and Zuko respected that. He didn’t just respect Katara, but he respected the boundaries that she was setting for herself. If she didn’t feel the need to talk about her feelings with Zuko, then he was not going to force himself on her. Though while Katara kept herself guarded, a wall built around her heart, Zuko found himself slowly opening himself up to her, the wall around his own heart crumbling bit by bit. Maybe it was the kindness she had shown him in the catacombs creeping its way back to him.

“No,” Katara muttered in her sleep. “No, please, don’t take them.”

Zuko couldn’t help wondering what she was dreaming about. So badly he wanted to get up off the floor and sit next to her, run his hand along her hair and comfort her, assure her that he was here for her. But what would he be thinking? He and Katara were not like that, and the last time he had woken her up from a nightmare she had snapped at him. 

As he laid there, still staring up at the ceiling above him, he couldn’t stop thinking about the waterbender who laid in the bed. She was powerful, yes, but more powerful than Zuko had thought her to be. Not that he assumed she was any less powerful than she was, especially since she had beaten him countless times when they fought. But his thoughts kept going back to the captain of Southern Raiders, the way Katara was somehow… controlling his every move. Zuko could still see the clear determination in her eyes as the captain bowed to her every whim. He wanted to ask her about it, ask her what she had done to the man, but he found himself anxious. Already he was experiencing a side of Katara that she had hidden away for so long, and their relationship was fragile enough as it was. 

“Stop, please,” she muttered again, but Zuko could still hear the terror in her voice. 

He debated waking her up, but soon Katara’s mutterings stopped, her even breathing filling the room. The rain still poured down, the air pounding against the shudders on the window, thunder booming. Occasionally, the crack of lightning lit up the room through the tiny sliver of the shudder. Zuko shivered, not from cold or fear, but from something else he was still trying to grapple with.

He wondered where his uncle was, the wise old man who practically raised him since the age of thirteen. The last time he had seen Uncle Iroh was when Iroh was still imprisoned for “betraying the Fire Nation”. Iroh wasn’t the person who had betrayed those he loved though; no, it was Zuko who had done that, and he had regretted his actions every day since. Now he was left with a sense of bitterness in his heart, and the taste of regret on his tongue. If only Zuko had gotten to Iroh before he broke out of prison, then maybe, just maybe, everything would have turned out differently. But then again, would Zuko still be Aang’s firebending master if Iroh had appeared at the Western Air Temple with him? Would Zuko be here, in this tiny village on some unimportant island, with Katara sleeping in the bed next to him? Perhaps, but Zuko’s not sure. 

Shadows danced across the room, and despite the fact that the sun was hidden behind the clouds, Zuko could feel its power in his veins, the way it slowly made its way towards the sky. Zuko loved the sunrise; he loved the way the sun would shine with its rosy fingers reaching for the clouds above. When he was younger, he and his mother always found one day a month to wake up extra early and find a place to watch the sunrise. Zuko cherished those days where he got to sit closely with his mother, her warm embrace soothing Zuko in the cool air. A sudden pang in his chest, caused by the realization of missing his mother, slipped through him. 

Knowing that he was not going to sleep anymore, especially with the sun slowly making its way towards the sky, Zuko pushed the thin blanket off of him and sat up, stretching his arms above his head. He bent his arm at the elbow, reaching for his back, feeling his tense muscles pull. With his opposite hand, he pushed his arm to the side, feeling the way his shoulder loosened slowly. He repeated the motion with his opposite arm before standing up, feeling the way his joints cracked after spending so many nights on an uncomfortable surface. Before leaving the room, he took one last glance at Katara, noticing the way she slept facing away from Zuko. His heart skipped a beat, but Zuko shook his head and carefully, quietly, made his way out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

At the bottom of the stairs, he went to the small washroom to freshen up. Rinsing his hands, he glanced up at the small mirror, not shattered like the one that resided in the room he and Katara were sharing. Zuko couldn’t help but stare at himself, specifically the prominent scar on the left side of his face. He raised a hand to it, feeling its rough edges, the raised skin beneath his finger tips. Despite the fact that he’s had it for so long, there were times when Zuko could barely recognize himself. Then again, Zuko couldn’t remember a time when he  _ didn’t  _ have this mark of ignominy on face. 

Another pang in his chest, this time caused by the memory of Katara’s fingers pressed up against the bottom of his scar, her thumb brushing her lips. He had shuddered at her touch, the mere exchange had felt so intimate to Zuko at the time, and he couldn’t help but crave her touch once more. 

_ No, _ he thought to himself.  _ No, you lost that privilege. She’ll never touch you again.  _

With one last look in the mirror, Zuko left the washroom and made his way to the tiny kitchen where Miho was already getting breakfast ready. She turned when she heard Zuko, giving him a slight nod of her head before focusing once more on her task. Zuko just sat down at the table, taking a cushion as far from Miho as possible. 

“Morning, Lee,” she stated, using the spark rocks to create a small fire. She placed the kettle on the flames to let the water boil. If Zuko was willing to expose himself, he would have offered to make the fire himself, but he kept his mouth shut. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yes, thank you,” Zuko replied, feeling a crick in his neck as he said this. Wincing, he stretched his neck to the left, feeling the tendons pull, letting out a small gasp of pain. 

Miho turned slightly, a thin eyebrow raised. “Doesn’t sound like you did.”

“I, uh, slept on the floor,” Zuko admitted sheepishly, feeling his face go red as Miho just hummed in reply. “It was fine, though, I’ve slept in worse places, if I’m being honest.”

“You and your girl having a lovers’ quarrel?” Miho asked nonchalantly, slicing up pieces of fruit so skillfully she might as well put Katara to shame. 

Zuko blinked, staring at the old woman’s back. “Wh-what? No, no, she’s not - we’re not - no.”

When Miho turned around again, she placed the bowl of fruit on the table and slid it towards Zuko. She placed one hand on her hip, her knife still in the opposite hand as she waved it at Zuko. “Now, that’s not what I see.”

“We’re just friends,” Zuko told her, his cheeks most likely the same shade as his scar. 

_ Agni, Zuko, get it together,  _ he chided himself,  _ it’s just Katara _ . 

Just Katara.

“Hm,” Miho hummed before placing the knife on the counter and pouring out the water for the tea. “Jun is still asleep then?”

“Yes,” Zuko answered, taking a slice of ash banana in his hand. “She doesn’t like to wake up early.”

“No kidding,” Miho replied, her voice somewhat flat. Zuko watched her, still unable to figure this woman out. Clearly, she had to be kind if she was willing to take in two kids who washed up on the beach in the middle of the storm. But she was also a bit rough around the edges, quick to judge. 

Miho placed two cups of tea on the table before settling down on a cushion across from Zuko. She slid one of the cups of tea over to him, which he took appreciatively. It was warm in his hand, and when he tasted it, he realized that it was not as good as Iroh’s, but it was adequate enough to melt the chill on his bones. 

“So, what are your plans for getting home?” Miho asked carefully, peering at Zuko over her cup as she drank. “Two kids like you with no money and little belongings seems difficult.”

“We’ll figure it out,” Zuko assured the older woman, placing his cup back on the table slowly. “Like I said, we have friends waiting for us, and they might come looking for us if we’re gone too long.”

“It would be foolish if they did,” Miho stated, shaking her head. “They would end up like you and Jun: washed up on a beach with nowhere to go.”

Zuko considered that. He knew Miho was right, of course, it would be foolish for the others to try and come looking for them in the middle of a storm like this. Aang was the Avatar, yes, but the risk would not be worth it. 

“How  _ did  _ you and Jun end up on an island like this though?” Miho pressed, staring at Zuko. She did not look unkind, nor did she look untrustworthy. To be fair, she was probably just as weary of Zuko and Katara as they were of her. 

“Jun and I have been traveling,” Zuko explained easily. “She wanted to visit her uncle nearby, and on our journey home… well, you know that part.”

Miho didn’t look totally convinced, but she said nothing. Instead, she nodded gravely, lifting her cup of tea to her lips once more. Zuko mimicked her, still trying to adjust to the vast difference between his uncle’s famous tea and the one Miho had made. 

Just then, a loud knock at the door caused Zuko to jump in his seat. Miho, on the other hand, looked completely calm, as if unsurprised by this.

“Open up!” a gruff, male voice called. “We have some questions.”

Miho must have seen the panicked look on Zuko’s face, because she motioned for him to leave the kitchen, pointing towards the stairs that lead to his room. As Zuko ran out, Miho grabbed his cup and placed it on the counter out of sight. 

At the landing, the bedroom door opened and Katara just stepped over the threshold when Zuko grabbed hold of her, pulling her close to him and placing a hand over her mouth. She went to struggle, but Zuko just held her tighter. The door opened below them and Katara stopped struggling.

“Yes?” came Miho’s rough voice, clearly unamused by whoever was at the door. 

“We’ve been instructed to question everyone within a ten mile radius,” came the gruff voice that knocked on the door. 

“And  _ why  _ is that?” Miho asked hotly, and Zuko couldn’t help but be impressed by the small woman hosting him and Katara. 

“A renowned general of the Southern Raiders was found killed just outside of his own village shortly after nightfall last night,” the man informed Miho.

Katara squeaked in Zuko’s grip, and Zuko could feel her whole body begin to shake. At least now they knew they were back where they started; that would make getting to Ember Island a tad bit easier. 

“And which renowned general was this?” Miho spat, venom in her voice.

“You watch yourself!” the man warned, but Miho must have stood her ground. “General Yon Rha, if you so desperately needed to know. He was the one responsible for eradicating the last Southern Waterbender.”

“Because killing for sport surely requires people to worship men,” Miho scoffed. 

Though she was silent, Zuko could feel Katara’s body racking with sobs. 

“Shh,” Zuko whispered as softly as he could, his hand still over Katara’s mouth. She nodded slightly, pressing herself against Zuko. 

“So why are you here?” Miho asked again. 

“Again, you better watch yourself,” the man warned Miho once more, malice in his voice. “You may be an old lady, but that won’t stop me from kicking the shit out of you.”

“I would very much like to see you try,” Miho challenged, and Zuko could almost see her take a step towards the man with confidence. 

“Don’t tempt me,” he replied angrily. “If you see anything - or anyone - suspicious, you let us know. Though with your attitude, I’m adding you to the list of suspicious figures.”

“Do what you want, I don’t care,” Miho replied. “Now, leave my house at once. I have no need of soldiers coming into my space and telling me what to do.”

Another huff, an exchange of goodbyes, though they weren’t very pleasant, and the door closed firmly. 

“You can come out now,” Miho called up. 

Katara elbowed Zuko in the ribs causing Zuko to snap out of his trance and release her. When she looked up at him, Zuko noticed her red rimmed eyes and tear stained cheeks. Without thinking, he lifted a hand towards her face, placing his palm against her cheek and gently wiping away a lone tear that trekked down her face. She closed her eyes at his touch, leaning into his hand as if it were a natural occurrence between them.

“Hey, it’ll be okay,” he told her softly, Katara taking a deep breath in.

“They know,” she whispered back, opening her eyes, blue meeting gold. “They know.”

“Well, if we stick with Miho, we’ll be fine,” Zuko assured her, finally removing his hand from her face. She seemed to deflate once he pulled his hand away from her, but she recovered quickly, shoulders tense once more. “Hey, safe with me, remember?”

Katara just nodded, taking in another breath.

“Go wash your face,” Zuko instructed her, turning her around so that she faced the stairs. “We don’t want Miho to worry.”

Zuko then followed Katara down the stairs, but when they reached the bottom, Katara went into the washroom and Zuko went back to the kitchen to find Miho sitting back down on her cushion, sipping her tea as if nothing happened.

“Jun finally woke up?” she asked as Zuko took his seat again, his tea back in front of him.

“Yes, she just needed to freshen up, then she’ll join us,” Zuko answered, wrapping his hands around the cup, thinking of his uncle once more. 

Miho nodded before standing, grabbing the extra cup of tea and placing it on the table, sliding it towards Zuko. “That’s for Jun.”

Zuko placed the cup at the spot next him. He wasn’t sure if Katara would actually sit next to him, but something deep in his gut told him that she would. There was a shift between them, a shift that turned their previous relationship - friendship - acquaintanceship - upside down. There was no word for what he and Katara were; just two people trying to find their way back home. 

The washroom door opened and Katara came walking into the kitchen, noticing the cup of tea waiting on the table for her. She sunk down into the cushion next to Zuko, wrapping her hands around the cup and bringing it close to her as if it were an anchor keeping her steady. 

“You heard all that, I assume?” Miho asked, studying Katara carefully, her head tilted to the side as she watched the young woman take a slow sip of tea.

“Yes, every word,” Zuko answered, grabbing an apple and placing it by Katara. “You need to eat, by the way.”

“Not hungry,” muttered Katara, hands still wrapped firmly around her cup. Zuko didn’t argue, but he did push the apple closer to Katara, just in case.

Miho watched the interaction thoughtfully, her lips twitching when Zuko finally looked over at her. 

“I guess we’re just… shaken up,” Zuko told Miho honestly, rubbing the back of his neck as Katara’s eyes went glassy once more. “We don’t want any trouble, we assumed we found somewhere safe to stay.”

“If you had nothing to do with this, then you should be fine,” Miho stated simply with a small shrug of her shoulder. At Katara’s sharp intake of breath, Miho looked over at her, but Zuko cut in once more.

“We didn’t,” Zuko told her firmly, causing Miho to look back at Zuko. “But being somewhere that’s occupied by soldiers makes me a bit uneasy that’s all.”

“I don’t understand why they’re searching for his killer anyways,” Miho scoffed, fiddling with her empty tea cup. 

“You don’t care?” Zuko asked, watching as Miho let out an empty laugh.

“Care? Agni,  _ no, _ why should I?” Miho asked, shaking her head. “Oh, I heard all about Yon Rha, the man who led the Southern Raiders for however many years. Nine? Ten? I don’t know.”

“What did they say about him?” Katara asked quietly, her eyes solely on Miho.

The older woman turned to Katara, her usually sharp eyes going soft at the younger girl’s clear anxiety. “Oh, he was called a hero. The man who disposed of the last Southern waterbender, the man who allowed the Fire Lord’s plan of world domination to be one step clearer. Personally, I think he was a monster.”

“You do?” Zuko asked before Katara could react.

“Sure,” Miho replied. “A man who kills for sport just because another man told him to? Monsters, every single one of them. Personally, I think he got what he deserved.”

Katara was silent to Zuko’s right, her blue eyes wide as she focused on Miho. It was clear that Katara wanted to say something more, but she kept silent. 

“This war… it’s miserable,” Miho spat, standing up from the table and grabbing her empty cup. 

“But why -” Zuko started, but Miho glared at him, causing him to go silent.

“That’s enough talk for today,” Miho stated firmly. “We’re going to be late if we don’t get a move on. Finish your tea and your breakfast, then we can head out. Jun, I agree with Lee here, you need to eat. So  _ eat. _ ”

Katara did as she was told and grabbed the apple, taking a small bite. She seemed deep in thought, as if mulling over Miho’s words. Zuko could only watch her, though no matter how much he studied her he still found himself lost when it came to her. He remembered how she didn’t recoil at his touch, how she easily sat next to him without even thinking about the implications. No, she doesn’t have to trust him just yet, but he watched as the walls she built around her heart slowly started to break. 


	6. fire in my lungs

Katara felt like she couldn’t breath the whole walk to Miho’s tiny shop in the middle of the village. Everywhere she looked there were Fire Nation soldiers stationed somewhere along the path, and although they looked irked by the rain, none of them said anything about it. With the news that Yon Rha’s killer was being sought after, Katara felt a strange sense of accomplishment as well as fear. On the one hand, she was happy that she made an impression, happy that the people are recognizing that no one is safe from her ire. On the other hand, if she was caught… well, she didn’t even want to think about that option. 

As they walked, she felt Zuko’s hand brush up against hers, and when she looked up at him, his face was covered by his hood, so she could not see his expression. He might not have done it on purpose, but there was a small part of her that hoped that he was reaching out to her. This morning, when he wrapped a strong arm around her waist, holding her close to him as Miho talked to the soldier downstairs, Katara felt safe. Zuko had told her over and over again that she was safe with him despite her blatant distrust of him in the beginning, but the way he held her as she cried, wiped away her tears from her eye, made her feel like that maybe being with him in this situation wasn’t all that terrible. 

When they reached the shop, Miho unlocked the door and motioned for Zuko and Katara to head in first. Before closing the door, she took one last look around the main path, counting the soldiers under breath. Katara stood in the middle of the room shivering, though she wasn’t sure if it was from the rain or anxiety. Meanwhile, Zuko stood steadfastly next to her, watching as Miho closed the door and lit a candle in the window as a way to tell the rest of the town that she was open. Katara took note that she had used spark rocks; Miho wasn’t a firebender. How did Katara miss that last night?

“Hopefully we get some customers, today,” Miho gruffed, making her way to the counter and wrapping her apron around her waist. Once behind the counter, she looked back and forth between Zuko and Katara, a serious look on her face. “Now, what can I have you two do that is actually worth something?”

“I can help you clean?” Katara offered, pointing to a dusty table by the wall where flowers drooped. 

“Uh, I can stock?” Zuko suggested, rubbing the back of his neck. “If, you know, there is anything  _ to  _ stock?”

Miho nodded. “I usually get my fruits and vegetables from Kimi right down the path. If you go to him now, he should give you my delivery. Just tell him I sent you.”

“Where?” Zuko asked, already heading towards the door. 

Miho quickly gave Zuko the directions and Zuko was out the door with a flash of lightning. Katara winced when the lightning flashed through the sky, but it seemed like both Miho and Zuko were used to it. 

“Scared of a little lightning?” Miho asked her, chuckling lightly, leaning over the counter. 

“No,” Katara replied defensively. “It just took me by surprise, that’s all.”

Miho huffed. “Well, hopefully it doesn’t distract you from cleaning. Come out back with me and we can get the broom and the duster. Now that you say it, this place could use some serious cleaning.”

Soon, Katara was hard at work dusting and sweeping around the shop. She twisted cobwebs around her finger, sliding them into the bin that Miho set aside for her. Every table was dusted so that it almost shone, and Katara made sure to water every flower she came across. When Zuko returned with the fruits and vegetables, he and Miho got to work stocking the shelves as Katara began cleaning the floor with the brush Miho provided for her. 

Even though her heart was pounding in her chest, and her thoughts were moving at a thousand miles a minute, Katara found the work to be soothing, an attempt to keep her thoughts at bay. No longer was she thinking about Yon Rha or the fact that the Fire Nation army was apparently looking for her. No longer was she thinking about the others who were probably worried out of their minds about her and Zuko. Not only that, but she was no longer thinking about the way Zuko looked at her this morning, with so much tenderness and sadness in his eyes, as if Katara was cracking in front of him.

Katara felt each crack slowly making its way through her body, but there was nothing to fill them up. Usually, Katara would find it easy to fill a crack, but this time she was struggling to stop herself from breaking. Currently, Katara was able to keep herself together, find a way to slow the cracks making their way up her body. To be honest, she wasn’t exactly sure what was keeping her from falling apart, especially because now that every time she closed her eyes she could see Yon Rha’s bloody corpse lying in the mud. 

Shaking her head, Katara pushed the bucket to the side of the room and dropped the brush in the water, causing some of the dirty water to splash on the clean floor. She looked over at Miho, hoping the old woman hadn’t seen it, but she was over at the counter counting the money in her small chest. Her lips were a thin line and her brows were furrowed, and Katara could tell the older woman was displeased. If only there was some way to help Miho, but Katara knew that this was not like the town of Jang Hui where Katara had donned the disguise of the Painted Lady. 

Katara noticed a plant drooping over in its pot, the pliable stem almost completely broken. Frowning slightly, Katara went over to the pot and picked it up just as the door slammed open. 

“Oh, it’s you again,” Miho deadpanned from the counter, slamming the small chest shut and placing it on the shelf under the counter. 

Katara turned her head slightly to the left, noticing three Fire Nation soldiers making their way into the shop. There was one in particular who looked younger than the rest, maybe the same age as Zuko. As he walked by her, Katara could feel his eyes on her, the way they swept over her body with a satisfied grin on his face. Turning away quickly, Katara cursed to herself, wishing she could send a waterwhip over to his smug face. 

“We’re just checking in all the shops,” the leader stated, staring Miho down. “It gives me no pleasure to come face to face with you once again, old lady.”

“Feeling’s mutual,” Miho replied curtly, and Katara bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from laughing at Miho’s spunk. 

Risking it, Katara turned around just a bit to look at Zuko who was standing opposite of her by the shelves he just recently reorganized with Miho. With his arms crossed, he watched the soldiers gang up on Miho, and although his hood was now up, Katara could see how his eyes narrowed as he watched the soldiers’ every move. 

“When we visited you this morning, we told you to tell us if you’ve seen anyone suspicious,” the leader continued, glancing first at Zuko, then at Katara. When his eyes fell on her, Katara stuck her chin in the air, watching as he grinned at her the same way the younger soldier had earlier when they walked in. 

“I may be old, but my memory is perfectly fine,” Miho retorted, snorting. 

“Then who are they?” the leader snapped, motioning at both Zuko and Katara. 

The younger soldier looked over at Katara and winked, but Katara just narrowed her eyes at him. 

“My nephew and his betrothed,” Miho answered with a wave of her hand. 

The pot slipped through Katara’s hands, shattering on the ground.  _ Shit.  _ She felt her face flush as she looked over at Miho apologetically.

Miho just frowned, placing her hands on her hips. “Jun, that was my favorite pot, be careful.” 

“I can help her clean it, Aunt Miho, no worries,” Zuko said quickly, rushing over to Katara and bending down on the ground next to her, picking up pieces of the broken pot. He lowered his voice just enough for Katara to hear. “Hey, keep it together.” 

“How long are they here for?” the leader asked, his tone bored. 

“Till the storm lets up then they return home,” Miho replied, equally bored. “Now, can my family and I get back to work, or are you going to sit here all day?” 

“Watch yourself,” the soldier warned, his voice low and even. Miho just stared back at him, clearly unafraid. 

The leader waved for the other two to follow and they made their way out of the shop. Katara looked up to see the younger soldier no longer staring at her, but at Zuko, a determined look on his face. 

“Hurry, Hiratao,” the leader barked, causing the young soldier to jump to attention and rush out of the shop, closing the door swiftly behind him. 

Katara let out a sigh of relief and stood up, turning to look at Miho. Next to her, Zuko stood up as well, holding his hand out for Katara to place her broken pieces with his. 

“We’re not together,” Katara told Miho as she handed her pieces to Zuko. “I don’t know why you told him that.”

“Yes, Lee told me this morning,” Miho commented, grabbing the broom and making her way towards Katara. 

“Then why -” Katara began, but Miho just handed her the broom, motioning for Katara to stop.

“Not sure if you noticed that young soldier staring at you,” Miho stated, looking up at Zuko, who just nodded in agreement. 

“So? I can handle myself,” Katara told them both, beginning to sweep up the smaller pieces she and Zuko were unable to pick up with their fingers.

“We know that,” Zuko told her, shaking his head. “But maybe Miho had a point?”

“And what was that exactly?” Katara snapped, staring at Zuko.

“Jun, you may not like this, but some men seem to think that women were only placed on this earth to do their bidding,” Miho explained, venom in her voice. “And some men think that women owe them, and because of that, some seem to think that there is this code to live by. So, if you say a woman ‘belongs’ to another man, then they back off.”

“That’s utterly disgusting,” Katara stated, horrified by Miho’s explanation.

“Didn’t say it wasn’t.” Miho shrugged, as if desensitized by what was happening around her. She grabbed the bucket of water off the floor and made her way towards the back. “Finish cleaning that up, we’re heading home early today.” 

When Miho disappeared into the back room, Zuko placed a hand on Katara’s arm, gently turning her to face him. “Hey, I know you’re not happy with it, but it might be a good idea?”

“What, me being your property?” Katara snapped, finishing with the rest of the tiny pieces and placing them in a small pile on her feet. Zuko’s hand fell from her arm.

“That’s not what I meant,” Zuko replied, shaking his head. “I just mean it might help to get the soldiers to back off -”

“I can handle myself,” Katara interrupted, leaning the broom up against one of the shelves and looking at Zuko, crossing her arms in front of her. 

“Dammit, Katara, that’s not what I meant!” Zuko yelled, causing Katara to flinch. He ran his hands over his face, groaning as he did. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you like that. Or raise my voice.”

“Well you did,” Katara stated, pressing her arms to her chest.

Zuko studied her, opening his mouth as if to retort, but he just shook his head. 

“What did you mean then?” Katara asked, checking to see if Miho was still in the back. 

“I meant it’s a good cover story if we need one,” Zuko sighed. “We’re here visiting Miho, but when we tried to leave, our boat went down. We can just adjust what I told Miho this morning.” When Katara gave him a questioning look, he continued, “I told her we were visiting your uncle and on our way home, our boat went down.”

“So replace my uncle with Miho,” Katara said, thinking it over. She had to admit, maybe this plan was a good idea. 

Zuko was about to answer when Miho came back in, wrapping her knuckles on the counter. She addressed Katara. “The pot all cleaned up?”

“Yes, sorry,” Katara replied, bending down and collecting as many tiny pieces as she could. She threw them in the bin, watching as they drifted down on top of the bigger pieces. When she went to move the broom, Miho just shook her head.

“Leave it,” Miho told her. “We can deal with it tomorrow. I want to get home and avoid any more run-ins with these soldiers.”

Katara and Zuko both agreed, so the trio made their way back towards Miho’s house. As they walked through the village, Zuko wrapped an arm around Katara’s shoulders, pulling her close to him. She noticed the soldiers staring at them, the way Zuko held Katara tightly in his grip. Zuko just stared right back as if daring them to try and get through him. Katara could take care of herself, but she was thankful once again to have Zuko with her at this very moment. 

Back at the house, Miho excused herself to her room, leaving Katara and Zuko alone in the tiny kitchen. They sat across from each other, neither really knowing what to say.

“Hey, you know how you yelled at me earlier?” Katara asked, watching Zuko raise his lone eyebrow at her.

“Yes, and I feel bad enough as it is about it,” Zuko replied. “Why? What are you getting at?”

“Well, you apologized to me and - well - I realized something,” Katara told him, feeling herself flush as Zuko kept staring at her. “I never apologized to you. For yelling at you, I mean.” 

“Why now?” Zuko asked her, tilting his head to the side. 

“Because that wasn’t fair,” Katara said, tracing her fingers on the table, feeling the uneven wood beneath her fingertips. “I’ve been yelling and snapping at you for so long, and you’ve been nothing but patient with me. So, I’m sorry for always yelling at you.”

“You had every right to yell and snap at me,” Zuko assured her. “But thank you, I appreciate that.”

“You don’t have to forgive me,” Katara told him, making eye contact with him. There was that expression again, the one that was so unreadable that Katara was still unsure of what exactly it meant when he looked at her like that. 

“You don’t have to forgive  _ me _ ,” Zuko countered. “But can we agree to talk like normal people from now on? We’re stuck with each other for a bit, and it would be nice to figure everything out together.”

Katara held her hand out to him. “Deal.”

Zuko smiled and took her hand in hers, his hand warm as he held her tightly. “Deal.”

* * *

Sokka sat in the middle of Appa’s saddle, Toph sitting on one side and Suki on the other. Aang sat on Appa’s head at the reins, guiding the sky bison further towards their destination. 

“Ember Island is right here,” Sokka stated, pointing at a spot on the map: a smaller island close to Capital Island. “So if we head there, maybe Katara and Zuko will already be waiting for us.”

“Depends,” Toph stated, crossing her arms as she considered Sokka. “If the storm was really bad, they might be anywhere in the Fire Nation. And if they’re in those islands farthest away from Capital Island, they might not have the necessary resources needed to get back.”

“What do you mean?” Suki asked. 

“The farther you are from Capital Island, the less well off you are,” Sokka explained, remembering the small town they found Hama in and the small village of Jang Hui. “It’s like the Fire Lord doesn’t care about the rest of his citizens, only if  _ he  _ benefits from the spoils.”

“That’s war, Sokka,” Suki told him sadly, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

“I still say we go look for them,” Aang said, looking back from Appa’s head, his eyes determined. 

“Calm down, Twinkle Toes, I’m sure they’re fine,” Toph told him, lying on her back and placing her hands behind her head. 

“But remember what we heard?” Aang asked stubbornly. 

Before they began their journey to Ember Island, Aang was able to find a small island just outside the Fire Nation. Sokka snuck into town to see if he could get any information about the storm. He was able to find a willing informant, someone who had just come from one of the southern islands just before the storm hit. According to him, the storm hit the islands hard, with multiple boats going down as soon as they set sail and dozens killed, either by drowning or flooding. 

“Zuko and Katara are tough,” Toph assured Aang. “I know they’re okay.”

“Still…” Sokka started, but Suki’s hand tightened on his shoulder. 

“They’ll be okay,” Suki said soothingly. “We just need to get to Ember Island. Maybe once we’re there, we wait and see what happens. If too much time goes by before they’re back, then maybe we go after them.”

“Yeah, that’s a good plan,” Sokka agreed, placing his hand on top of Suki’s. She gave him a small smile and leaned over to give him a kiss on the cheek. 

“I agree with Suki,” Toph chimed in. “Aang, what about you?”

“I don’t like it,” Aang admitted, turning back around to face front. “But it’s all we have.”

Slowly, Appa continued his trek across the sky, everyone silent as they thought about the next couple of weeks. The comet was only a month away, and without Katara and Zuko… no one wanted to think of the possibilities. 

All they had was hope, and it was starting to run out. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fake dating? 
> 
> ~Fake Dating~


	7. hell of a night

Since Miho had decided to close the shop early, Zuko and Katara had more time on their hands than they knew what to do with. They tried to find some way to fill the time, but Miho didn’t have much in her house. Zuko did what uncle always did when there was nothing to do: make tea. Katara found a collection of stories sitting on a bookshelf in the tiny living area. When she found one that looked interesting, Katara sat on one of the cushions, curling up on the floor as she devoured the story. Without disturbing her, Zuko placed a cup of tea next to her before sitting on his own cushion, leaning up against the wall with his own tea in his hands. 

As he drank, he couldn’t help but watch Katara. Since she was so engrossed in her book, she hadn’t noticed him staring at her, smiling to himself whenever she let out a small gasp of surprise or a grunt of dissatisfaction. At one point, she heard him chuckle and she looked up to see him turning away quickly. He was sure she was going to be mad at him for watching her, mad that he felt the need to insert himself in her personal time, but he was surprised when she smiled at him.

“I never was a silent reader,” she told him, placing the book aside and noticing the tea on the ground next to her. She looked at Zuko, brows furrowed in confusion, but he just shrugged. 

“Figured you would like some,” Zuko said, feeling himself redden as she smiled at him. 

“Yeah, thank you,” Katara replied, picking up the cup and taking a sip. 

“Welcome.” Zuko couldn’t help but watch for her expression, almost expecting her to spit it out and tell him that it tasted disgusting (he wasn’t the best when making tea), but instead, she took her sip and offered him another smile before picking the book back up. 

That was how they spent the next hour: Katara reading her stories and Zuko watching her with fascination as he drank his tea. Every once in a while, Katara would look up at Zuko and give him another small smile before turning her attention back to whatever she was reading. Zuko found his mind wandering, wondering where the others could possibly be. Would they be on their way to Ember Island? Are they still on the tiny island they went to shortly after the Western Air Temple? And what about Appa? Did he find Aang? Or was he lost once more? 

“Lee?” Katara’s voice snapped Zuko out of his stupor. She looked at him, concern in her eyes, as Miho stood above them. “Miho was asking if we could help her make dinner.”

“Oh, yes, sorry,” Zuko said, standing up off of his cushion and looking over at Miho. “I was just lost in thought.”

“I understand, we had a strange day,” Miho replied.

Katara stood up as well, placing the book back on the shelf and following Miho to the kitchen. Just like she had back in the shop, Miho gave Zuko and Katara some tasks to complete as she cooked. While the previous silence between Zuko and Katara had been comfortable, with Miho in the mix Zuko could almost feel the tension start to suffocate him. He couldn’t help but wonder if Miho knew more than she let on, especially with the way she kept glancing sideways at him, her eyes lingering on the scar on his face. Either way, Zuko tried to ignore the tension and continue with whatever it was that Miho gave him.

When they were done, each took their spot at the table, Miho on one side and Zuko and Katara sitting next to each other on the other side. Zuko watched as Katara picked at her rice, moving it side to side in the bowl as if she were trying to make it look like she actually ate some of it. He elbowed her, looking at her bowl pointedly, and Katara sighed, shaking her head. As always, Miho watched the interaction with a watchful eye, but did not say anything about it.

“I heard there are soldiers stationed in every village around the island,” she said instead, her tone careful as she picked up her cup of tea. “Seems like they’re desperate to capture this killer.”

“What if the killer is already gone?” Zuko asked, noting that Katara purposely did not look up at Miho. 

Miho placed the cup down on the table, looking back and forth between her two strays. “Why do I have the feeling that you two had something to do with this?”

“We didn’t,” Katara said, a little too loudly, causing Zuko to elbow her once again. She took a breath and looked Miho in the eye. “We didn’t have anything to do with it. Lee told you this morning, we came to visit my uncle.”

“You can lie to me all you want,” Miho said, this time looking directly at Zuko, her eyes lingering on his scar once more, “but you must know that just because I’m old, doesn’t mean my mind isn’t quick.”

Zuko and Katara exchanged a look, but neither said anything. Katara seemed to have lost her appetite, because she placed her chopsticks down on the table and wrapped her arms around herself. 

“You have nothing to worry about with me,” Miho continued, releasing a sigh as she did. “This war, it’s been hell for everyone here.”

“How so?” Zuko asked, his attention fully on Miho now.

“The further you are from the capital, the less Fire Lord Ozai cares about you,” she explained, shaking her head. “If the island has natural resources he needs to win the war, then he cares, but not about the citizens. If you get in the way, you are marked as insubordinate. You’re either jailed or killed. I think those who are killed have it luckier if I’m being completely honest.”

“And what about Gangjin?” Zuko asked. “How are you affected?”

“We’re small, so we go just under his radar,” Miho told him. “But we get no help at all. For example, if this storm continues any more, this village will flood and we’ll suffer for it. We’ll get no help from anyone. Like I said, if you don’t benefit the war effort, then no one cares about you.”

“I can’t tell if that's positive or negative,” Zuko stated, rubbing the back of his neck. “On the one hand, you escape the imperialism of the rest of the nation, but on the other hand…”

“We’re just another pawn in his game,” Miho finished for him, nodding gravely. “Like I said: war is hell.”

“It reminds me of the tiny village in the middle of the Jang Hui river,” Katara said finally, her voice small. She looked right at Miho, but her mind was far away. “The entire river was polluted due to a factory dumping its contents into it, and the people were suffering. The soldiers didn’t even care that people were sick and dying, they only cared about making weapons.”

“I thought you two were from Ma’inka,” Miho stated, raising a thin eyebrow at Katara. 

Katara turned bright red, but Zuko cut in. “We are, but we travel a lot.”

Miho sighed. “I really hoped by now you two would learn not to lie to me, but I see that you still don’t trust me enough. I understand, but do know that you can stay with me as long as you need.”

“Thank you,” Zuko said, and before Miho could protest, he held up his hand. “You’ve been nothing but kind to us, please just let me say it.” 

“Well, it’s nice not being alone in this house all the time,” Miho told them, giving them a rare smile. “Since my husband died, it’s been a bit lonely.”

“Can I ask you something?” Katara chimed in, moving her rice bowl to the side. It was still full, and Zuko could tell she would not be completing her dinner any time soon.

Miho motioned for her to continue.

“If you hate the war so much, why did your daughter join the army?” Katara asked, brows furrowed in confusion. “Clearly the war effort hasn’t been kind to the people on this island, but your daughter left anyway?”

“That’s a very long story,” Miho explained, but Katara just raised her eyebrows. “My daughter, Kayo, has lived here all her life. She was always headstrong, always talked about leaving the island and doing something better with her life. Of course my husband and I encouraged her, what parent wouldn’t? But she wanted so much more than living here for the rest of her life and working in a shop. A few years ago, when she was about eighteen, the Fire Nation Army occupied the village for a short couple of months.”

“Why?” Zuko asked, taken aback. “You said you often were able to stay out of the Fire Lord’s grasp, what happened?”

“To be honest, we’re not really sure,” Miho admitted. “We think there was a mine close by that no one knew about, and the army was told to get some natural resources, but we were never told the specific reason. They were here one day, then gone the next.”

“What did that have to do with Kayo?” Katara prompted, focused on Miho. 

“Well, she met one of the soldiers,” Miho said, her voice turning bitter. “A young one, much like the one who was staring at you earlier, Jun.”

“He hurt her?” Katara asked, eyes wide.

“No, no, nothing like that,” Miho commented, shaking her head. “He seduced her, that’s for sure. Seduced her with stories about the war effort, all the people he was _helping_ , the battles he’s seen. That boy looked no older than twenty, I highly doubt he actually fought, but I digress.”

“Kayo’s calling had finally come to her,” Zuko realized, a pit forming in his stomach. 

Miho nodded sadly. “Yes. She came home one night all excited, bouncing off the walls, saying she was going to join the army and finally do something great with her life. My husband and I tried to dissuade her, but she wouldn’t listen.”

“She was headstrong,” Katara said, reaching across the table and placing a hand on Miho’s. Miho looked at Katara, her facial expression unreadable, but there was pain in her voice.

“Yes, so headstrong,” Miho continued with a small sniff. “And oh did she _yell_ at us. She finally found her calling, finally found a way to help people. We tried so hard to tell her that the war was not as great as the soldier had made it out to be, that a young woman like her wouldn’t do well in a war, but she didn’t listen. When we woke up the next morning, she was gone. And so were the rest of the soldiers. She must have known they were leaving before we did.”

“Miho, I am so, _so_ sorry,” Katara said softly, gripping Miho’s.

Miho moved her hand out from under Katara’s and stood up quickly, turning so that her back was to Katara and Zuko. “It’s fine. No need to apologize.”

Katara glanced at Zuko who just shrugged. He wasn’t exactly sure what to say to Miho now, but he had a newfound appreciation for the older woman who took them in. Clearly she had suffered in her life, and her hatred for the war became even clearer. 

“I think we’re done eating, yes?” Miho asked, gathering her bowl and cup, keeping her head down so that Zuko and Katara could not see her face.

“We can help you clean up?” Katara offered, standing up herself, going to pick up her own bowl that was still full of rice.

“No, no.” Miho waved her hand and Katara paused. “Just - I can clean. Why don’t you two freshen up or go to bed. We had a long day, and we’re going to have another one tomorrow.” 

“Sure,” Katara replied quietly, pulling Zuko’s sleeve and leading him towards the stairs. He followed obediently, taking one last look at Miho. He heard her sniff quietly, but that was it. Katara stopped at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at Zuko. “Um, I’m going to wash up. I’ll meet you upstairs.”

“Sure, yeah,” Zuko agreed, heading upstairs by himself. 

He kept thinking about Miho’s story, his heart tight in his chest. During his time in the Earth Kingdom, Zuko met plenty of people who were affected negatively by the war. Each of their stories had played a role in Zuko’s critical decision to finally confront his father during Day of Black Sun. When Zuko thought of all the horrors of the war, he had just assumed that the only people who were against it were those not in the Fire Nation. 

Sitting on the bed, he thought of Song and her mother, the kind women who invited him and Iroh to have dinner with them. The scar on Song’s leg was still burned into Zuko’s mind. Suddenly he thought of Jet, the Freedom Fighter who just wanted the Fire Nation to pay for their crimes against others. Zuko never did find out what happened to Jet, but every time he remembered Jet being dragged away by Dai Li agents, he couldn’t help but wish that he had done something to help him. Then there was Li, the boy he met when he was traveling alone. Li, whose brother was off fighting against the Fire Nation and who looked at Zuko with so much hate when he found out his true identity. Then, of course, there were Aang, Katara and Sokka, Toph, and Suki. Their lives have been completely different since they’ve entered the war.

Zuko just never thought about his own people who were suffering at the hands of his father. 

Sighing, he placed his head in his hands, squeezing his eyes shut, feeling hot tears form in the corners of his eyes. How could he have missed this? How naive was he? Was there anything else that he had missed? How he wished Uncle Iroh were here to give him some sort of guidance.

The door opened gently, and Zuko wiped the tears from his eyes, looking up as Katara entered the room, closing the door behind her softly. Before she could say anything, Zuko got up off the bed and went over the rocking chair, basically collapsing on it as he sat. Thunder boomed outside and the whole house shook, and for a moment Zuko had forgotten that they were stranded in a storm. 

“You okay?” Katara asked, sitting on the bed and crossing her legs, placing her elbows on her knees and balancing her chin on her hands. 

“Just thinking, that’s all,” Zuko told her, sighing deeply. “It’s just - I never realized that my people were suffering because of this stupid war. How could I be so naive to have missed that?”

“Because you were raised to think otherwise,” Katara answered simply with a small shrug of her shoulder. “As the prince, you were fed propaganda to believe that your nation is the best, and that you were one step closer to victory. You were taught that this war would benefit everyone, when in reality, most of the world is suffering.”

“You are,” Zuko said, causing Katara to sigh in reply. “Your mother was taken from you when you were a child because of the Fire Nation, you spent a whole year hiding from _me_ because I was trying to get Aang. Yet, you’ve taken so much of this with grace. How?”

“I’m not always so graceful, Zuko,” Katara told him. “I’m angry, I have been for years now.”

“Are you angry now?” Zuko asked. Another boom of thunder, a flash of lightning that lit Katara’s eyes up; Zuko was expecting to see anger or hatred, but he didn’t. Instead, there was sorrow. Pain. 

“No, not as much as I was,” Katara explained. “And before you say I have every right to be angry, I know I do. I just - I started to look past my anger I guess.”

“I’m still angry,” Zuko admitted, causing Katara to raise an eyebrow at him in question. “I don’t know, it’s hard to explain.”

“Okay, you don’t have to,” Katara told him. “I won’t push you.”

“Just like I won’t push you,” Zuko replied, giving her a small smile. 

Katara returned the smile before adjusting herself, moving from the middle of the bed towards the end, grabbing the edge of the blanket to settle down. Zuko got up from the rocking chair and grabbed the blanket that hung over the edge of the bed. Katara handed him a pillow before she laid down, settling beneath the covers to get comfortable. Zuko made his way to the floor, covering himself with the blanket as he laid back. 

“Zuko,” came Katara’s voice from up above.

“Yeah, Katara?” Zuko asked, turning his head and making out Katara’s figure on the bed.

“If - when I’m ready to talk about it,” Katara began, her voice small, “will you listen?”

Zuko caught his breath. “Yes, of course. I’ll always listen to you, Katara.”

“Thank you,” she replied, voice cracking. 

“Anything for you, Katara,” Zuko told her honestly, feeling the way his heart skipped a beat as he said it. 

Did he really mean what he said? Did she know that he meant it? That he would do anything for her? 

The silence between them was no longer stifling, but peaceful in a way. The only sounds heard were the sounds of their even breathing, the rain pounding against the house, and the occasional rumble of thunder from outside. 

But Zuko could not sleep, and he knew that Katara wasn’t sleeping either. There was something that was rattling around in his mind, and since Katara was finally starting to open up to him, he decided to try.

“Katara?” he asked, and though he spoke softly, his voice sounded loud in the quiet room. “Are you still awake?”

“Yes,” she breathed. 

“There’s something I’ve been thinking about,” he told her, rolling over onto his side so he could look up at Katara. “You don’t have to tell me anything, but I just need to let you know.”

The covers rustled above him and suddenly Katara was at the edge of the bed, looking down at Zuko. “You can tell me.”

“The captain on the Southern Raiders’ ship,” he began, closing his eyes, the man’s awkward movements playing out in his mind. “You were… controlling him.”

“Yes,” Katara replied gently. “I was controlling him.”

“Can I ask what you were doing?” He heard Katara let out a breath and she moved away from the edge of the bed so Zuko could no longer see her. “I’m sorry, you don’t have to answer. It’s just - I won’t lie, I was terrified at that moment. Terrified of you and your power. But also, extremely amazed at what you were doing. I just needed to tell you that.”

Katara was quiet above him and Zuko was sure he had offended her. Just a few moments ago he told her that he wouldn’t push her, wouldn’t make her talk about her trauma, yet here he was asking her to dig up something horrible. 

“Bloodbending,” she said finally, her voice ringing in the room. “I was bloodbending.”

Zuko swallowed. “Bloodbending?”

“It’s hard to explain,” Katara told him. 

“You don’t have to,” Zuko assured her. “I’m sorry, I don’t want to pry.”

“No, no, I need to talk about it.” Katara let out another breath and she moved back to the edge of the bed so she could look at Zuko. “I learned it from an old woman named Hama. She was a waterbender from the South Pole who was captured in a raid many years ago. When she was imprisoned, she learned that she could bend the blood in living creatures with every full moon. Every full moon, she perfected her craft until she could finally use it to escape.”

Zuko listened carefully, being sure to keep silent as Katara told her tale. How they found Hama in a small Fire Nation village where she had been living since her escape. How Hama captured innocent citizens every full moon as revenge for what had happened to her years before. How Hama taught Katara about bloodbending to use against her enemies.

“I told myself I would never use it,” Katara told him, “that it was terrible, being able to control somebody like a puppet. Reaching into their body, into their _veins_ and making them bend to your whim. I didn’t want that power, but…”

“You used it against the captain,” Zuko finished. “Katara, I understand.”

“No you don’t,” Katara replied. “You don’t know what it’s like to do that to someone, to take away their free will like that.”

“You’re right, I don’t understand that aspect,” Zuko agreed patiently. “But I do understand being so angry that you feel the need to take control of a situation.”

“When I saw him, all I could do was hate,” Katara continued. She didn’t sound angry, but rather calm, even. “I wanted to make him suffer like I did.”

“You’re only human, Katara,” Zuko told her. 

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore,” Katara said quietly just as lightning lit up the room once more. “I - I’m sorry.”

“Then we don’t need to,” Zuko assured her. “I’m sorry again for bringing it up.”

“I think I needed to talk about it, even if it was just a little bit.” Katara sighed, moving away from the edge. 

They fell quiet once more, unsure of what to say. Zuko had gotten his answer as to what Katara was doing to the captain, but it made him feel worse. He wasn’t scared of Katara, wasn’t scared of her power, but he was worried about her. 

“Zuko?” she said quietly. 

“Yeah, Katara?”

“I bet the floor isn’t really comfortable,” she exclaimed slowly. “Do you - would you like to just share the bed?”

Zuko’s heart caught in this throat. “The floor really sucks and I woke up feeling like shit this morning.”

The covers rustled again. “Then come up.”

Slowly, Zuko got up off the floor, grabbing the pillow and the blanket as he did. Katara had moved over to the right side of the bed, laying on her back as she watched Zuko settle down next to her. He was sure to leave enough room between them, laying on his back just as she did. 

“Uh, thanks,” he told her, and Katara hummed in reply.

Zuko stayed awake long after Katara fell asleep, listening to her muttering as she dreamt. At one point, she rolled over onto her side facing away from Zuko, curling up in a ball. Tentatively, he reached out to her, placing a hand on her back and moving it in circles. Beneath his hand, she stopped shaking, but Zuko continued his movements, just in case. 

_Safe with me_ , he thought to himself, closing his eyes. _You’re safe with me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this a Zutara fic or a Miho fic? Who knows not me. Anyways, you should all know I was not planning on having Zuko and Katara share the bed until AT LEAST chapter 9, but these two kids want to be soft and they want to be soft right NOW. Still, they have a little bit more to go, and Katara still has not explicitly told Zuko the she trusts him yet.


	8. guts and glory

The next morning found both Zuko and Katara up at the same time. For Zuko, it was the sun rising in the sky tugging at his veins that woke him up. For Katara, it was Yon Rha’s face.

She still had not told Zuko about what she was seeing in her nightmares, even though she knew that he would not judge her. But last night, at the height of her nightmare, she had woken up and rolled over onto her side so that Zuko could not see her crying, even though he was most likely asleep. As she shook with sobs as quietly as she could, she felt something on her back, just between her shoulders. Zuko’s hand was warm, soothing, as he rubbed her back slowly. Katara had felt herself relax at his touch, closing her eyes once more as he soothed her, not saying anything. Maybe he thought she was still asleep, assumed that she hadn’t felt him. 

When they woke up this morning, Zuko didn’t say anything about last night. Instead, he swung his legs off the bed and stretched his arms above his head.

“You’re right, the bed was more comfortable,” he told her lightly, standing up and turning around to fix the blanket. 

“Thought you would like it better than the floor,” Katara agreed, also standing up. “I wonder if Miho is awake yet.”

Together they headed downstairs to find Miho in the kitchen, cups of tea and bowls of fruit already set out on the table for breakfast. Miho welcomed them with a kind smile, but didn’t say anything. With a silent agreement, they all decided to forget about the conversation they had the night before. 

The storm still raged on inside, and Katara had to admit that she was surprised that the storm still had not let up. 

“Storms in the Fire Nation are rare,” Zuko explained as they walked over to the store with Miho. “When they hit, they’re here to stay.”

“How long do they usually last?” Katara asked, her eyes lingering on a couple of soldiers loafing at the edge of the path. They eyed Katara, one of them elbowing his companion as he pointed to her appreciatively. She moved closer to Zuko, taking his hand in hers and gripping it tightly. 

“Depends, I guess,” Zuko replied, gripping her hand in return. He didn’t need to look at the soldiers to know why Katara was holding him. “But I’ll tell you this, we’re almost always underprepared for storms when they finally hit.” 

At the shop, Katara and Zuko completed all the odd tasks Miho told them to complete. While the last couple of days were quiet, customers began to trickle in. With the storm going on outside, people needed food and they had decided to brave the weather to get what they needed. 

“Jun,” Miho called at one point, motioning for Katara to come to the counter. Katara had been watering the plants, watching the water trickle into the dirt and yearning to just bend the water in front of her. 

“Yes, Miho?” Katara asked once she approached the counter. A little boy was roaming around the shop, picking out vegetables and placing them in his basket. 

“Do you mind running back to the house for me?” Miho asked, her eyes on the little boy. “Lee is out back organizing, and I forgot my basket. I plan on bringing some leftovers home for dinner tonight.”

“Sure, I’ll be right back,” Katara answered, heading out the door. The little boy looked at her as she left, and she offered him a kind smile. 

Katara rushed back to Miho’s, the rain oddly soothing on her skin. Lightning continued to flash in the sky, but Katara had finally grown used to it. She felt the mud beneath her feet  _ squelch  _ and she suddenly remembered the sound of Yon Rha’s body hitting the ground. She paused briefly, trying to forget the sound in her memory. There was movement in her peripheral vision, causing Katara to continue walking, this time with a quickened pace. 

The basket Miho asked for sat on the edge of the counter just inside the kitchen and Katara grabbed it and headed back into town. As she walked, her arm looped through the basket’s handle, Katara saw the little boy from the shop in the middle of town. A group of soldiers had stopped him and were now pushing him around. One had grabbed his basket of food and was rustling through it.

“Hey, hey, spare some food for us kid,” one soldier taunted, pushing the boy to his comrade. 

“Yeah, don’t you know how to be hospitable?” the other soldier exclaimed, laughing as the little boy fell into the mud face first. 

“All he grabbed was shit,” said the third soldier who was looking through the basket. “Most of this is moldy or shriveled.” 

“What do you expect from a bullshit village like this?” the original soldier stated, shaking his head. He walked over to the little boy who was starting to stand up, placing a booted foot on his back. “Why did you only pick up garbage, you little shit?”

The boy didn’t reply, just lay in the mud as silent tears fell from his eyes. He couldn’t have been more than nine years old. Katara watched from the sidelines, unable to move from her spot. The rain blurred her vision, and she felt the urge to bring the rain water towards her to use against the soldiers. Would she really be willing to risk revealing herself to save this boy? 

Luckily, the soldiers got bored and walked away, making their way towards the edge of town as they laughed boisterously. When they were far enough away, Katara finally found her courage and ran towards the boy who was slowly beginning to stand up. Once she was next to him, she bent down and offered him a hand, which he took gratefully.

“Are you okay?” she asked him, his face and clothes muddy. His face was streaked with tears and snot ran down his nose, but the little boy nodded, wiping his face with the back of his hand. 

Together, they picked up the discarded food that the soldier had thrown to the side, placing it back into the boy’s basket. Katara could feel the eyes of soldiers watching her, but she pushed aside the uneasy feeling she had. 

“You can’t let people bigger than you bully you,” Katara told the boy as they stood up together. 

“My mama said that too,” the boy sniffed. “But I don’t want to get in trouble.”

“Go home,” Katara suggested. “Go home and forget this happened. It’ll be okay.”

The boy nodded, gripping the basket in his hand tightly. “Thank you.”

Katara watched the boy run off, her heart pounding in her chest. Once he was out of sight, Katara turned to see the soldiers still watching her. She recognized one of them, the young soldier named Hiratao that had smirked at her in the store yesterday. He stared at her, a smile on his face as Katara lifted her chin towards him. One of the soldiers elbowed him in the ribs and whispered something in his ear, causing him to wink at Katara. Clearing her throat, Katara went back to the shop, trying to ignore the sensation of the soldiers watching her boring into her back.

As soon as she walked through the door, Miho came at her, shoving her towards the wall. 

“What do you think you’re  _ doing _ ?” Miho hissed, releasing Katara angrily. 

“What do you mean?” Katara scoffed, dropping the basket on the ground and staring at Miho. Zuko had come out from the back room, his lone brow raised in confusion at the scene unfolding before him. 

“Helping that boy?” Miho asked, pointing towards the door. “Why would you do that?”

“Miho, he was in the mud after the soldiers pushed him around,” Katara replied, shaking her head. “He needed help, he’s just a child!”

“And you already have a target on your back,” Miho snapped, grabbing the basket off the floor. “You’re drawing too much attention to yourself and if you want to get home to your friends, I suggest you stop sticking your nose in places it doesn’t belong!”

“Miho, he’s a child!” Katara repeated, her voice raising. “How could I  _ not  _ help him? Those soldiers were taking advantage of him, I couldn’t sit there and do nothing!”

“No, Jun, that’s  _ exactly  _ what you do!” Miho exclaimed loudly. “That’s how you survive in war as a civilian! You sit back and watch atrocities happen whether you like it or not!” 

Katara stood there, tears welling up in her eyes as the old woman glared at her. How could Miho think that? How could anyone just stand back and let awful things happen?

“You talk to her,” Miho said, addressing Zuko. “She listens to you.”

Katara looked up at Zuko who just stood there not saying anything. Muttering under breath, Miho went to the back room, slamming the door behind her as she did. 

Zuko walked over to Katara and was about to place a hand on her shoulder when Katara threw herself into his arms, letting the tears fall freely. She clutched at his tunic, burying her face in his chest. She felt Zuko’s arms wrap around her, keeping her grounded.

“How could she say that?” Katara cried. “How can anyone just stand there and watch this happen? I feel so helpless, so completely useless.”

The man holding her didn’t reply, just held her tightly, his chin resting on the top of her head. 

“I hate not being able to do anything,” Katara continued. “I hate being here feeling powerless. I want to help people, I want to be out there fighting, but I  _ can’t  _ and I hate it.”

“You have a big heart, Katara,” Zuko said softly, running his hand through her hair soothingly. “But Miho is right, we need to keep to the shadows as much as possible until we can get back to the others.” 

“The others,” Katara repeated, feeling even worse. “I miss the others, I’m so worried about them and they don’t even know where we are.”

“I’m sure they’re waiting for us,” Zuko assured her. 

“I just - I want  _ Sokka _ ,” Katara cried, feeling like a child as she sobbed for her brother. When she was younger, and the nightmares about her mother’s death still plagued her night after night, Katara used to wake up calling for Sokka. He would come over to her, wrapping his arms around her as she cried, waiting until she fell back asleep. 

“I’m sorry,” Zuko whispered. “I don’t know how to make this better.”

“Just hold me,” Katara asked, wrapping her arms around Zuko’s torso. 

It felt strange; a few days ago Katara had refused to let Zuko even touch her, but now she willingly let him hold her in his strong arms. She never outright told him that she trusted him, but she had the feeling Zuko understood. Slowly, Katara felt herself opening herself up to him, feeling the wall she built to protect herself crumble. At first, she wasn’t sure what was filling the cracks that kept her from breaking, but now she knew: it was Zuko. 

Miho finally came out of the back room, her eyes falling on Katara and Zuko at the side of the room. She didn’t say anything, just got to work counting the money in her small chest. Zuko pressed his lips to the top of Katara’s head before releasing her. 

“It’ll be okay,” he assured her quietly, “I promise.” 

Katara let go of Zuko and nodded carefully. She looked back at Miho who still didn’t look at her. For some reason, she felt her face go hot, ashamed for how she acted towards the older woman who had been nothing but kind to her. 

“I’m sorry, Miho,” Katara whispered as Zuko walked away from her. 

Miho looked up from what she was doing to look at Katara. “I just don’t want you to get into any trouble.”

“I know,” Katara replied, looking down at her feet. “I’ll be more careful.” 

Miho nodded and continued counting. Zuko got to work organizing the shelf; it was already clean, but Katara could tell he was restless. At this point, Katara was willing to brave the storm again if it meant finding their friends. 

Out the window, Katara could see the soldiers pushing around another villager, an older man with a basket of spices. Just like the little boy, they pushed him into the mud, but rather than leaving him alone, each one began kicking the man. With each blow, thunder boomed up ahead, drowning out the old man’s cries. The soldiers just laughed as the man cowered, trying to curl into a ball to protect himself. Katara watched in horror, but she remembered what Miho told her. With a deep breath, Katara turned away from the window, wrapping her arms around herself as she bit her lip. Zuko paused what he was doing to watch her. 

“I’m not going to do anything,” she told him, walking away from the window, not looking as the man’s blood mixed with the mud. 

Zuko looked past her, eyes on the soldiers. “It looks like it might be too late anyways.”

Miho let out a sigh as the soldiers walked away from the man who laid still in the mud. Blood rushed from his nose and mouth, his arm was angled awkwardly on the ground. No one made a move towards him. 

He was still there when Katara, Zuko, and Miho left the shop at nightfall. 

* * *

“How are we supposed to even know which estate belongs to the Fire Lord?” Suki asked as she leaned over Appa’s saddle, staring at the island that became clearer up ahead. 

“Zuko told me that it was in the cliffs,” Sokka said, coming up behind Suki and watching as well. “He said there was a private dock his family usually used when they visited as a child.”

“So, what, you drive Appa towards the island and hope we find the right dock?” Toph asked. She was lying in the middle of Appa’s saddle, one leg bent, the other foot resting on her knee. “That seems like a good idea.”

“I’m sure we’ll figure it out,” Sokka assured her, turning to face her and frowning. “Aang, find somewhere inconspicuous to land, then Suki and I will head further inland to see if we can figure anything out.” 

Aang nodded from Appa’s head, pulling at the reins to lead Appa down towards the water. Luckily, there were no boats around to see them, so the gang was able to slip on through. Aang had Appa land on one of the empty beaches, and Sokka and Suki jumped off. 

“Take off and just wander around,” Sokka told Aang as Suki looked around. “We should be back in maybe half an hour.”

Aang nodded in reply as Sokka and Suki ran off, disappearing between the opening of a cliff. Once they were gone, Aang flicked the reins and Appa launched into the air, being sure to keep low enough so they couldn’t be found. 

“What do you think?” Toph said, crawling towards the front of the saddle and leaning her arms against it. “Think they’ll be able to locate the estate?”

“Knowing Suki, probably,” Aang replied, pulling the reins to the right so Appa went farther out to sea. “But it’s not them I’m worried about.”

“You know you’re not the only one who’s worried right?” Toph asked, rolling her eyes behind Aang’s back. 

Aang scoffed and turned to face Toph, even though she couldn’t see the pointed look he was giving her. “You sure don’t act like you are.”

“Because I know that Zuko and Katara are some of the strongest people we know,” Toph replied easily, blowing a piece of hair out of her face. “Knowing them, they probably came up with some crazy scheme to get out of whatever trouble they may have gotten into.”

“So you think they’re in trouble?” Aang asked, eyes going wide.

“No, Aang, I don’t  _ know _ if they are,” Toph stated, sighing deeply. “Listen, I know how you feel about Katara.” 

Aang started sputtering, rubbing his head with his hand, but Toph just cut him off with a shake of her head.

“I’m blind, but I’m not  _ stupid _ ,” she told him. “But you can’t go worrying about Katara all the time. She can handle whatever life throws at her. And I know how worried you were about her going off with Zuko to confront her mother’s killer, but when she comes back, you better not judge her if she made the decision you don’t agree with.”

“It was probably Zuko who influenced her anyways,” Aang snapped, facing forwards once more.

“That’s not fair,” Toph stated. “Katara is her own person, she doesn’t need your or Zuko’s morals shoved down her throat. Whatever she decided to do she did it of her own accord. So stop your whining and focus on defeating the Fire Lord.”

“But -” Aang started, but Toph shushed him.

“No,” Toph said firmly. “We have a mission that we need to focus on. It’s a shitty situation, but it’s life. I hate it as much as you do, but you don’t hear me whining, do you?”

“Didn’t know you cared that much,” Aang muttered, flicking the reins slightly so that Appa moved to the left. 

“I’m an only child, Aang,” Toph said, her voice oddly stiff. “Katara and Zuko are the older siblings I never had. So excuse me for worrying, but for also knowing that they’ll find a way back to us.”

Aang didn’t reply, but he felt ashamed for the way he had treated Toph. Of course Toph was the first person to warm up to Zuko when he joined, she wasn’t around when he was chasing them around the world. Together, Zuko and Toph formed a little team; for some reason, Toph opened up more easily to Zuko than she did anyone else. 

“Sorry, Toph,” Aang said finally. 

“Whatever, let’s just focus on what we’re doing,” Toph replied, back to her normal self. 

After the allotted amount of time, Aang rode Appa back towards the beach where Sokka and Suki were waiting for them.

“Well?” Aang asked as they climbed up on the saddle. 

“According to some pretty good intel,” Sokka said, settling down next to Toph, “the estate is on the northern part of the island. She also said it’s been abandoned for years, basically since Ozai had taken the throne.”

“So no one will bother us,” Suki finished as Appa jumped back into the air. “And, if we’re lucky, Katara and Zuko will join us soon.”

“The comet is only a month away,” Sokka stated, looking at Suki. “We have to come up with a back up plan, just in case.”

“They’ll be here,” Toph assured them. “I know they will.”

On Appa’s head, Aang sat quietly. He just steered Appa to the north of the island, where the estate came into view. The others talked quietly behind him, clearly unsure of how to proceed. 

Whatever happens, happens. 

* * *

Later that night, Zuko and Katara laid in bed, still keeping far enough apart so that they weren’t touching. Katara thought it was funny, because despite the fact that he held her in his arms earlier, he refused to sit close to her in bed. It was almost as if he were nervous, though to be honest, Katara was nervous too. 

“Did I ever tell you about my mother?” Zuko asked suddenly, turning his head to look at her. 

“No.” Katara turned her head as well, her eyes meeting Zuko’s.

“When I was younger, we used to pick one day a month to wake up extra early,” Zuko explained, a soft smile on his face. “Then, we would find somewhere in the palace to watch the sunrise. Sometimes it was the roof, sometimes a tree in one of the courtyards. We would sit there quietly and just watch as the sun climbed into the sky.”

“I’ve never really watched a Fire Nation sunrise,” Katara admitted, watching as Zuko blinked at her. “We were either up right as the sun rose or we accidentally slept too late and Sokka would freak out because we were behind schedule.”

A pang in her chest. Katara let out a breath and looked back up at the ceiling. 

“Maybe you’ll get to watch one one day,” Zuko told her, not even thinking of the implications of saying this to her. Though as soon as the words fell out of his mouth, he felt himself turn red and he was glad that the room was dark enough so Katara couldn’t see him.

She didn’t seem to think anything of it though, because she poked him in the ribs. “Promise?”

“Yeah, I promise,” he told her, holding a hand up with his pinky finger out. 

He watched as Katara raised her own hand and wrapped her pinky around his own. They held that position for a brief moment before Katara finally slipped her hand away, placing it next to her awkwardly. 

“My mom used to tell me the most beautiful stories when I was younger,” Katara told him, longing in her voice. “She used to pull Sokka and I up on her lap and hold us tight. She had this funny habit of changing her voice for each character, making us giggle as she told her stories.”

“What was your favorite?” Zuko asked her, resting his hands on his stomach. 

“It was about the sun and the moon,” Katara told him. 

“Want to tell me about it?” he asked her. 

“Sure,” Katara replied. “Long ago, the sun used to rein the sky by himself, shining brightly over the land below. At the end of his day, he would slowly descend back to his home down below. But each time he fell, he would watch the moon begin her own journey into the sky. The sun loved the moon, but he knew that they could never meet. Instead, he longed for her in silence, watching as she controlled the tides in all her glory.

“One day, though, he finally had courage to say something as he passed her. ‘Oh, Moon, how lovely you are when you shine in the sky.’ The moon didn’t reply, just continued her climb to the sky. Though the sun was disappointed, he tried the next day. ‘Oh, Moon, the way you control the tides is far beyond my control!’ This did get the moon’s attention, for she called back ‘Oh, Sun, you are the bringer of life and energy, I am just a bright light in the sky.’ 

“The sun was unsure of how to proceed from there, but each night he called to the moon offering his support. The moon always called back, but the sun couldn’t help notice that she sounded so sad. ‘My Moon,’ the sun said, ‘why are you so sad?’ The moon sighed before responding, ‘Because you love me, but I am undeserving of your love.’”

Katara paused at this point, causing Zuko to poke her like she had him. “Hey, what else happens?”

“I - I don’t actually know,” Katara admitted quietly. “She never finished telling it to us. She - she was killed before she could.”

“Oh, Katara,” Zuko began, but Katara sighed before he could continue. 

“My Gran Gran tried to finish the story, but I wouldn’t let her,” Katara explained, voice breaking. “That was the last story my mom told me and I don’t even know the ending.” 

“Maybe we can find out the ending together?” Zuko offered, earning him a sharp intake of breath from Katara. He felt the embarrassment bubble up inside him when he realized how that sounded, his face going hot. “Ah, I mean, like, we look for the ending? Miho has a lot of books, maybe one of them has that story.”

“Okay, Zuko,” Katara stated, poking him in the ribs once more. “That would be nice though. It’s been years since I even thought about that story, even though I’ve thought about her every single day.” 

“I know what you mean.” Zuko sighed, rubbing his good eye with his hand. “Maybe we should get some sleep.”

Thunder boomed, lightning cracked, and the wind roared. Next to him, Katara jumped, moving a tiny bit closer to Zuko as she did. Zuko resisted the urge to hold her again like he did earlier that day. 

“Good night, Zuko,” she said softly, voice barely above a whisper. 

“Good night, Katara,” he replied, listening to the sounds of her breathing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If the timeline between Zuko and Katara and the rest of the Gaang seem off, no they don't ❤️


	9. did not break me

The next couple of days spent with Miho were monotonous as Katara and Zuko fell into the same routine as the older woman. 

Both would wake up at sunrise and lay in bed quietly, neither one saying anything to the other. Though the silence was awkward at first, both had grown accustomed to it. It wasn’t until they heard Miho rustling around downstairs that they would both get up out of bed, fix the covers, and head downstairs to start their day.

Luckily, the monotony broke up a few times with more and more people braving the stormy weather to go into town and buy goods. 

“People need to eat,” Miho had told them when the last customer of the afternoon had sauntered off, a basket of goods in her hand. “They cower in the beginning because they are so scared of the unknown, but they do not realize the longer they wait, the worse it gets.”

And worse it got, indeed. At one point, on the fourth day of the storm, the bottom of the hill flooded with water, completely ruining the homes located at the base. Miho had Katara and Zuko go off to help the villagers clear as much water as they could, or save the furniture in the ruined and waterlogged houses.

“If only I could help more,” Katara told Zuko quietly as they worked together to dig a small canal to lead the water away from the town. “I could just waterbend this all away and the village would be fine.”

Zuko stabbed at the dirt below, watching it crumble before turning to look at Katara. “I know you do, but we can’t risk you getting caught.”

“I hate not doing anything,” Katara replied, picking at a stubborn rock with her shovel.

Zuko moved over to help her, placing his shovel behind the rock and pulling so that it fell forward. “You  _ are  _ doing something. Even if it’s not at maximum capacity, you’re helping these people as much as you can.”

Still, Katara felt like a sitting turtleduck, small and feeble and unable to protect those around her. Since Miho told her to stop butting her nose into other people’s business, Katara had done her best to avoid the soldiers who continued to sneer at her as she walked through the town. Every time she walked by a group, she would feel the way their eyes would linger on her, map out her body appreciatively as they whistled at her. When Zuko was with her, they would stay silent, but the stares did not stop. 

The more time she spent with him, the more Katara began to notice little pieces of Zuko that she had never seen before. 

At one particular point, a mother and her small daughter came into the store looking for fruit, grains, and tea leaves. The little girl took a liking to Zuko, staring at him as he mopped the floor. When he caught her staring, she hid behind her mother’s legs, but Zuko gave the girl a soft smile. Looking around, he leaned the mop against one of the shelves and walked over to the girl, bending down so that they were eye to eye. 

“What’s your name?” he asked her, that soft smile still on his face. His hood was down, and Katara watched as the little girl’s eyes widened at Zuko’s scar. 

“Ming,” the little girl replied slowly, clutching at her mother who paid no attention. 

“Well, Ming, my name is Lee,” Zuko told her, holding out his hand to her. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Ming stared at Zuko’s hand tentatively before slowly wrapping her fingers around it. Zuko took her hand, shaking it back and forth and up and down, making Ming laugh at his antics. 

“No, no, no!” she told him happily. “Not like that!”

“No?” Zuko asked, his eyebrow raised in mock confusion. “Then how do I do it?”

Katara watched as Ming let go of her mother and taught Zuko the proper way to shake one’s hand. Zuko started laughing as the little girl went into as much detail as possible. At one point, Ming pointed to Zuko’s scar, and Katara watched as he bowed his head to her.

“A bad man hurt me,” he told her, standing up so that he could look down at her.

“A bad man?” Ming asked, eyes going wide once more. 

“Yes,” Zuko replied, nodding gravely down at her. “But don’t worry, that bad man will never hurt you.”

“Why?” 

“Because, I’m going to stop the bad man,” Zuko explained gently, placing a hand on Ming’s shoulder. “I’m going to make sure that no bad man can ever hurt anyone ever again.” 

Ming pat Zuko’s arm. “D’you promise?”

“Yes, I promise,” Zuko assured her. 

The mother finished paying for her goods and grabbed Ming’s hand, ushering her out of the store. Before they walked back out into the storm, she offered Zuko a kind smile in thanks. Zuko nodded back to her before looking at Katara.

“You saw that whole thing?” he asked, running a hand through his hair. 

“Every bit,” Katara replied, a newfound respect for Zuko coursing through her. “Who knew you were so good with kids?”

Zuko just shrugged. “I just say what I think they want to hear, I guess.”

With that, he got back to work, heading over to Miho when she called him over to help her. 

Katara found herself watching the way he lifted a heavy box for Miho or how he reached towards the top shelf to grab something for a customer. He would open the door for a customer with their hands full or entertain children who were hanging on their parents’ arms. There were so many parts of Zuko that she had never seen before, parts that she had never understood. If she had opened up to him sooner, would she have seen the good in him before this? Would she be as fascinated as she was now, watching his small acts of kindness throughout the day? 

But the more she watched him, the more she wanted to know about him. 

Later that night as they laid in bed, Katara turned on to her side to face Zuko, placing her hands under her cheek as she stared at him.

“Okay, I have another question,” she said, causing Zuko to turn his head to look at her.

The past two nights, Katara and Zuko continued to share stories about their childhoods, going into details about their mothers, Gran Gran, Uncle Iroh, even Sokka and Azula. They talked about favorite colors, favorite foods, and even favorite animals. Zuko shared the story about the time he accidentally burned one of the soldiers training him in firebending when he was a child, how his father scoffed and hit him for apologizing to the man. Katara’s heart hurt for him then.

Zuko smiled and rolled over onto his side to face Katara, mirroring her position as he did. “Okay, shoot.”

“Have you ever been in love?” she asked.

Zuko started laughing, closing his eyes at the question presented to him.

“What’s so funny?” Katara asked defensively, poking him in the stomach to get his attention. It was a sign of affection between them, more so than when Zuko held her close when they walked by the soldiers in town. 

“It’s just funny, that’s all,” Zuko told her, opening his eyes to look at Katara, a lopsided grin on his face. “We’ve talked about so much the past couple of days, I guess I never expected this to come up.” 

“Well, have you?” Katara prompted, poking Zuko’s stomach again. Zuko just swatted her hand away, causing Katara to try and poke him again.

“I had a girlfriend, if that’s what you’re asking,” Zuko replied, placing his hand between them. “Her name was Mai.”

“That gloomy girl with the knives?” Katara asked, propping herself up on her elbow to look down at Zuko. 

Zuko laughed again. “Your brother said that  _ exact  _ same thing.”

Katara punched Zuko’s shoulder. “Okay, so were you in love with her?”

This time Zuko sighed and rolled over onto his back to look up at the ceiling. Katara went back down on her side, curling her legs up into her, her knees practically touching Zuko’s side. 

“I cared for her a lot,” Zuko explained, brushing a piece of hair from his eyes. “But I don’t know if I  _ loved  _ her, if that makes sense?”

“Then why did you date her?” Katara prodded. Zuko rolled over to look at her again, his face hard to read.

“I think I felt like I had to,” Zuko stated. “I was the prince of the Fire Nation, heir to the throne, she’s the daughter of a prominent nobleman. Our marriage would have been deemed acceptable in the eyes of the Fire Sages and the people of the Fire Nation.”

“But you didn’t love her,” Katara told him, feeling herself go hot. She felt jealous, but she wasn’t exactly sure why.

“No, not like that,” Zuko replied. “We were just… different, is the best way I can explain it. I changed a lot when I was banished, and I was so angry at myself that I didn’t know how to control myself. Mai was always brooding and never really let me open myself up to her. I think we brought out the worst in each other if I’m being honest.” 

“I guess that makes sense.” Katara felt Zuko adjust himself so that his knees were now touching her own. 

“I care about her though,” Zuko continued, sighing deeply. “I think there will always be this small part of me that does.”

“That makes you human,” Katara said. “Especially if she was your first sort of love.”

“My first sort of love,” Zuko repeated, his lips twitching as he tried the phrase out. “I think I like that.”

“If you use it again, make sure you give me credit!” Katara exclaimed, feeling herself chuckle in response. 

Zuko reached out and tugged at a piece of hair that fell over her shoulder. “Deal. But what about you? Have you ever been in love?”

“No,” Katara replied, shaking her head. “I’ve  _ liked  _ people sure, but I don’t think I’ve ever loved them.”

“Not even Aang?” Zuko asked innocently, raising his lone eyebrow.

Katara went up on her elbow again, feeling her eyes widen as she looked at Zuko.

“Did I - did I say something wrong?” Zuko asked, also going up on his elbow so that he and Katara were eye level.

“I - no, you didn’t,” Katara stammered, biting her lip. “I just - I’m not sure, I guess.”

“Okay,” Zuko replied gently, placing a hand on her shoulder. “You don’t need to be sure of your feelings right now.”

“Well, no, it’s just that - I’m not sure if I love him the same way he loves me,” Katara admitted finally, collapsing back on the bed and rolling over onto her back, Zuko’s hand falling away from her. She pressed the palms of her hands into her eyes, pushing down to avoid having to look at Zuko who continued to stare at her. 

“You don’t  _ have  _ to love him the same way, Katara,” Zuko told her, grabbing one of her hands and prying it away from her eye. “You don’t owe him anything.”

“I know that,” Katara replied, watching as Zuko took her hand in his, tracing the palm of her hand with his thumb. Katara’s heart fluttered at his touch, but she swallowed the feeling down. 

“You don’t owe anyone anything,” Zuko said softly, still focused on her hand. “Don’t let anyone tell you that you have to do what they want.”

“I never do that anyways,” Katara replied, finally pulling her hand away from Zuko. He didn’t say anything when she did, but he sighed and rolled onto his back. “You really think I let  _ anyone  _ tell me what to do?” 

“Nope, you’re the most stubborn girl I know,” Zuko teased, laughing lightly. 

“And you’re a pretentious asshole sometimes,” Katara teased back, causing Zuko to laugh even harder. She felt herself swell with pride when she heard laugh, especially knowing that it was because she was the one who caused it. He really did have a nice laugh.

“Okay, so I’m an asshole and you’re stubborn,” Zuko said finally. “I think we make quite the team then, don’t we?”

“I think we make a pretty good team,” Katara agreed. “Who knew all you needed was shared trauma and murder to bring two people together.”

“Yeah,” Zuko replied, “who knew?”

A beat between them, each on their backs trying to figure out what to say next. Just like the last few nights, the harsh wind blew against the shudder causing them to shake. 

“I have one more question,” Katara said finally, looking at Zuko from the corner of her eye. “You don’t have to answer it, though, if you don’t want to.”

Zuko rolled over once more, his brow furrowed as he looked at her. “Okay, sure. What’s up?”

“You told that little girl today that you got your scar from a bad man,” Katara said slowly, watching Zuko’s eyes go dark through a flash of lightning. “Who - who did you mean?”

“Katara, if - if I tell you, I don’t want you to feel bad for me,” Zuko replied carefully, raising a hand to touch the scar on his left eye. “And it’s - it’s not a pleasant story.” 

“You don’t have to tell me,” Katara reminded him. “Remember what we talked about? We don’t have to talk if we don’t want to. I don’t want to push you.”

“I think I should though,” Zuko whispered, closing his eyes and dropping his hand away from his face.

Katara watched him as he took a deep breath in, opening his eyes to look at her once more. But she could read his answer in his eyes, the way they fell downcast on the space between them, the way he refused to make eye contact with her.

“It was him wasn’t it,” Katara said softly, her blood turning cold. 

Zuko grimaced, but nodded in return, causing Katara to gape at him, her mouth hanging open incredulously. 

“Your - your own  _ father  _ did that to you?” she whispered, causing Zuko to nod once more. He didn’t look at her, refused to even make eye contact with her.

“I deserved it,” Zuko said quietly, his hand on his scar once more. “I spoke out of turn, I challenged his plan. He was right to burn me.”

“Zuko, no child  _ ever  _ deserves to be burned by their own father,” Katara said firmly, watching as Zuko finally raised his eyes to look at her. “How old were you?”

“Thirteen.” Zuko sighed, his eyes glassy. “I don’t want your pity, Katara.”

“And I don’t want you to think that you deserved that punishment,” Katara retorted. “You don’t still think you deserved it, do you?”

“No, not anymore,” Zuko told her. “I used to think so, used to think that everything he did to me was fine since he was my father and he knew best. It wasn’t until I began traveling with Uncle Iroh that I realized that maybe everything my father put Azula and I through was probably not the best.”

“Zuko, whatever he did to you was  _ wrong _ ,” Katara stated firmly. “He - he shouldn’t have done that.”

“No,” Zuko agreed. “But he did, and it’s over, and I’ve learned to live with it.”

“I guess I understand why you were so angry now,” Katara said. 

Zuko hummed in reply. 

Slowly, carefully, Katara raised her hand and brought it towards Zuko. He was laying on his right side, his scar facing out. Like she did all those months ago, in the catacombs of Ba Sing Se, Katara gently rested her hand against Zuko’s scar, watching as he closed his eyes to her touch. She felt the leathery parts of his skin beneath her fingertips as she slowly moved her fingers towards his ear. He sighed at her touch, but Katara pulled away, causing Zuko to open his eyes to look at her.

“Uh, I think we should go to sleep,” Katara said quickly, rolling over to the other side so that her back was to Zuko. 

“Yeah, sure,” Zuko agreed, and Katara could hear the hurt in his voice. “Good night, Katara.”

“Good night, Zuko,” she replied, feeling the way her heart pounded in her chest.

Zuko moved behind her, and Katara noticed that his warmth had moved away from her. She tried not to think of the implications of pulling her hand away, of what Zuko might possibly be thinking. It’s just when she touched him, she remembered Ba Sing Se, that she stripped her soul bare to him and he turned around and chose Azula. She remembered the struggle to let him in, how much she tried to hate him but just  _ couldn’t  _ because she knew her anger was misplaced. 

When she closed her eyes, she saw Zuko in Yon Rha’s position, just like she did the first night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick thank you to everyone who has left comments and kudos so far! ❤️


	10. painful reminder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for attempted sexual assault. If I need to update the tags, please let me know.
> 
> If you do not want to read, the scene happens as Katara is walking back to the shop and I would say you can continue when Katara makes it back to Miho's house.

The next morning, Zuko and Katara joined Miho once more for breakfast. Surprisingly, the storm outside seemed to have finally calmed down, though it still rained throughout the night and most likely would continue throughout the day. 

Sitting next to each other as always, Katara couldn’t help but watch Zuko out of the corner of her eye as he drank his tea and ate the small breakfast Miho had prepared for them. He made no mention of last night, just got up at sunrise like always. But instead of waiting for her to wake up too, he made his way downstairs without her. She knew she had offended him, but she did not know how to apologize.

“Looks like the storm is ending soon,” Miho exclaimed, placing her cup down on the table and looking out the window. 

“Yes, and then we can finally get out of your hair,” Zuko replied, also looking out the window. The sky was still dark, but it no longer had that gloomy, eerie feeling like it did the past few days. 

Miho nodded and looked back at her two guests. “Yes, I suppose that’s true. If these soldiers are still here tomorrow, it will be good to get you out.” 

“Do you know anyone with transportation?” Zuko asked. 

“Kimi,” Miho answered. “The other day his wife told me that as soon as this storm lets up, he has to go to one of the northern islands to trade his crops for some textile goods. I’m sure he would be happy to take you with him.”

“How can we pay him?” Katara asked, standing up and grabbing her empty tea cup. She pointed at Zuko’s, and he nodded, pushing it over to her. As she walked around the table, she felt Miho’s eyes watching her.

“You won’t have to,” Miho replied, handing Katara her own empty cup. “He’ll do it as a favor to me.”

“He thinks I’m your nephew too?” Zuko asked, raising his lone eyebrow at Miho.

Miho chuckled. “No, everyone in this village knows my only brother died when he was a teenager. But they know a couple of broken and deserted kids when they see them.”

Katara turned to look at Zuko, motioning towards Miho over the fact that she had dropped another piece of information about her past in front of them. Zuko just shrugged when Miho wasn’t looking, and Katara didn’t want to bring up painful memories.

“Again, I’m old, I’m not stupid,” Miho commented, turning to face Katara, whose face turned red at being caught. “If you’re going to ask about my brother, just do it.”

“What happened to him?” Zuko burst out, causing Miho to face him now. At her raised eyebrows, he shifted awkwardly on the cushion. 

“Killed,” Miho said simply. “There are more reasons as to why I hate the Fire Nation Army.”

That shut Zuko up. Katara just continued cleaning the cups, not knowing what else to say. She had seen the atrocities of the Fire Nation against its own people, but never had so many happened to just one person. Miho was tougher than Katara had assumed, and she was forever grateful it was Miho who opened her door to her and Zuko.

“Well, hurry up you two,” Miho stated, clapping her hands at Zuko as she stood up from the table. “Lee, I need you to come with me to the shop. Jun, do you mind going to Nyahitha’s down the road and picking up my delivery? He has some spices for me.”

“Yes, of course,” Katara replied, placing the washed cups on the counter to dry. “Just point me in the direction to go.”

Outside in the rain, Miho pointed to where Nyahitha lived and the crew broke apart: Zuko and Miho to the shop and Katara towards the trader. 

Nyahitha lived within the inner part of the village, closer to the small square than Miho, but still enough of a walk. The rain still fell steadily, but it was not as harsh as it was when Katara and Zuko had tried to leave. Unlike the past couple of days, the rain felt soothing on Katara’s skin and she had to resist the urge to bend the water around her hand. She remembered when she was younger, she once formed crystals with the water that clung to her parka, causing Sokka to yelp in surprise. She smiled at the memory despite the ache in her heart yearning for brother’s company. 

Once at Nyahitha’s, Katara knocked on the door, the old man opening it as soon as Katara’s hand left the surface. 

“Yes?” he asked, looking her up and down suspiciously. 

“I’m here for Miho,” Katara explained. “I’m picking up the spices. My name is Jun.”

Nyahitha’s eyes softened as he ushered Katara into his house from out of the rain. “Yes, yes, my apologies. With the soldiers occupying the village, I’ve just been very wary.”

“I understand,” Katara stated, smiling at the old man. “Miho seems to be the same way.”

“Let me go get those spices for you,” Nyahitha told her. “Wait here.”

With that, he bustled out of the room, whistling to himself as he did. Katara stood awkwardly just inside the threshold, looking around the room. It was bigger than Miho’s house with the small living area right inside the door. The kitchen, it seemed, was down a small hallway. The sound of Nyhitha’s whistling penetrated the thin walls and Katara couldn’t help but chuckle. 

He was only gone a few moments before returning to the front with a small bag in his hands. As he handed it to her, he said, “Please tell Miho that is all I have for now. What with the storm, it was a hard time.”

“I’m sure she’ll understand,” Katara replied warmly, taking the surprisingly light bag in her hand. 

“She’s very lucky to have you,” Nyahitha commented, raising his thick eyebrows at you. “I’m sure she will be sad to see you go.”

“Yes, well my - my fiance and I have to get back home,” Katara stammered, feeling herself turning pink as Nyahitha chuckled.

“Yes, yes, I’m sure you do,” he mused, giving Katara a knowing smile and tapping his nose lightly. “Good luck on your journeys if I don’t see you then!”

“Yes, thank you!” Nyahitha opened the door and Katara saw herself out, holding the bag against her. Outside, she gave the old man one last wave before making her way back into town. 

She breathed in the cool air, feeling the way the rain fell on her skin, the way the droplets paved a way down her arms. If it hadn’t been for the storm ripping her and Zuko off of Appa’s back, Katara would’ve thought that the rain was beautiful. The clouds above her were slowly starting to dissipate, though they held their position stubbornly for just a little longer. Hopefully, in the next day or two, she and Zuko would be on a boat one step closer to their friends. 

As she made her way deeper into the village towards Miho’s store, Katara noticed the soldiers loitering around a closed storefront. The one who always seemed to lead the cat calls, Hiratao, was among them, elbowing his fellow soldiers as she passed. Doing her best, Katara focused on the path in front of her, gripping the bag more tightly. 

“Hey, hey, wait up,” Hiratao called, running over and falling into stride next to Katara. “Where are you going, gorgeous?”

“Don’t call me that,” Katara told him evenly, glancing at him from the corner of her eye. She saw him smirk at her, licking his lips as he stared down at her breasts. 

“Now, you don’t mean that, do you?” Hiratao purred, leaning in closer to her. “A man can’t admire a beautiful woman when he sees one?”

Katara paused and glared at the soldier in front of her, the anger bubbling up inside her. “Not when she is engaged to another.”

“That guy?” Hiratao laughed, shaking his head and motioning towards Miho’s shop. “Honey, I don’t think you want him, he looks like damaged goods.”

“He’s more of a man than you ever will be,” Katara challenged, still not taking her eyes away from Hiratao. The other soldiers were coming closer, each one letting out an “ooh” in response to Katara’s statement. 

Hiratao just raised his eyebrows, grinning even more. “Would you like me to prove it?”

“No.” Katara felt the tightness in her chest, the slow building fear coursing through her nerves. She wondered if she could reach into Hiratao’s veins, feel the way his blood coursed through his body as she controlled him; but she could not risk it, no matter how badly she wanted to hurt him. 

“I can show you what a real man is like,” Hiratao repeated, leaning in closer to her so that his face was inches from her. Katara could smell alcohol on his breath; these soldiers weren’t even questioning the villagers or attempting to make arrests, they were a mere scare tactic used to make the village fall into line. 

“Please leave me alone,” she asked, trying to keep her voice even. She took a step back, but Hiratao reached out and grabbed her left wrist, holding it in his grasp tightly. “Let go, please.”

“Let me show you what I can do,” he purred again, bringing his face closer to her as the other soldiers laughed behind him.

Without thinking, Katara spit at him, a blob of saliva landing right under Hiratao’s eye. His eyes turned stormy, his face bright red as he used his free hand to wipe her spit away.

“You  _ bitch, _ ” he hissed, his hand turning hot around her wrist, causing Katara to wince. “You’re going to pay for that. No one says no to me.”

Before she knew what was happening, she felt Hiratoa’s hand burning her wrist, causing Katara to cry out in pain. He tugged at her sharply, causing Katara to slide on the mud. The bag of spices fell from her grasp, the containers spilling on the ground as Hiratao dragged Katara off the path and towards a small alley. Katara clawed at his hand that continued to burn her wrist, silent tears falling from her eyes. She could already feel blisters forming on her skin and when he tightened his grip she cried out again.

“Let’s try this again,” Hiratao hissed, pushing Katara face first against the wall of one of the stores. He twisted Katara’s arm to her back, grabbing her free hand with his and holding it to the wall. “You’re going to give me what I want, and your pretty boy won’t be able to save you.”

Katara closed her eyes as Hiratao pressed himself up against her. He released her hand that was up against the wall, his breath hot against her neck. His hand went to her waist, slowly making its way up her ribs, underneath her top. She bit her lip, desperate to get him off of her, but also afraid of exposing herself as a waterbender. The pain in her wrist subsided as Hiratao stopped burning her skin.

“Now, are you going to be a good girl?” he whispered into her ear. Katara just squeezed her eyes shut as she felt his hand move down her stomach.

“Jun!” someone called out, causing Hiratao to jump slightly. “Get off of her!”

Suddenly, Hiratao was pulled away from her, his hand releasing her wrist as he turned to face whoever had interrupted him. Katara slid against the wall, cradling her burnt wrist in her opposite hand, tears blurring her vision. 

“Well, well,” Hiratao exclaimed with amusement in his voice. “If it isn’t the fiance.”

Katara looked up to see Zuko standing there, his hands balled in fists as he glared at Hiratao, his eyes dark. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Zuko snapped, taking a step closer to Hiratao. 

“Showing your girl that she deserves better than someone like you,” Hiratao smirked, waving his hand. “You think you’re so tough?”

Zuko stood silent as Hiratao just continued laughing. 

“Get out of here,” Hiratao told Zuko, walking back to Katara. He grabbed Katara’s upper arm and pulled her up sharply, causing Katara to hiss in pain. “Let me have my fun with her, and then you can have her back.”

Zuko took another step forward. “Get away from her.”

“Listen, if you let me do what I want with her, I’ll make sure we leave your aunt’s store alone,” Hiratao exclaimed, gripping Katara’s arm harder. 

A small whimper escaped her lips as she looked at Zuko, her heart beating in her throat.  _ Safe with you, I’m supposed to be safe with you. _

“I’m warning you,” Zuko growled, taking another step forward. 

“Or what?” Hiratao smirked, throwing Katara down in the mud. 

She landed with a humph, a sharp pain in her ribs when she landed on a misplaced rock. Her face still down, she heard a  _ smack  _ coming from above her and the sound of shouting. Lifting her head, she could make out Zuko and Hiratao’s forms through the rain, but she could not tell who was who. 

The sound of running and more shouting before Katara felt a tepid hand on her shoulder.

“Jun?” It was Miho, sliding a soothing hand down Katara’s back. “Jun, are you okay?”

Katara looked up, making eye contact with Miho. She swallowed and nodded, wincing at the new pains on her body. With a click of her tongue, Miho helped Katara stand up. When she had her bearings, Katara was able to see Zuko and Hiratao, each one being held back by a soldier. Blood streamed down Hiratao’s nose; it was most definitely broken. Zuko had a bruise forming on his good cheek. 

“How dare you attack a soldier!” the leader was yelling at Zuko, his face contorted with anger. “You should be punished for being insubordinate!” 

“ _ He  _ should be punished?” Miho retorted, leading Katara away from the wall, an arm around her waist to hold her up. With her free hand, she pointed at Hiratao who was pulling himself away from the soldier holding him back. “ _ He’s  _ the one who should be punished!”

The leader rounded on Miho, taking long strides over to her and standing over her menacingly. “Hiratao did nothing wrong.”

“Nothing wrong!” Miho scoffed, motioning with her chin towards Katara. “He basically brutalized my nephew’s fiance!” 

The leader eyed Katara up and down, narrowing his eyes at Miho. “I see nothing wrong with her.”

Miho went to retort again, but Katara just placed a hand on the old woman’s shoulder and shook her head. There was no point in fighting. 

“That little bitch wanted it!” Hiratao exclaimed, wiping the blood off his face with the back of his hand, smearing it under his nose. If anything, he looked more barbaric than before. 

“Well I’m not going to let you hurt the person I love just so you can have a little fun!” Zuko yelled, trying to launch himself towards Hiratao, but the soldier holding him just tightened his hold on Zuko’s arms. 

Katara stopped breathing at Zuko’s words, feeling the way her throat closed as she tried to take a breath. She stared at him, her whole body shaking as Miho just looked on at the scene.

“All this yelling is accomplishing nothing,” Miho claimed. “You think my nephew should be punished for trying to save Jun, I think that soldier is in the wrong.”

“You dare challenge my soldier’s integrity?” the leader scowled, facing Miho once more. 

“I do believe what your soldier just attempted is called ‘rape’,” Miho explained calmly, her face passive. “So, yes, I do challenge your soldier’s integrity.”

Zuko released himself from the soldier’s grasp, breathing heavy as he just glared at Hiratao. As he stared back, Hiratao’s fists became slowly encompassed in flames. 

“Go home,” Miho told Katara, pulling her arm away from her. “Let Lee and I handle this.”

“But -” Katara started, but Miho cut her off.

“ _ Go _ , this is going to get messy,” Miho continued, gently pushing Katara towards the opening of the alley. “Go and don’t look back.”

Katara nodded, but she took another look at Zuko who was now face to face with Hiratao, his chest heaving as he stared at the soldier with hatred clear in his eyes. She looked back at Miho who just motioned with her hands for Katara to leave, giving her a reassuring smile. Without looking back, Katara slowly walked out from the alley and once she reached the path, she broke out into a sprint. Each step caused a small pinch of pain in her ribs and her left wrist hurt so badly it was almost numb.

Once she reached the house, she slammed the door open and ran inside, barely registering whether she closed the front door behind her or not. Unsure of what to do, Katara ran towards the washroom, collapsing on the floor as she sobbed. She cradled her wrist once again, the searing pain coursing through her body. If she wanted to risk getting caught, she would have healed it right then and there, but Katara knew the risks far outweighed the benefits.

Leaning up against a wall, Katara pulled her knees into her chest, her whole body shaking as she thought of Hiratao’s body pressed up against her. The helpless feeling clawed at her stomach, threatening to come out again. Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to forget the way Hiratao grabbed her, the way his hot breath felt against her neck. 

If only she could have fought back, if only she could have  _ controlled  _ him the way she did the captain of the Southern Raiders. How would he like being taken advantage of?

Suddenly, the front door slammed open again and Katara couldn’t help but think the soldiers found her, that they were here to finish what they started. Her heart tightened in her chest as she tried to silence herself. 

“Katara!” came Zuko’s voice from the kitchen. “Katara, it’s me! Just me!”

Katara just started sobbing harder, unable to make any other sound. With her good hand, she hit the washroom door to signal her location, and she heard Zuko’s footsteps advance. Without knocking, Zuko opened the door, eyes falling on Katara sitting on the floor. 

“ _ Fuck _ , Katara, I am so sorry,” he said, kneeling down next to her and wrapping his arms around her as best he could, pulling her closer to him. “I’m so, so, sorry.”

Unable to say anything, Katara just cried into him, feeling his arms around her. His chin rested on her head as he whispered words of assurance. 

Miho suddenly appeared at the door, hands on her hips as she looked down. “Jun, we need to patch you up. Come on, let’s go.”

Zuko helped Katara stand and they followed Miho into her small bedroom. Her bed sat cramped in the corner of the room, a dresser pressed up against the foot of the bed. A mirror hung next to the door across from the bed. When Zuko sat Katara on the bed, she caught her reflection in the mirror, noting her wild hair and mud smeared on her cheek. Her eyes were red and puffy, and Katara hated it. 

“Lee, please get the salve and some bandages in the washroom,” Miho instructed, sitting down next to Katara and taking her burnt wrist tentatively in her hands. “They should be in the cupboard under the basin.”

“Yes, yes, I’ll be right back,” Zuko replied, disappearing out of the room. 

Miho did her best to avoid hurting Katara further as she inspected the burn on her wrist. As she predicted, it bubbled in areas, red and angry. When Miho pressed on a section on her burnt skin, Katara hissed in pain. Zuko reappeared, handing Miho the salve and the bandages. 

Katara sat as still as she could as Miho went to apply the salve to her burn, but she watched as Zuko paced back and forth, throwing worried glances at Katara as he did.

“Lee,” Miho said calmly, pausing her work. “Why don’t you go make some tea while I take care of Jun. Close the door on your way out.”

Zuko just looked at Katara, but she nodded in agreement. 

“Go,” she assured him. “I’ll be fine with Miho.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay,” Zuko replied. He made his way out the room, closing the door behind him as Miho had told him to do. 

Miho got back to work applying the soothing salve to Katara’s wrist, her eyebrows knit in concentration. When she was done with the salve, Katara watched the older woman’s nimble fingers wrap the bandages around her wrist with precision. 

“Miho,” Katara said suddenly. “What - what happened when I left?”

Sighing, Miho wrapped up the extra bandage, reaching with her arm to place it on the dresser. “The soldiers decided that because I would not let them punish Lee accordingly, the next best punishment was to ransack my shop.”

“Oh, Miho, I’m so sorry,” Katara cried, trying to place a hand on Miho’s arm, but Miho just waved her away.

“I don’t care about my shop,” Miho told her, shaking her head. “Fruits and vegetables, furniture, everything that makes a shop - those can all be replaced. I’ll be alright.” 

“But that shop is your entire livelihood, isn’t it?” Katara asked. 

Miho let out a hollow laugh. “Maybe, but I was thinking of retiring soon anyways.”

“Miho, I’m sorry,” Katara repeated, looking down at the burn on her arm. It still hurt, but not as badly as it did. If Katara waited any longer, she was sure it would scar. 

“For what?” Miho asked incredulously. “Almost getting taken advantage of by a soldier? I told you, Jun, some men think they’re owed sex from women.”

“No, not that,” Katara replied, shaking her head, though the deep seated feeling of shame still sat in Katara’s mind. “For - for causing you so much pain. For sticking my nose in places it doesn’t belong.”

“All I care about is that you’re okay,” Miho said softly, placing a hand on Katara’s shoulder and giving it an affectionate squeeze. “Like I said, material goods can be replaced, but people? Not so much.”

Another sob caught in Katara’s throat, but she tried to swallow it down. She was done crying for today. 

“I do have to say one thing, though,” Miho said. Katara looked up to see the older woman smiling warmly at her. “I’ve never seen someone love another so fiercely as Lee loves you.”

“He doesn’t - we’re not even - he doesn’t love me,” Katara stammered, feeling her face go bright red. Miho chuckled, this time moving closer to Katara and fully wrapping her arm around Katara’s shoulder and bringing her in for a one armed hug. 

“Jun, I’ve lived for many years,” Miho explained as Katara rested her head on Miho’s shoulder, “and I’ve met a lot of people. You might not see it, but I can assure you that that boy loves you whether he realizes it or not. It’s what he told the soldiers, is it not?” 

“Well, yes, but he was just saying that because he has a role to play,” Katara tried to explain, feeling Miho chuckle again. “He - you told the soldiers we were engaged, of course he’s going to pretend.”

“Perhaps,” Miho mused. “I’m sorry this happened to you, Jun.”

“I - I usually fight back,” Katara replied solemnly, hanging her head in shame. 

“It’s okay that you didn’t.” Miho gave Katara another affectionate squeeze before pulling her arm away and standing up. “I’m going to check on Lee. He has a pretty nasty bruise forming on his cheek, and I think a cracked rib.” Katara opened her mouth in surprise, but Miho just raised her hand to stop her. “One of the soldiers pushed him down and kicked him after you left. He’s alive, and that’s all that matters.”

Katara nodded, fingers brushing the bandage on the opposite wrist. Miho made her way out of the room, leaving Katara alone with her thoughts.

Out in the kitchen, Zuko paced back and forth as he waited for the water to boil. The cloak he usually wore lay discarded on the floor as he had too much adrenaline to actually bend down and place it somewhere more appropriate. He kept thinking of Katara, the way she was pressed up against the wall of the store, the way she looked at him with so much pain and fear. He promised to keep her safe, and he couldn’t even do that. 

Nervously, he ran his hands through his hair, tugging at the roots as he replayed the scene over and over again in his mind. What if he hadn’t come out fast enough? What if he had been too late?

“Lee?” came Miho’s voice from her bedroom door. “Are you alright?”

Zuko paused, standing in the middle of the room, his fingers still curled into his hair as he stared at Miho. 

“No, I suppose not,” she sighed, walking over to Zuko and placing a gentle hand on his arm. “Go sit, I’ll finish with the tea and then take a look at your injuries.”

“I’m fine,” he told her, finally letting his hands drop to his sides. He could already feel the bruise forming on his ribs along with the one on his cheek, but he didn’t care. 

“If that’s how you feel,” Miho stated, taking the teapot off of the flames. “Go sit, I’ll be right over.”

“Jun?” Zuko asked, feeling a lump in his throat as he thought of Katara by herself. 

“She’ll be fine,” Miho assured him gently. “I’m giving her some time to process. I’m sure when she’s ready, she’ll come out.”

Zuko nodded and went over to the living area, slowly sinking into a cushion and crossing his legs. Resting his elbows on his knees, he put his face in his hands, digging the palms of his hands into his eyes. All he could see was Katara bruised and battered laying on the ground. Would Katara ever forgive him?

A moment later, Miho placed a cup of tea next to Zuko on the floor. She then took a seat across from him, mirroring his position and crossing her legs as she held her own tea in her hands. Taking a sip, she watched Zuko as he sighed and looked up at her.

“If I hadn’t stopped him, I don’t think I would ever forgive myself,” Zuko told Miho, feeling miserable. 

“Why’s that?” Miho asked, raising a thin eyebrow at him.

“I - I promised her brother I would keep her safe,” Zuko explained, thinking of how Sokka would react once he found what happened. 

“But you did keep her safe,” Miho pointed out, holding her cup up as a point of emphasis. “She might be a little bruised up, but besides that she’s physically fine. It might take her some time to recover emotionally though.”

“I’ll be with her for that aspect.” Zuko finally picked up his own cup of tea, wrapping his hands around it to feel its warmth. Miho gave him a small, knowing smile over her own cup of tea. “What?”

“Nothing,” Miho replied, shrugging a shoulder. “It’s just refreshing to see two people so wholly dedicated to one another, that’s all.”

“Well, we weren’t always this way,” Zuko sighed. “I wouldn’t say we’re dedicated but… we’re friends now at least.”

“You love her.” It wasn’t a question, but a simple statement that caused Zuko to almost jump up off the cushion. Instead, he blinked at the old woman who just smirked in reply. 

“I - I don’t know what you mean,” Zuko stated, avoiding eye contact with Miho.

“You said so yourself, you weren’t going to let anyone hurt the one you love,” Miho commented, repeating Zuko’s words back to him. “I heard it with my own two ears.”

“But I was just saying that because I was playing a part,” Zuko argued, finally looking up at her. “You told the soldiers I was your nephew and Ka - Jun was my betrothed. You said that was the only way to get them to back off.”

Miho raised both eyebrows at Zuko’s slip of the tongue, but said nothing about it. “Sure, you had a part to play, but I don’t think you can separate the role from your real feelings.”

“But -” That was all Zuko was able to get out as Miho’s bedroom door opened and Katara slipped out, eyes falling on Miho and Zuko on the floor. Zuko stood up quickly, watching her.

“I - I don’t want to be alone,” Katara stammered, arms wrapped around herself as if trying to protect herself from any more dangers. 

“Join us,” Miho suggested, waving Katara over. “Lee, get Jun some tea. I think we have some things to discuss.”

Katara joined Miho on the floor as Zuko went and fetched her a cup of tea. Once he was done, he handed Katara her cup before sitting down next to her, their knees touching. 

“I think it’s time we all talk,” Miho said, placing her cup on the floor in front of her. “I know you two haven’t been completely honest with me about who you are and what you’re doing here. I understand you are wary and that you risk exposing yourselves, but I need you to know that I will help you in any way that I can.”

Zuko and Katara glanced at each other, Katara’s eyebrows furrowed in thought. She bit her lip as she and Zuko made eye contact, and without even saying anything Zuko could tell what she was thinking. There really wasn’t much left to lose, especially after what Miho’s done for them the past few days. 

“What do you want to know, then?” Zuko asked, addressing Miho. 

“Who are you?” Miho prompted. 

Taking a deep breath, Zuko took another look at Katara before finally facing Miho. “My name is Prince Zuko, son of Lady Ursa and Fire Lord Ozai.”

“I’ve heard the horror stories about how Ozai treats those around him,” Miho stated, staring at Zuko’s scar. “I’m sorry to hear that they’re true.”

“Yeah, me too,”Zuko scoffed, brushing the bottom of his scar with his fingers. 

“And how did you get here?” Miho continued. “Why are you  _ here  _ and not in Caldera City with your father?”

“I was banished many years ago,” Zuko explained. “Ah, that’s a long story, but I was welcomed back a few months ago and then decided to leave again. Now I’m the Fire Nation’s biggest traitor.” 

Miho grunted. “Not the worst thing to be, I guess.”

“No, I suppose not,” Zuko agreed. 

Miho turned to Katara. “And you?”

“My name is Katara of the Southern Water Tribe,” Katara replied quietly, gripping the cup in her hand. Without thinking, Zuko placed a hand on her knee.

“Southern Water Tribe?” Miho asked, tilting her head to the side in question. “So, you knew about Yon Rha?”

“Yes,” Katara replied. “Well, not until recently. He killed my mother.”

“The last Southern waterbender?” Miho asked, pouting slightly.

“No.” Katara shook her head and placed the cup on the floor. Closing her eyes, Katara waved her hand over the cup, pulling at the tea and bringing up and over. Miho watched intently as Katara dropped the tea back into the cup with a small splash. 

“ _ You  _ were the last waterbender,” Miho said with a deep breath. “He was after  _ you _ .”

“She died to protect me,” Katara explained slowly, Zuko’s hand tightening on her knee. “He was a monster and he took her away from me.”

“I don’t blame you for seeking revenge,” Miho told her. “I don’t blame you one bit.”

Katara and Zuko were quiet, both unable to look at Miho any longer. To her credit, she just glanced at them back and forth before sighing deeply and standing up. 

“Well, if everything you told me is true, then we need to get you off this island as soon as possible,” Miho stated, scratching at her head. She pointed to Katara’s wrist. “Can you heal?”

“Yes, but I don’t want to risk it,” Katara replied, looking down at her wrist. 

“If you keep the bandage around your wrist, no one will be the wiser,” Miho told her. “I suggest you heal all hidden bruises that way your journey home is easier.”

“And what are you going to do?” Zuko asked, finally removing his hand from Katara’s knee and raising his eyebrow at Miho. 

“I’m going to ask Kimi when he can leave,” Miho explained, already making her way to the front door. “If we’re lucky, this rain is done by tomorrow and we can get you on a boat home to your friends.”

Miho had just placed her hand on the door when she paused, turning back to look at the two kids sitting on the floor.

“How did the banished prince of the Fire Nation and a waterbender from the Southern Water Tribe meet?” 

Zuko and Katara glanced at each other again before Zuko looked up at Miho, a grin on his face. “That story might be a little bit harder to explain.”

“But we’re both with the Avatar, if that helps,” Katara offered, also giving Miho a small smile. 

Miho started laughing. “Oh, yes, that does help! Well, looks like we  _ really  _ need to get you out of here. I should be back within the hour. If not… don’t come looking for me.”

With that, she opened the door and walked out, leaving Zuko and Katara alone. 

“Zuko, I -”

“Katara, there’s something -”

They stopped, each turning red at the fact that they tried to speak at the same time. Zuko rubbed the back of his neck, grinning at Katara.

“You - you first,” he told her, motioning with her hand to continue. 

“I was just going to say thank you,” Katara told him, fiddling with the cup in her hand. “I didn’t - there was a small part of me that thought - just, thank you.”

“I wasn’t going to let him hurt you, Katara,” Zuko said softly. “Remember what I told you?”

“I’m safe with you,” Katara murmured, still looking down at her tea. “How did you know?”

“A villager was walking to the shop when he saw the soldiers approach you,” Zuko explained. “He saw Hiratao drag you away and he ran into the shop yelling that I needed to do something.”

“I’ll have to be sure to thank him too then,” Katara joked lightly, finally looking at Zuko. There was no pain or fear in her eyes, there was no grace or elegance. Zuko couldn’t tell what Katara was thinking, but he could see the sadness below the surface.

Zuko swallowed. “Yeah, I guess you do.”

“What were you going to say?” Katara asked, placing her cup on the ground and leaning back on her hands. As soon as she put weight on her burnt arm, though, she winced and sat back up. “Ouch, maybe Miho was right and I should heal this.”

“Might be a good idea,” Zuko offered. 

Katara nodded and stood up, grabbing her cup as she did. Glancing down at Zuko, she said, “Coming? I can heal you as well.”

“Oh, sure, okay,” Zuko said, also standing up. He and Katara placed their cups on the low table before he followed Katara into the washroom. 

Leaning against the counter, Zuko watched as Katara healed her wrist first, watching as the water glowed blue around her, the skin patching itself up. Though healed, her wrist was still slightly pink, evidence of what happened still clear on her skin. When she was done, she rewrapped her wrist, hiding her work. 

“Ready?” she asked Zuko, motioning to his tunic. “Miho told me you might have a bruised rib.”

“Yeah.” Zuko lifted his tunic, looking down at his ribs to find it bruised black and blue. When Katara placed a gentle hand on his bruised rib, he winced but didn’t move away. Without moving, he watched as brought the water to him, still glowing blue around her hands. It was a strange feeling, being healed by a waterbender; he could feel the way his muscles pulled, almost stitching themselves back up. 

“So, what were you going to say?” Katara asked him, still focused on his ribs, her eyes lit up by the glow of the water.

“Nothing,” Zuko replied. “It was nothing. Just that I’m glad that you’re safe.”

Katara paused and looked up at him, her face unreadable. “Yeah. Me too.”

“At least Sokka won’t have an excuse to kill me now,” Zuko teased quickly, watching as Katara broke out into a grin.

“He might be a little upset by that,” Katara teased back, resuming her work healing Zuko. 

What Zuko didn’t tell her is that Miho might have been right. 


	11. where's your heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of a shorter chapter since the previous chapter was so long. Also, Zuko and Katara really had a life changing field trip and immediately decided it was an invitation to invade each other's personal space. Love that for them.

An hour had almost passed and Miho still had not returned. 

Katara and Zuko sat at the kitchen table across from each other, both of them staring at the front door in anticipation. 

“She said not to go after her,” Katara exclaimed, rapping her knuckles on the table trying to distract herself from the anxiety slowly building up inside her. “But what if something happened to her? What if the soldiers are still mad about how she yelled at them?”

“She’s a tough woman,” Zuko assured her, but Katara could hear the fear in his voice too. “I’m sure she’s fine, Katara, promise.”

Katara was about to retort when the front door opened and Miho walked through, earning herself a sigh of relief from both Zuko and Katara. Amused, she looked at them, laughing as she shook her head. 

“What, did you think I died?” Miho stated sarcastically, walking into the kitchen. “Kimi and I were just going over the plan in detail. The rain should let up tomorrow, based on the sky. He said he’ll be ready right after sunrise to sail out.”

“Sunrise?” Katara asked, making a face at Miho. She hated waking up so early in the morning.

Miho raised her eyebrows at her. “Don’t like waking up early, do you?”

“Nope,” Zuko answered, chuckling. “She’s more of a stay up late kind of girl.”

Katara shot him a look before turning back to face Miho. “It’s fine, anything to get us back to our friends as soon as possible. Where did Kimi say he was going?”

“He’s not going very far out,” Miho explained, taking a seat next to Katara. “He’ll be closer to Capital Island, but you’d still have a few more days of travel to get to… wherever you’re going.”

“Ember Island,” Zuko told her. “We’re hoping our friends are on Ember Island.”

“Then you’d have another day or two of travel, then,” Miho stated. “We have to make sure we can get you to the dock without being seen. I’m not sure the soldiers are fond of either of you right now.”

“We can handle ourselves,” Zuko assured Miho. “It’s you we’re worried about.”

Miho scoffed. “Me? Oh, I’m tougher than I look, Prince Zuko, you don’t need to worry about me.”

“We still can, though, can’t we?” Katara asked, bumping her shoulder against Miho’s. The older woman rolled her eyes, but bumped Katara back. 

“You two should probably pack up your belongings,” Miho told them. “You have an early morning, so it might be good to try and get some rest now.”

“That’s a good idea,” Zuko said, standing up from the table and looking outside the window. “It seems like the rain might actually let up soon.”

Katara looked outside too, noting the way the trees swayed gently in the wind. Though the rain scattered against the house, no house shattering thunder boomed. They were finally heading to their friends.

As they walked upstairs, Katara behind Zuko, Katara pictured her friends’ faces, the way they would beam when they finally saw them. If only she could speed up time so that they could be finally reunited, but for now she would settle with Zuko’s company.

Still, she could not get what Miho said out of her head, the way she told Katara that Zuko loved her. There was no way that Zuko  _ loved  _ her, he was probably just looking out for her. Sure, he had promised that he would protect her, but that was because he had promised Sokka he would get her home safe. Plus, they were finally starting to actually get used to each other. 

In the room, Zuko knelt next to the bed, reaching underneath and pulling out the bag that contained Katara’s clothes as well as his broadswords.

“If only I had these on me today,” he said lightly, unsheathing one of the swords to check it. “That would have saved us a lot more trouble.”

“No, it would have gotten you killed,” Katara stated, sitting down on the bed and peering down at him. 

Zuko shrugged. “Maybe. Not if I killed him first.”

“I - yes, I suppose so,” Katara replied, biting her lip. “Then we’d both be wanted fugitives.”

“Katara…” Zuko started, sheathing his sword and placing it down on the floor. He knelt in front of her, placing his elbows on her knees so that they were face to face. “You’re still hurting from this. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I don’t know,” Katara admitted. “I know I  _ should  _ keep talking about it, but I don’t know how to sift through all of the emotions that I’m feeling. Is it pride, is it regret? I don’t know.”

“You don’t have to understand how you’re feeling all the time,” Zuko said, leaning closer to her to rest his chin on his fist. “But I’m here if you need help figuring it out.”

“I know you are, and I really appreciate it,” Katara told him. 

Without saying anything, Zuko leaned back onto his feet so that he was no longer invading her space. He reached into his pocket and pulled out Katara’s necklace, holding it out to her.

“Told you I would keep it safe,” he told her, placing the necklace in her palm and curling her fingers around it with his own. 

“You had it on you this whole time?” Katara asked, Zuko’s hand still wrapped around hers as she felt the cool pendant in the palm of her hand. 

Zuko shrugged. “Where else was I going to put it? I promised you I’d keep it safe, and what better way to do that than just have it in my pocket.”

“Why are you giving it to me now, though?” Katara asked as Zuko removed his hand from her and stood up. “We don’t leave until tomorrow, and who knows how much longer we’ll have to hide.”

“Because you need it tonight,” Zuko replied, sitting on the bed next to her. “You don’t have to wear it, but I thought it would give you some comfort after everything that’s happened.”

Katara swallowed, staring down at the necklace in her hand, feeling the grooves with the pads of her fingers. 

“And, like I said, you can talk to me about it too,” Zuko continued, moving closer to her so that his thigh was pressed up against hers. “But only if you want to.”

“I think - I think I just hate how helpless he made me feel,” Katara muttered. “Any other time I would have fought back, but I just  _ didn’t _ , and I’m just so angry with myself.”

“Katara, it’s not your fault this happened,” Zuko assured her, placing an arm around her shoulders and bringing her closer to him. Her head fell on his shoulder, but she still stared down at the necklace in her hand. 

“I’ve killed someone, Zuko,” Katara commented, her thumb stroking one of the leather straps. “And I would have done it again if I wasn’t about to risk our lives.”

“Killing someone isn’t part of your identity, Katara.” His head rested on top of hers, his hand stroking her arm gently. “And neither is freezing in the face of danger.”

“No, I suppose not,” Katara muttered, taking a deep breath in. “So much has happened this past week and it’s all so much pressure.”

“But you have me,” Zuko pointed out.

Katara swallowed. “Yes, I have you.”

A beat.

“Did you mean it?” Katara asked, pulling her head away from him so that she could at him. 

Zuko’s brow furrowed. “Mean what?” 

“That you -” Katara paused. That he loved her? 

“That I… what?” Zuko prompted, removing his arm from around her and moving back so that he could face her completely. 

“That you wouldn’t let anyone hurt me,” Katara said instead.

“I know you can handle yourself, Katara,” he explained, “but yeah, I meant it. Again, I don’t want to give Sokka a reason to kill me.”

His tone turned teasing as he gave her an affectionate punch on the shoulder. For some reason, deep down, Katara could tell he was deflecting, but she didn’t push any further. 

Instead, she nodded and moved away from him towards her side of the bed they shared. Her mother’s necklace still in her hand, she laid down and watched Zuko get up and move around the room. He placed the bag and his broadswords next to the door, ready for departure. The cloak he usually wore was hung up on the end of the bed, as if Zuko was getting ready for a quick exit. 

When he was done, he got into the bed, but sat up against the headboard, hands folded over his stomach, deep in thought. This whole time, Katara kept her eyes on him.

“Are you okay?” she asked, placing a hand on his arm to get his attention.

“We’re finally leaving, Katara,” he replied. “But is it strange if I said I’m worried about leaving?”

“What do you mean?” she asked, rolling over onto her side, one hand supporting her head so that she could look up at him.

“We’re one step closer to the comet,” Zuko stated, running a hand through his hair. “What happens next?”

“I don’t think I have a solid answer to that question, Zuko,” Katara replied honestly, causing Zuko to sigh and slide down further into bed so that he was laying on his back. “Hey, we’re still a team though, right?”

Zuko rolled over onto his side, a tiny smile on his face. “Did you want to still be a team?”

“It’s been a few days, but I think I realized that I don’t think I want anyone else to be by my side,” Katara admitted, Zuko’s smile widening at her comment. 

“Yeah, I feel the same way,” Zuko replied. “So, what does that mean?” 

“It means,” Katara said firmly, scooting a bit closer to him, “that I trust you.”

“Yeah?” Zuko’s eyes were wide as he stared at her, watching her as she returned his smile. 

“Yeah, I do,” Katara confirmed. “It - it took me a long time, but - I do.”

“Okay,” Zuko replied. “I trust you too.”

“Even though I’ve kicked your ass plenty of times?” Katara teased, causing Zuko to laugh.

“Okay,  _ yes,  _ even though you’ve kicked my ass plenty of times,” Zuko replied, poking her ribs. “But I’ve won a couple times!”

“Have you?” Katara stated, poking him in return. 

“I can’t believe we’re having this conversation!” Zuko exclaimed, rolling back onto his back and pinching the bridge of his nose. 

Katara laughed, knowing she successfully pushed his buttons enough. She liked being his friend and enjoyed having him with her by her side. These past few nights exchanging stories and having meaningful conversations felt oddly comforting to Katara, especially since she had never expected to be here with Zuko in this exact position. 

_ But did he mean it when he said he loved me?  _ Katara thought to herself as Zuko huffed and turned his head to look at her once more, an amused grin on his face. 

“Get some sleep,” he told her. “Miho said we need to be up early, and I know if you don’t sleep now you’re going to be grumpy tomorrow morning.”

“Why, because I rise with the moon?” she challenged playfully, moving even closer to him. 

Zuko groaned. “Not one of my smoothest moments, there, huh?”

“Hey, you actually won that fight, though,” Katara pointed out. 

“Not after you froze me to a wall of ice,” Zuko returned, rolling his eyes. “I only got you because -”

“You rise with the sun,” Katara finished, laughing as Zuko groaned again.

“I take it back,” Zuko claimed, holding his hands up in the air for Katara to see. “I don’t want to be on your team anymore. Not if it comes with your constant teasing.”

“Too late!” Katara exclaimed, grabbing one of his hands and pulling it down. “You’re stuck with me now, whether you like it or not.”

“I guess I don’t  _ hate  _ it,” Zuko replied, lacing his fingers through her own absentmindedly and placing their hands between them. “There are worse people to be stuck with.”

Katara didn’t reply, just grinned at him, feeling as his thumb stroked her own. Her mother’s necklace was still in her opposite hand, warm against her sweaty palm. 

Neither, it seemed, knew what to say as they settled in, their fingers still laced together between them. Next to her, Zuko closed his eyes and released a sigh before falling silent. Following his example, Katara closed her eyes too, feeling the fatigue from a full day pull at her eyelids. 

After about an hour and a half, she was finally on the edge of sleep, sweet memories of her childhood running through her dreams until an image flashed before her. Hiratao’s face lingered next to her, smirking as his hands made their way down her body. She could still feel him pressed into her, the way her fear penetrated her body.

“No!” she yelled, opening her eyes and sitting up quickly, a sharp pain in her ribs like a shadow. 

“Katara?” Zuko sounded exhausted as he stared at her through slits, not fully awake. “Katara, are you okay?”

“I - no, I’m not,” she admitted. Zuko let go of her hand, placing his own on her back. 

“Want to talk about it?” he asked her, fully awake now as he rubbed circles around her back slowly. 

“It was a nightmare,” Katara told him. “I’ve been having a lot lately, and this time it was about what happened today. The past few days they’ve been about Yon Rha, so I guess… I don’t know.”

“Neither are very pleasant,” Zuko told her seriously. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too.” 

As Katara went to lay back down, Zuko’s arm slid around her waist as he pulled her closer to him. Adjusting herself, Katara laid on her side, settling her head on Zuko’s shoulder so that his chin rested on her head. She slid her arm over his stomach, holding him tightly. Her mother’s necklace dangled from her hand against Zuko’s side. 

“I’ve got you, Katara,” he whispered. 

“I know,” she whispered back, feeling his opposite hand rest on her arm atop his stomach. 

When she finally fell back asleep, nightmares no longer plagued her. Instead, Zuko’s words reverberated in her mind, playing over and over again. 


	12. end of my rope

A loud knock at the door jolted Katara and Zuko awake, forcing them apart as they both jumped out of bed and got into a fighting stance. 

“You two awake yet?!” Miho called, banging on the door once more. 

Both Zuko and Katara sighed at the old woman’s voice. From where she was, Katara could see that it was still dark outside the window, causing her to shudder. The absence of the sound of rain rattling against the side of the house was also clear. 

“Come on!” Miho called again. “If you want to get out of here, get ready!”

“We’re awake, Miho!” Zuko called back, looking back at Katara. “Ready?”

Katara nodded and made her way around the bed. She picked up the bag at the door as Zuko grabbed his broadswords and strapped them to his back. Before opening the door, he threw his cloak around his shoulders to hide the broadswords and pulled the hood up over his head. 

“Do you want me to hold your necklace again?” he asked her, motioning towards Katara’s hand that still held the necklace. 

“Yes, please,” Katara replied, passing the necklace to Zuko and watching as he placed it in his pocket once more. 

“All right,” Zuko told her, opening the door to the small landing, “let’s get back to the others.”

Katara followed Zuko downstairs where Miho was now in the kitchen preparing a bag of food: various fruits, vegetables, and tea leaves were all packed into the small pack that burst at the seams. 

“For your journey,” Miho told them, shoving the bag into Zuko’s arms. “Just in case.”

“You really didn’t have to,” Zuko told her, but Miho waved her hand at him. “Thank you, then.”

“Hmm,” Miho hummed, looking the two up and down. “Seems like you’re ready to go.”

“I think we’re just desperate to get back to our friends,” Katara stated, her bag of clothes over her shoulder. 

Miho nodded and opened the front door, motioning for Katara and Zuko to go first. Once outside, she motioned for them to follow her, but instead of heading towards the main path, she led them further into the wooded area that surrounded them. It was still dark out, the sun still not awake. 

“We need to make sure we’re not seen,” she told them, glancing around her. “Those soldiers are not happy with either of you and I just want to get you out of here as safely as possible.”

“How much longer do you think they’re going to occupy the village?” Zuko asked, falling into step next to Miho.

“Well, at first I assumed they were desperate to find Yon Rha’s killer,” Miho explained with a heavy sigh. “But I don’t think they care about that anymore.”

“They just want to make a mess,” Katara spat, narrowing her eyes towards where she knew the soldiers liked to loiter in town. She wondered if they were in their usual spot now. She wondered if they found another young woman to whistle at. 

“Humph,” Miho grunted. “The day those soldiers leave I’m going to throw the biggest party this island has ever seen.”

“I promise, Miho, I’ll get them out when I can,” Zuko promised, placing a hand on the old woman’s shoulder. 

Miho paused and stared up at Zuko with such intensity he took a step back. Squinting at him, she said, “I can already tell that you are nothing like your father. When you are Fire Lord, the Fire Nation will be a much better place to live. I, for one, look forward to seeing you on the throne.”

“I- uh - well - I mean, sure,” Zuko stuttered, his cheeks going bright red.

“Take the compliment, will you?” Miho exclaimed, shaking her head and beginning to walk again. Zuko stayed rooted in place, gaping at her behind her back.

“Zuko?” Katara said, placing a hand on his arm. “Are you okay?”

“Why does she have so much faith in me?” he asked, eyes still on Miho who slowed down and turned to look at them. “She barely knows me.”

“We can talk about that later if you want,” Katara told him, pulling at his arm now. “Come on, before we lose her. She’s surprisingly fast for an old woman.”

Zuko allowed himself to be led by Katara, picking up their pace so that could catch up to Miho. The rest of the walk to the tiny dock was silent, though Katara could practically hear the wheels in Zuko’s head turning. She found herself secretly agreeing with Miho; Katara knew that Zuko was just and kind, but why couldn’t he see it himself? 

Before heading over to Kimi, Miho stopped them, glancing around her once more before waving her hand for Zuko and Katara to follow her. Kimi stood on the dock, checking to make sure everything was on board. When he heard the three approaching, he looked up and waved at them.

“I’m ready whenever you two are ready,” he called to them.

“They’ll be with you in a minute, Kimi!” Miho called back. Placing a hand on her hips, she looked at Katara and Zuko who stood side by side in front of her. “Well, take care of yourself.”

Katara dropped the bag in her hands and threw her arms around Miho, hugging her tightly. Miho jumped at first, but slowly wrapped her own arms around Katara, closing her eyes as the younger girl squeezed her. 

“Thank you for everything, Miho,” Katara exclaimed. “You have no idea how much this means to us.”

“Yes, well,” Miho replied, letting go of Katara and clearing her throat. “I wasn’t about to let you two kill yourselves, now was I?” 

As Katara picked up her bag, Zuko placed a hand on Miho’s shoulder and gave it an affectionate squeeze. Miho placed her hand on his, a tear falling freely from her eye.

“I meant what I said,” she told him. “You two keep the Avatar in line. Tell him that there are people who believe in him. Will you do that for me?”

“Yeah, Miho,” Zuko said quietly. “We’ll do that.”

Miho gave him one last smile before dropping her hand away from his. “Now, get going. Kimi won’t wait forever.”

“Take care of yourself,” Katara told her. 

“I’ll do my best,” Miho replied, giving Katara a smile as well. 

With that, Zuko and Katara made their way onto the small dock where only Kimi’s boat was wading in the water. Zuko went ahead, walking up the gangplank on the small boat without looking back, but Katara stopped, turning her head so that she could see Miho waving at her. Katara waved back before following Zuko on board. 

A minute later, Kimi climbed on after them pushing away from the dock. 

“Well, I don’t actually have a lot of room below deck,” he admitted to them as Miho slowly faded from view. “But I was able to hang two hammocks up in my storage room for you to sleep in.”

“That’s great, Kimi, thank you,” Zuko told him. “We just really appreciate you willing to take us with you.”

“Well, Miho told me that you needed to leave as soon as possible and I don’t ask questions,” Kimi stated honestly. “She doesn’t tell me much, but I trust her.”

“How long until our destination?” Zuko asked. “Actually, where are you heading?”

“Shuhon Island,” Kimi answered, walking by Zuko and Katara to head towards the steering wheel. “It’s one of the better islands for trading. I know it’s often crowded, but maybe it’s closer to wherever it is you’re going.”

“Actually, that’s perfect,” Zuko replied, nodding at Kimi. “We could probably stay the night and then find a ferry to Ember Island.”

“Wait, I’ve been to Shuhon Island before,” Katara told them. Zuko raised his eyebrow at her. “I’ll tell you later.”

“Okay, sure,” Zuko replied, tugging at her arm. “Let’s go place these below the deck and then Kimi we can help you with whatever you need up here.”

“Sounds good to me,” Kimi said, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly as he focused on the seas. 

Katara followed Zuko below deck towards the small storage room where Kimi had set up their sleeping arrangements. Like Kimi said, two hammocks hung from the ceiling apart from each other. Zuko placed the bag of food on one hammock but kept his cloak and broadswords on. Katara placed her bag on the opposite hammock before looking around. Crates of natural resources were stacked against the walls, tightly compacted. 

“Well, we’re one step closer,” Zuko sighed. 

“Yeah, it will be nice to see everyone again,” Katara replied, wrapping her arms around herself. She was cold all of a sudden, a slight chill working its way up her back. 

“Sick of my company already?” Zuko teased, giving her a small shove. 

Katara rolled her eyes. “I will be if you keep doing that.”

Zuko laughed in return. “Okay, fair. Hey, think you can make this trip go faster?”

“What do you mean?” Katara asked, a grin creeping on Zuko’s face. Katara realized what he meant and grinned in return. “Distract Kimi, I’ll do what I can.”

He gave her a thumbs up and disappeared out of the room, Katara close behind him. 

Just as she asked, Zuko did his best to distract Kimi, prattling away with him at the steering wheel or adjusting the sails as Katara stood next to the rails, bending the sea below as discreetly as possible. When he got too close, Katara would adjust herself quickly, pretending to watch the clouds above her. 

Kimi was none the wiser, but if he did notice that the boat was moving at a faster speed, he didn’t say anything. 

At nightfall, Kimi went below deck to rest, allowing Zuko to take the first shift. Though he told Katara she could rest too, she decided to stay above deck with Zuko. 

Instead of focusing on the water down below, though, this time she stared up at the fading moon shining in the dark sky. Closing her eyes, she felt the power of the moon coursing through her veins, waking her up, causing slight jitters throughout her body.

“My uncle told me what happened to the moon,” Zuko said, sidling up next to her and leaning against the rail himself. “At the North Pole, I mean. I was too busy with Zhao to pay attention to everything that was happening.”

Katara sighed. “That whole night was just awful. I know Zhao was desperate, but to mess with the spirits?”

“Only a man who truly lost his way gives into the cruelty deep within him,” Zuko mused, causing Katara to blink at him in surprise. “Ah, my uncle said that once.”

“I would like to meet your uncle one day,” Katara told him, bumping her shoulder to his. “Well, officially, I mean.”

“I think you’d like him,” Zuko replied, looking out to the sea. “I just hope he’s okay wherever he is.”

“I’m sure he’s fine,” Katara assured him, placing a hand on Zuko’s. “From what you told me, he can take care of himself. He  _ is  _ the Dragon of the West, right?”

Zuko winced. “He was in another lifetime. Now he’s a traitor, more so than I am, I think.” 

“Remember what I told you?” Katara reminded him. “Don’t blame yourself for things outside of your control. Maybe this all happened for a reason. Maybe your uncle has something up his sleeve.”

“Knowing uncle, you’re probably right.” Zuko sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked up at the moon. “You knew her, right?”

“Yue,” Katara told him, moving closer to him so that she could rest her head on his arm. “She was extremely kind, and very brave.”

“I don’t think I could ever do what she did,” Zuko admitted. “Sacrifice yourself to save your people? She must have had tremendous courage to make the decision.”

“She did,” Katara agreed. “But maybe you don’t know what you will do until you’re faced with a big decision like that.”

“Yeah, maybe,” Zuko said. 

They stayed silent after that, still staring up at the moon above them. Katara stopped bending, allowing the current to take them at its own pace. 

* * *

Back on Ember Island, Toph stood in front of Aang, her hands on her hips as Aang ran through the appropriate drills she had given to him. 

“Stop thinking like an airbender, Twinkle Toes!” she yelled, listening to Aang’s grunts of effort.

Aang kicked the ground, a large boulder springing from the ground which he then kicked angrily, sending it towards Toph who sidestepped it easily. In response, Toph flicked a wrist, lifting the ground below Aang and throwing him off balance so that he fell backwards, landing on his back with a grunt. 

“Hey!” he exclaimed, sitting up and rubbing his lower back. “No fair!”

“You’re too distracted,” Toph told him, walking over and offering him her hand which he took. 

“Am not,” he denied as Toph pulled him up to his feet. Again, he rubbed at his lower back, wincing in pain. “I’m just tired, that’s all.”

“ _ No _ ,” Toph replied, shaking her head. “You’re still worried about Katara and Zuko, which means your head in the clouds instead of here on the ground.”

Aang was about to open his mouth to retort when Sokka appeared, his sword over his shoulder as he approached the Avatar and his earthbending teacher. 

“Hey, I don’t want to tell you guys how to train,” he stated, removing his sword from his shoulder and pointing it to the ground to lean on it, “but you need to keep it down. You’re lucky the estate is far enough away where no one can really see us, but I’m sure people will take note of the loud booms that come from over here.”

“Well, Twinkle Toes here is all distracted,” Toph exclaimed, crossing her arms in front of her. “So he’s not focusing on what he needs to do.” 

Aang threw his hands up in the air. “I’m  _ trying _ , Toph, but I have a lot on my mind! Not only are Katara and Zuko missing, but the comet is a month away and I’m barely ready!”

Sokka and Toph exchanged a glance, despite the fact that the latter could not exactly share the same look Sokka was giving her. 

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to  _ do _ !” Aang continued, feeling his anger flare up as he balled his fists and stared at Sokka and Toph. “You want us to wait and be patient, but for all we know Katara and Zuko could be dead somewhere, and you’re acting like you don’t care!”

“Aang, that’s my  _ sister _ you’re talking about!” Sokka exclaimed, his voice raising slightly. “Of course I’m worried, of course I haven’t thought of a million different scenarios where she’s probably dead in a ditch somewhere and I couldn’t even do anything to save her!”

Aang continued staring, but his eyes turned soft, his fists loosening slightly at Sokka’s words. 

“And I made Zuko  _ promise  _ me he would protect her!” Sokka continued, his voice cracking as he spoke. “He promised he would get her back to me as soon as he could, and they’re still not here! So, yes, Aang! I’m just as worried, but I don’t go around complaining about it, okay!” 

“Sokka, I - I’m sorry,” Aang muttered, eyes downcast so he did not have to look at Sokka who was rubbing the back of hand to his eyes. “I didn’t even think - she’s your sister, of course you’re worried about her.”

“No, you were too busy thinking of your own feelings,” Sokka spat, glaring at Aang.

“Hey, woah, that’s not fair,” Toph cut in, holding her arm out to keep Aang back from Sokka as he had taken a step closer, his fist raised. “Both of you aren’t thinking straight right now. You’re both worried about Katara and Zuko, but we need to  _ focus _ on what’s at stake. If, Spirits forbid, something did happen, do you think Katara and Zuko would want you guys fighting and worrying?”

Both Sokka and Aang grumbled a response. 

“No, they wouldn’t,” Toph stated firmly. “They would want you to focus on defeating the Fire Lord. I know both of them have faith in you, Aang, you need to have faith in them okay?”

Aang swallowed and nodded, taking a step back away from Toph and Sokka. 

“And  _ you _ ,” Toph commented, turning to face Sokka. “Katara doesn’t need anyone to protect her: not you and certainly not Zuko. Wherever she is, I’m sure she’s just as worried about you.”

“Yeah, I know,” Sokka sniffed, rubbing the back of his neck shamefully. He looked up at Aang, giving the younger boy an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, Aang, I know you’re under a lot of pressure, that wasn’t very cool of me to come at you like that.”

“I’m sorry, too,” Aang replied, returning Sokka’s smile. “You’re right, I need to be focusing all of my efforts on getting ready for the comet, not wallowing in pity. You’ve been trying to keep us all together, and I didn’t see it.”

“Great, now that that’s out of the way,” Toph said, quickly turning and striking her heel to the ground towards Aang, “think fast!”

Aang jumped just in time to avoid the rock that shot up from the ground, and pushed it back towards Toph with quick reflexes. 

Toph grinned. “Excellent. Now, run this again.”

“Ugh,” Aang groaned. “Yes, Toph.”

Sokka found a place far enough away to sit, watching Aang and Toph practice, leaning against his sword. Though he knew Katara didn’t need anyone’s protection, he secretly still hoped that Zuko kept his promise.

* * *

With the combination of Katara’s bending and leftover winds from the storm, Kimi, Zuko, and Katara arrived on Shuhon island within two days near nightfall. 

Once docked, Zuko helped Kimi unload his crates, placing them on the dock to be picked up later for trading. Katara stood by with their bags, watching the two men laugh amicably as they worked. 

“Kimi, thank you again,” Katara told him when they were done, earning her a small wave from Kimi. 

“How can we repay you?” Zuko asked him. “We don’t have any money, but -”

“Consider it a favor for Miho,” Kimi told them, grabbing a small bag from his pocket and throwing it into Zuko’s hands. Zuko raised his brow and opened the bag, eyes widening as he looked inside.

“We can’t accept this,” Zuko said, causing Katara to peek in the bag as well. Inside were silver and bronze coins. 

“Miho gave it to me the other day,” Kimi explained. “She told me that you would never accept the money from her, so that I was only to give it to you once we docked.”

“She - she didn’t have to do that,” Katara stated, looking up at Zuko who just gaped at Kimi. “Please, take it back to her.”

Kimi held his hands up. “No way, I’m not doing that. Accept the money she gave you, okay? Find an inn to stay in for the night, then get the next ferry out of here.”

“But -” Katara was about to retort, but Zuko just grabbed her wrist to silence her. 

“Okay,” Zuko cut in. “Thank you for your kindness. And, please, be sure to thank Miho for us too.”

“I will,” Kimi assured him. “I don’t know what you two did, but she cares about you kids.”

“Well, we care about her too,” Zuko told Kimi, bowing his head to the older man. “Thank you.”

“Take care,” Kimi told them. 

Zuko tugged at Katara’s arm, lifting one of the bags with his free hand. She followed him from the dock into town, much different than the one she and her friends were in the last time she was on Shuhon island. This town was smaller and didn’t have the giant statue of Ozai in the middle of it as an eyesore. 

“Okay, let’s find an inn and then tomorrow we head to Ember Island,” Zuko stated, weaving in and out of the crowd of people walking through town to get home as the sun made its descent. 

“How much further from here to Ember Island?” Katara asked, someone bumping her shoulder and giving her a nasty look. She rolled her eyes but kept walking. 

“Maybe just over a day?” Zuko answered.

As they walked, Katara kept her eyes open for an inn, but she spotted a group of messenger hawks flying towards a building. She watched as one flew into a small opening and disappeared within. 

“Wait, Lee,” she stated, tugging at him. “Look.”

Zuko turned to look where Katara was pointing. “Messenger hawks, so what?”

“So, maybe we can send a message to Sokka,” Katara explained, pulling Zuko towards the building. “Let him know we’re safe and that we’re coming.” 

“That’s actually a pretty good idea,” Zuko agreed, allowing Katara to drag him along. 

They approached the building, Zuko opening the door to allow Katara to go in first. He approached the counter, taking out the bag of money and looking around.

“Can I help you?” the worker asked, leaning on the counter and looking back and forth between Zuko and Katara. 

“How much to send a message to Ember Island?” Zuko asked, opening the bag. 

The worker gave him the amount and Zuko counted the money, placing it on the counter and sliding it towards the man. 

“Just write your message and pick your hawk,” the man explained, placing the money in the chest. “If you need parchment and a brush, we have extras over there.”

Zuko and Katara followed the man’s finger and went over the small desk where the extra parchment, brushes, and inkwells sat. With a flourish, Zuko placed a piece of parchment in front of him and dipped a brush in the ink, raising his eyebrow at Katara before starting.

“What do I even say?” he asked her, a small drop of ink dripping on the desk. 

“Whatever you can without giving away too much,” Katara answered, a hand on his back. 

Zuko focused back on the parchment, Katara reading over his shoulder as he wrote.

_ Sokka, _

_ Hope you and the others are doing well at the estate. It’s been a while. _

_ Unfortunately, we had a little trouble getting home from visiting your uncle and we got caught in a nasty storm. Not only that, but we were separated from our furry friend; we’re hoping he made it back to you. We found a place to stay until the storm died down, and now we should be on our way back to you and the others.  _

_ We are both safe and healthy, promises have been kept all around. No need to worry about us or write back. _

_ See you soon, _

_ Lee and Jun  _

“You’re using our fake names?” Katara asked quietly so no one could hear her. 

“Just in case it’s intercepted,” Zuko replied, blowing on the ink so it would dry faster. “Hopefully your brother can read between the lines.”

Katara sighed. “I’m sure he will. He and the other must be out of their minds worried about us.”

“No doubt about it,” Zuko agreed, now waving his hand over the parchment. “Hopefully this letter gets to them before we do so they’re expecting us.”

“That’s only if they’re on Ember Island like we hope,” Katara added, sighing deeply. 

“They will be,” Zuko said firmly, pressing a finger to one of the characters, noting how when he pulled his finger away, no ink was on his finger. Slowly, he rolled up the parchment and tied with some string. He turned towards the worker. “Hey, which is your fastest hawk?”

The man just pointed to a group of squawking hawks in the corner. 

“Thanks.” Zuko went over to one the hawks, placing the letter in the small container on its back. He held his arm out, and the hawk hopped onto his arm. Zuko led it to a small opening. “To the Fire Lord’s estate on Ember Island.”

With a flap of its wing, the hawk took off. 

“How do messenger hawks even  _ work _ ?” Katara asked, thinking of Hawky, Sokka’s messenger hawk that still had not returned from his journey to Gaoling. 

Zuko shrugged. “No idea. Azula tried to tell me once, but I wasn’t paying attention.” 

He grabbed her hand and pulled her outside, grabbing the bag he dropped on the ground as he passed the desk. Katara let him lead her outside, but she still looked up at the now dark sky, squinting at the stars as she tried to make out the hawk Zuko just sent hurtling in the air. 

“He’ll get it, don’t worry,” Zuko assured her, pulling her along when he spotted an inn close by. “For now, let’s recuperate.”

“Yes, okay,” Katara replied, gripping Zuko’s hand in hers. 

He looked down at her, giving her a reassuring smile, before finally opening the door to the inn. 

Again, Miho’s words rang through Katara’s head: someone who loves you as fiercely as he loves you. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to reunite Katara and Zuko with the others as quickly as possible now, so if they next couple of chapters feel rushed, that's why! 
> 
> I believe I'm going to take this fic as far as the Agni Kai and bit past it. With all of the growth between Zuko and Katara, I think that's going to be and important factor. Not only that, but since I decided to have Katara kill Yon Rha, I'm going to explore how different characters (particularly Sokka and Aang) react to her decision.


	13. make me feel alright again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I know I usually update every 2-3 days or so, but real life has caught up to me and I'm pretty busy this next week. I've had this chapter done for a while now, I just needed to read over it once more to check if it made sense/pacing and all that. Chapter 14 is already done, but I still need to review and all that. 
> 
> As for this chapter... I'm sorry for how it might turn out :)

“Well, here you go.” The innkeeper opened the door on the second floor, stepping aside to allow Zuko and Katara in. As they walked by, she held out the key for Katara to take, watching as they stepped over the threshold and looked around the miniscule room. Although Miho had given them plenty of money to afford a bigger room, both Zuko and Katara agreed to save their money just in case. 

“Thank you,” Zuko told the innkeeper, dropping his bag on the floor. “This is great.”

“Of course,” the innkeeper replied, taking a step away from the door and into the hallway. “A hot meal will be up in a few short moments, if you would like.”

“Yes, please,” Zuko answered, taking out another coin and handing it to the innkeeper, who nodded and walked away.

Zuko closed the door behind her as Katara made her way to the bed, placing her bag of clothes on top and rustling through to check that everything was still in order. Behind her, Zuko took off his cloak and unstrapped his broadswords, placing them both on the tiny dresser pressed up against the wall. 

“It’s not bad,” he told Katara, looking around the small room again. “It will do for a night before we head out tomorrow.”

“Agreed,” Katara replied, standing up straight and running a hand through her hand, ner nimble fingers pulling away at knots towards her ends. “Ugh, I think I’m going to wash up, get all the sea water off of me. I should be done before dinner.” 

“Have fun,” Zuko said as Katara made her way into the small washroom. She just rolled her eyes at him, sticking out her tongue in a way that caused Zuko to laugh. 

Once alone, Zuko sat on the bed, wringing his hands together as he waited for the food to arrive. He was nervous, but he wasn’t exactly sure why. Maybe since they were so close to finally finding everyone else, Zuko was just on high alert, waiting for another stroke of bad luck to hit him and Katara where they stood. 

Speaking of him and Katara… their relationship had taken a step forward, but Zuko wasn’t exactly sure which step that was. She trusted him, wholeheartedly too it seemed. She joked that maybe all it took was shared trauma and a near death experience to bring them together, but Zuko had a feeling it was more than that. There was always a connection between them, wasn’t there? Zuko just wasn’t sure when that connection had started. 

Now he was sitting here, trying to push away what Miho had said the other day, trying to focus on getting back to his friends. 

That, and helping Aang take down his father. 

A knock came at the door and Zuko got up, opening the door to a younger girl with two plates of food in her hand. He moved aside, letting the girl come inside and place the plates on the tiny table before bowing before him and leaving the room without saying another word. 

Taking a seat at the table, Zuko decided to wait for Katara to finish up in the washroom before eating. While he waited, he rapped his knuckles on the table impatiently, still deep in thought. Being so deep in thought, he missed the washroom door opening and Katara sauntering out, her long hair done up in a braid out of her face.

“Hey,” she said, sitting down across from Zuko and waving a hand in front of his face to get his attention. “You alright in there?”

Zuko blinked. “Huh? Oh, yeah, just thinking, that’s all.”

“You’ve seemed to be doing a lot of that lately,” Katara commented, picking up her chopsticks and poking around her plate of dinner. 

“So have you,” Zuko pointed out, also picking up chopsticks. “Seems like we’ve both had a lot on our minds the past few days.”

“Considering what we’ve been through this week,” Katara said simply with a small shrug of her shoulder, focusing on her plate of food. 

Zuko watched as she pushed aside some komodo chicken and began picking at the rice and vegetables. Sighing, he began eating his own dinner, realizing that he didn’t remember the last time he had been this hungry. Though Miho fed them every day, neither Zuko nor Katara ate much of the food she made for them, both too stubborn, or upset, or too deep in thought to actually eat. But now, sitting here in the inn, Zuko decided that he needed to eat to prepare for the next day or so ahead. 

Across from him, Katara continued to pick at her food, barely eating anything in front of her. Her nose was scrunched up like it usually was when she was deep in thought, her brows furrowed in concentration. 

“Katara?” Zuko called, but Katara still didn’t look up. “Hey, Katara. Are you okay?”

“Huh, what?” Katara asked, finally looking up at Zuko. “Sorry, I was just -”

“Thinking,” Zuko finished, placing his chopsticks down and leaning his chin on his hands. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Katara bit her lip, and Zuko could see tears forming in her eyes as she looked away from him and down at her food.

“Hey, Katara.” Zuko got up from his spot and walked over to Katara, kneeling next to her chair; he had to tilt his head up only a little so that he could look up at her. He placed a hand on her upper arm so that she would look at him.

“What is everyone going to say?” she asked, dropping her chopsticks on the table. 

“What are they going to say about what, Katara?” he asked her, though he knew what she was going to ask. She had asked him this night ago while they laid in the dark cave, the rain pounding on the ground outside. 

“When they - when they find out I killed him?” Katara sniffed, wiping her tears from her cheek. “Are they going to be mad? Disappointed? Are they going to look at me differently?”

“Do  _ you  _ see yourself differently?” Zuko asked her. 

“ _ Yes _ ,” Katara sobbed. “Yes, I do.”

“Okay, that’s normal,” Zuko assured her. “But how do you see yourself? That’s the important question.”

“I - I’m not sure,” Katara answered, hiccupping slightly. “I don’t hate myself.”

“That’s a pretty good start,” Zuko replied as Katara turned her body so that she was facing him completely. 

“At first, I think I saw myself as a killer,” Katara explained, wiping her face again. “And, I mean, I guess I still sort of do. But I don’t regret what I did. I don’t regret ending the life of a monster.”

“Okay,” Zuko repeated. “That’s good.”

“I think - I think I still need to come to terms with what I did,” Katara finished. “But at the end of the day, I did what I thought was best.”

Zuko nodded. “Yes, you did.”

“You don’t hate me, do you?” Katara asked, causing Zuko to raise his brow at her in confusion. “I mean, you don’t hate me for what I did?”

“No, Katara, I don’t,” he answered. “Remember what I told you: I’ve killed people before too. But not everyone is going to agree with your actions.” 

“I know,” Katara replied, tears forming in her eyes again. “That’s what I’m scared of. What if - what if I tell everyone what I did and they won’t look at me anymore. Or they assume I would kill again?”

“Would you?” Zuko asked before he could stop himself. 

Katara winced. “If Hiratao had gotten any further than he did, I would have.”

Zuko let out a breath. “Okay.”

“I just - I don’t -” But Katara stopped, letting out a sob. 

Before he realized what was happening, Katara threw herself at him, her arms wrapped around him as she buried her face in the crook of his neck. Wrapping his arms around her underarms, Zuko stood up, bringing her with him so that she was standing on her tiptoes as she cried into him.

“You’ve done so much, Katara,” he told her softly, listening as she sobbed. “I’m sorry I can’t make it better for you, but it will get better, I promise.”

She sniffed, but nodded against him, still crying. Zuko just held her, hugging her tightly against him, unwilling to let go. He felt like he was holding her broken pieces in his hands, waiting until she was ready to put herself back together. 

Slowly, Katara began to calm down, her grip loosening around Zuko as she moved away from him, lowering herself from her tiptoes. Her hands sat on Zuko’s shoulders, his slid down to her waist as she looked up at him with glassy eyes, red from crying. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, lifting one hand to her face and wiping away a tear with his thumb. 

“Yes,” Katara replied, her breathing steady, her eyes not moving from his.

“Okay.”

Still, she stared up at him, biting her lip as he kept his palm pressed to her cheek. He leaned forward just as Katara raised herself back on her tiptoes, pressing her lips against his. Surprised, he kissed her back, feeling her arms snake around his neck, burying her hands in his hair. She deepened the kiss as his hand made its way to the back of her head, pushing her into him, his opposite hand gripping her waist. He felt her hands slide from the back of his head towards his chest.

_ Bad idea,  _ he thought suddenly,  _ very bad idea. _

Before he could stop himself, Zuko grabbed her wrists with both hands and pulled away from her, leaving her breathing heavily as she stared at him.

“I don’t think - maybe this isn’t a good idea,” he told her, her wrists still gripped firmly in his hands as she blinked up at him.

“Okay,” she replied, not tugging her hands away or taking a step back from him. 

“You’re upset, it wouldn’t be fair,” he continued, finally releasing her and taking a step back, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. 

Katara shook her head. “No, you’re right, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Zuko replied, as she sat back down on her seat, fiddling with the end of her braid. “Uh, I’m going to go wash up, I think.”

“Sure, I can clean up the food,” Katara agreed, not looking at Zuko and still focusing on her hair. 

Clearing his throat, Zuko stalked off to the washroom, closing the door behind him. He leaned up against it, burying his face in his hands as he did. He felt so  _ stupid _ , mostly because he didn’t exactly know how to react to what just happened. 

Did she kiss him because she had a moment of weakness? Did she kiss because she felt something for him? He wasn’t even sure of his own feelings toward the waterbender currently cleaning up the food outside the washroom door. If his relationship with Katara was precarious before, surely it reached a new level of fragility he didn’t even want to think about.

Groaning, Zuko pushed himself off the door to wash himself off as quickly as possible. Glancing in the mirror, he spotted his scarred face staring back at him, gloating. He turned away in a huff, unable to look at his reflection any longer.

When he was done, he opened the door slowly, poking his head out to look for Katara before heading out completely. She was sitting on the bed, her knees pulled into her chest, her chin resting on her knees. Taking a breath, Zuko walked over, sitting on the edge of the bed next to her and placing a hand on her head.

“Hey,” he said tentatively, Katara’s eyes moving to look at him.

“Hi,” she replied quietly, a light flush making its way on her cheeks. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Zuko asked, raising his eyebrow at her in question. 

Katara sighed. “Should we?”

“Only if you want to,” Zuko told her carefully, removing his hand from her head. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking,” Katara stated, raising her head from her knees with a small sniff. “I just - I just  _ did it _ , and I didn’t mean to put you in that position, so -”

“Katara, it’s okay,” Zuko cut in, giving her a reassuring smile. “It was a - a heat of the moment thing, right? There’s a lot of tension, a lot of big feelings… so yeah.”

“Yes,” Katara agreed slowly, considering Zuko. “Yeah, it was the heat of the moment. It wasn’t like it  _ meant  _ anything, right?”

“Did you want it to mean anything?” Zuko asked before he could stop himself, Katara’s chin going to her knees once more as she hugged herself tighter. 

Squeezing her eyes shut, Katara said, “No.”

“Okay, great,” Zuko replied, clapping his hands together and standing up. “So it didn’t mean anything, that’s fine. We were both just deep in thought, and it happened, and now we can move on.”

Katara opened her eyes and watched as he walked around the bed towards his side, not saying anything as he slid under the sheets next to her. She remained folded into herself, considering him thoughtfully. 

“Katara, really, it’s okay,” he assured her, turning on his side to look at her fully. “I’m not upset, I’m not angry at you.”

Katara finally unfurled herself and slid underneath the sheets herself, resting on her side to look at Zuko, using her elbow to prop herself up. 

“Did  _ you  _ want it to mean something?” she asked him, eyes narrowed. 

“Katara…,” he sighed, wiping a piece of hair away from his eyes. 

“Did you?” she repeated, still staring down at him, her hand gripping the sheets as if keeping her tied to reality.

“What’s the difference if I did or didn’t?” he asked her. 

“Because I want to know what you’re thinking,” Katara prodded, finally sliding down fully and resting her head on her pillow. “I know you care about me and how I’m feeling, but have you ever thought that maybe I care about you and how you’re feeling?”

Zuko blinked. “No, I guess I haven't.”

“So?” Katara asked again. “Did you want it to mean something to you?”

Zuko closed his eyes, memories of the catacombs flashing before him. Katara’s hand on his scar, the way she looked at him, so much hurt and betrayal in her eyes, when he shot his fire at Aang. The way she glared at him across the fire at the Western Air Temple, the way his heart  _ pounded  _ every time she looked at him because he wanted her approval so badly. The way she slowly learned to trust him again, the way he opened himself up to her because he felt so free with her.

“No,” he lied, finally opening his eyes to look at her. “No, it didn’t mean anything. Like I said, it was just the heat of the moment.” 

Katara sighed and nodded. “Okay. Then it’s settled. Do you think we can just… forget it happened?”

“Is that what you want?” Zuko asked, reaching out and finding her hand. “Because we can say it didn’t mean anything, but I’m going to be honest and say I don’t want to forget it happened.” 

“Me either,” she admitted, lacing her fingers through his. 

“Are we still a team?” he asked her.

She gave him a smile, a real smile, one that assured him that everything was back to normal between them. “Yes, we’re still a team. You’re not getting rid of me that easily, remember?”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he replied, laughing. He felt his heart no longer pounding in his chest, felt his shoulders relax as Katara laughed along with him.

Yes, everything was normal between them. As normal as Zuko and Katara could be.

Except Miho was right: Zuko didn’t know how much he loved her until this moment. 

* * *

Sokka walked into the kitchen early the next morning, stretching his arms above his head, moving his head from side to side to loosen the muscles in his neck. He left Suki sleeping in bed upstairs, her soft snores the last sound he heard when he left the room. When he glanced out the window to the courtyard, he spotted Aang sitting cross legged by himself in the middle, deep in meditation. For a moment, Sokka debated calling out to the young Avatar, but he decided against it, instead turning towards the basket of fruit in the middle of the table.

The Fire Lord’s estate on Ember Island had been the perfect hiding spot so far. No one bothered them and Sokka and Suki were able to do some shopping in town whenever they needed. Not only that, but with the private beach, Aang was able to practice his waterbending without being spotted. With the large amount of space, hiding Appa was even practical. 

Just as Sokka was about to take a bite of an apple, Momo came flying in the kitchen from the open window chattering excitedly. He landed on Sokka’s shoulder, hitting Sokka’s cheek with his paws.

“Hey, buddy, what are you doing?” Sokka asked him, giving Momo a small belly rub with his finger. “Are you okay?”

Momo continued chittering, but hopped off of Sokka’s shoulder flying towards the door. He paused mid flight to look back at Sokka, still chattering.

“Okay, okay, I’m coming,” Sokka replied, exasperated. 

As he followed the flying lemur out the door towards the courtyard, he took a bite of his apple, wondering what on earth got Momo so worked up. Looking up, he watched Momo fly in circles drawing Sokka’s attention to whatever it was that Momo wanted him to pay attention to. Squinting, Sokka placed a hand to his forehead, spotting something slowly making its way towards the estate. 

“Momo, what is that?” Sokka asked as Momo landed on his shoulder once more, finally silent. 

As the small dot in the sky got closer, Sokka was finally able to make out what it was: a hawk flying straight towards him.

“Hawky?” Sokka asked, taken aback as the hawk fled towards him with speed. 

Once it finally approached, Sokka noticed that it wasn’t his cherished Hawky, but a different messenger hawk that he didn’t recognize. Sokka held his arm out, allowing the hawk to land on him. 

“What is it, Sokka?” Aang walked up from behind him, tilting his head towards the hawk on Sokka’s arm. Momo hopped off Sokka’s shoulder and onto Aang’s head, wrapping his tail around Aang like he usually did. 

“I’m not sure,” Sokka answered, opening the container on the hawk’s back and taking out the letter inside. As soon as Sokka took out the letter, the hawk jumped into the air and flew away. 

“Well, if we want to reply back, looks like we need to find another way to respond,” Aang joked, grinning at Sokka who was focused on opening the letter.

“I don’t get it, no one knows we’re here,” Sokka said, mostly to himself when he finally un-tied the string holding the letter closed. 

Quickly, Sokka unrolled the parchment, feeling his eyes widen when he began reading. When he spotted the names at the bottom, he swallowed, looking up at Aang.

“Sokka?” Aang asked, his voice going high like it usually did when he was nervous. “Sokka, is everything okay?”

“It’s them, Aang,” Sokka told him, holding the letter out to Aang to take. “It’s  _ them. _ ”

Aang grabbed the letter out of Sokka’s hand, eyes scanning the page quickly. When he was done, he looked up at Sokka, a wide grin on his face.

“They’re okay,” Sokka choked out, feeling his legs weaken beneath him. “They’re okay. She’s okay.”

“You were right, Sokka!” Aang exclaimed, grabbing Sokka’s shoulder. “You were right! They’re on their way here!”

“Hey, what’s all the commotion out here?” Aang and Sokka both turned to spot Toph and Suki coming out of the house, Toph’s arms crossed in front of her. “You woke me up!”

Aang handed the letter to Suki when she was close enough. Like Sokka and Aang before her, she scanned the letter, looking up at them in surprise.

“Well, there’s definitely a piece of paper being passed around,” Toph pouted. “So either tell me what’s wrong or I walk.”

“It’s Katara and Zuko,” Sokka explained, taking the letter back from Suki. “We just got a letter from them. They’re okay, they’re coming this way now.”

“See!” Toph claimed, throwing her hands in the air. “I told you they’d be okay! Do you know when they’ll be here?”

“Maybe the next day or two?” Sokka replied, studying the letter again. “I’m not sure, but we need to be on the lookout.”

“We’ll finally be a team again,” Aang said thoughtfully, looking out towards the sky.

Sokka placed a hand on his shoulder. “Yeah, buddy, we will be.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes we have a dramatic kiss but they are IDIOTS in love, and they're not sure how to deal with this big feelings just yet! 
> 
> plus, not only that, but from my point of view, I feel like Zuko would have felt like continuing forward with kissing Katara/anything that might come after would have been like taking advantage of her with her current state of mind. I debated with going further, but then I'd be walking the line of dubious consent, and I wasn't really feeling that. so, I have Zuko shutting this down because he was aware of Katara's emotional distress, plus we have the experience with Hiratao on top of that, and he didn't want to hurt her anymore than she already was. I just felt like it wasn't fair to either of them. will the kiss be addressed again? of course! will Miho's words to both Katara AND Zuko come up again? absolutely! will these idiots continue pining? obviously! I know I didn't need to explain why I made the decision I did, but I felt like it was nice to have :)
> 
> of course, all feedback is welcome! and thank you everyone for the kind words/kudos you leave. they bring me so much joy when I open my inbox!


	14. hollow point smile

Katara thought that the ferry ride to Ember Island would have taken a lot longer than she expected it to be. 

“You have a bunch of rich people on their way to vacation,” Zuko explained, shrugging slightly. “The more money you pay, the faster the ferry gets you there.”

“So, when  _ are  _ we going to get there?” Katara asked him. They were standing by the edge of the ferry, leaning up against the banister and watching the waves below. 

“Tomorrow morning at the earliest,” Zuko answered, pulling his hood further over his face. Though Katara stood on his left to hide him, Zuko was still paranoid about someone seeing his scar and putting together who he was. 

They were lucky that they didn’t have any trouble getting onto the ferry, the ferryman taking their money and handing them tickets without even a second thought. As soon as they were on board, they found somewhere inconspicuous and out of the way to stand. Once it was time to head below deck for the night, they hadn’t thought that far ahead. 

“I could bend the water again,” Katara offered playfully, elbowing Zuko in the ribs, causing him to smirk below his hood. “What do you think?”

“While it would be nice to get to Ember Island quickly,” Zuko stated, turning his body so that he could look at her fully, “I do think you need to save your energy and stay hidden.”

“What about you?” Katara asked him, raising her chin in slight defiance. “If anyone is going to get caught, it’s you.”

“I know.” Zuko sighed. “Better me than you though.”

“Why’s that?” Katara challenged, taking a step closer to Zuko so that she was in his space. 

“I just don’t want anything happening to you, that’s all,” Zuko explained, placing his hands on her shoulders and placing a small kiss to her forehead. At first Katara was confused by the gesture before she heard the giggles of a few younger girls walking by them, all staring at Zuko in appreciation. 

“Hmm, remember, I can kick your ass,” Katara reminded him, slowly wrapping an arm around him to pull him closer to her. “So if I was captured, I can fight back.” 

“Yes, I know, I know,” Zuko replied with a small chuckle. “I just can’t help but worry sometimes.”

When they woke up this morning, their legs tangled together, Katara’s head nestled under Zuko’s chin, neither had made any mention of what happened the night before. As promised, while they acknowledged that something happened, though neither were exactly sure what, they decided not let it impede their developing friendship. 

Still, while Katara told Zuko that the kiss meant nothing to her, she couldn’t help but hear that small voice in her head telling her that she was lying. But what her actions meant, Katara wasn't sure. 

Katara assumed that once she and Zuko returned from this journey together, maybe her feelings toward him would change. She was right, of course, she learned to trust him fully, saw a level of kindness that she had never seen in him before. No longer was he the boy who had betrayed her in Ba Sing Se, but the man who would stand by her through anything. There were times she used to flinch when he tried to speak to her or offer her his hand, but now Katara felt a new level of comfort when Zuko placed a hand on her arm, her hand, her head, anywhere on her body. The gestures between them felt anything but simple, but charged with an extra energy that sent shivers down Katara’s spine.

Zuko wasn’t just her teammate, but her friend. Someone who understood her wholeheartedly, who saw the worst parts of her and didn’t judge her. He let her be angry and messy and dirty and ugly, and whatever other emotion she was feeling. 

“I don’t want you to worry about me,” she told him quietly, though Zuko was no longer looking at her, but watching the clouds drift by above him.

“Well, whether you want me to or not, I’m going to keep worrying about you,” Zuko said simply, giving her a squeeze. “So stay by me until we make it to Ember Island, okay?”

“Okay.” 

Though the rest of the ferry ride to Ember Island was uneventful as Katara and Zuko stayed in their position until nightfall when it was time to head below deck. Even then, both of them stayed awake, sitting back to back as they watched their fellow passengers sleep around them. Small children laid curled up into their mothers’ sides, lovers had their hands intertwined, but Zuko and Katara made no other motions towards each other. 

Perhaps it was karma telling them that they had enough adventure the past week, enough trouble, because they made it to Ember Island early the next morning unscathed, all of their belongings still in hand, and their identities still kept to themselves. 

Together, they made their way off the ferry, Katara’s free arm looped through Zuko’s as they headed into town. 

“The estate is just there,” Zuko told her, motioning with his chin towards the northern part of the island. “If we just head there without any stops, we’ll be there soon.” 

“Do you think Sokka got our letter?” Katara asked, ducking around a group of teens who were excitedly running through town square. Zuko pulled her closer to him, eyes scanning the crowd as he watched for potential dangers.

“I’m not sure, to be honest,” Zuko admitted, focusing back on Katara. “But there doesn’t seem to be many soldiers here on the island, so we don’t have to worry about them again.”

“Good,” Katara replied, remembering the way Hiratao’s hand burned her wrist, the way she hissed in pain as he laughed at her. She forced herself to squash down the feeling as Zuko led her along.

But as they walked, Katara looked down at her wrist; she had taken the bandage off at the inn, but the skin was discolored only a bit. It was no longer red and bubbly, but a faint pink. Unfortunately, Yon Rha’s death and the scar on her arm were to be memories she would take from her search for vengeance. 

Next to her, Zuko was silent, pausing every so often to let a group of people walk by them or to scan the area just in case. With his hood still up, no one paid any attention to either of them slowly making their way through the crowd. 

They made it through town, leaving behind the brightly lit square and boisterous people on vacation. Zuko led Katara towards a worn out path on the side, hidden among the rest as it was overgrown with various weeds.

“We haven’t been here in years,” Zuko explained, helping Katara over a palm tree that had fallen on the path. “Since my family was actually happy.”

“Zuko, that’s horribly depressing,” Katara commented. 

Zuko shrugged. “Maybe, but I’m pretty desensitized to it by now.” 

Katara didn’t say anything, just shook her head as they continued down the path, the estate finally coming into view. It was bigger than Katara imagined, and from where they were in town only moments ago, it was perfectly placed away from peering eyes. 

Just as she was about to ask Zuko if he  _ really  _ thought the others were able to find their estate, Katara heard someone call her name out. 

“Katara!” 

Katara paused, dropping the bag in her hands and pulling away from Zuko, standing in the middle of the path as Sokka ran into view.

“Katara!” 

Before she could even think, Katara began running as fast as her legs could take her towards her brother. Even from where she was, she could see the relief in Sokka’s face as he ran to her, arms open in front of him. Katara got to Sokka first, throwing herself into his arms, feeling him wrap his arms around her tightly.

“You’re here, you’re okay, you’re here,” he repeated, burying his face in her neck, his voice thick with emotion.

“I’m here, I’m okay,” Katara assured him, squeezing her eyes shut as she cried into her brother. How she  _ missed  _ him.

Sokka pulled away from her, his hands resting on her shoulders as he studied her. “I was so worried, when Appa came back without you, we didn’t know what had happened, and I know we should have gone after you but -”

Katara shook her head, grinning at Sokka’s rambling. “You couldn’t risk coming after us and getting caught.”

“I just didn’t want to lose you too,” Sokka said, hugging Katara to him again. 

Zuko approached from behind, both bags in his hands since Katara had dropped hers. When Sokka saw him, he pulled away from Katara, making his way over to Zuko and placing a hand on the older boy’s shoulder.

“Are  _ you  _ okay?” Sokka asked Zuko, taking a bag with the hand not holding on to Zuko.

“As okay as I’ll ever be,” Zuko replied. “I’m just glad you guys found this place.”

“Well, after you told me this is where you planned to take us next, I figured this is where you would try to come,” Sokka answered, dropping his hand from Zuko’s shoulder. “Come on, everyone else is inside, they’ll want to see you.”

Though to be fair, they didn’t get very far, just in view of the front door when Aang, Toph, and Suki barreled out, all heading towards Katara and Zuko.

Aang threw himself on Katara, almost knocking the wind out of Katara’s lungs. Still, she missed him, and she hugged him tightly.

“I was so worried!” he muttered as he squeezed her so hard she thought she might stop breathing.

“Aang, Aang, I’m okay,” she assured him, prying herself away from him, giving him a reassuring smile. “See, I’m perfectly okay. Promise.”

Aang grinned back, shoulders loosening as he did. “I’m just so happy you’re here.”

“Me too,” Katara replied, taking Aang’s hand in hers and giving it an affectionate squeeze.

Behind them, Toph and Suki were both talking to Zuko, though he looked exhausted. Katara barely registered the dark circles under his eyes this morning. 

“Hey, why don’t I show you where you’re staying,” Sokka offered Zuko, clapping Zuko on the back. 

“Please,” Zuko replied, handing Katara her bag. “In case you want to change.”

“Thanks,” Katara replied, suddenly embarrassed as Zuko’s hand brushed hers. 

He gave her a tired smile before following Sokka into the house, talking about who was maybe staying in whose room. 

“You going okay, Sugar Queen?” Toph asked, approaching Katara with a worried look. “You sound… tired.”

“Toph!” Aang stated, giving Toph a small shove. 

“No, no, she’s right,” Katara said, gripping the bag in her hand. “Zuko and I didn’t sleep on the ferry ride here.”

“Here, let me take you to your room,” Suki told her, taking Katara’s hand in hers and tugging her along. She looked at Toph and Aang. “Don’t you two need to train?”

“Yep! Let’s go Twinkle Toes!” Toph demanded, pushing Aang away towards where they usually practiced. 

“Aw, but -” Aang started, looking over at Katara.

“No, Katara needs rest,” Suki said firmly, pulling Katara once more leaving Toph and Aang behind. 

“Thanks, Suki,” Katara murmured as they entered the house. 

Katara was expecting it to be big, but she was not expecting it to be this dilapidated. Cobwebs decorated the corners of the large lobby, a nice layer of dust crunched beneath her feet. She looked at Suki, raising her eyebrows in question.

“To be fair,” Suki shrugged, “we’ve been focused on training and planning for the comet and worrying about you and Zuko. Cleaning this place was  _ not  _ a priority.”

“That’s fair,” Katara agreed, following Suki up a wide staircase to the second floor. 

“So, Sokka and I think we might be Zuko’s mother’s room,” Suki explained, waving a hand towards the first door they passed. “Toph we’re pretty sure is in Azula’s room; Aang we think might be in a guest room? We’re actually not sure. We left Zuko’s room for him.”

“You put a lot of thought into it,” Katara stated as Suki stopped in front of the last door of the hall. “Thanks, Suki.”

“Hey, what are friends for,” Suki replied, giving Katara’s hand a squeeze. 

Suki opened the bedroom door and ushered Katara inside, closing the door behind them once they were finally in. Katara immediately went towards the large bed, sinking herself into it. 

“Do you want me to leave?” Suki asked, but she sat on the bed nevertheless, watching as Katara stretched her arms up. 

“No, you can stay,” Katara replied, sitting up next to Suki. 

“So, what happened?” Suki asked. “Unless, you know, you don’t want to talk about it.”

Katara sighed. “We were caught in a storm. On our way back, we were thrown off of Appa and ended up washed up on one of the southern islands, Gangjin.”

“Is that where you were the whole time?” Suki tilted her head to the side, eyes wide as she concentrated on Katara.

“Yes, we stayed with an older woman in one of the villages by the dock,” Katara explained, feeling herself smiling fondly as she thought of Miho. “Her name was Miho, and she practically took us in.”

“What did you guys do?” Suki asked. “How did you get away?”

“It was pretty much the same thing everyday,” Katara stated. “I mean, there were Fire Nation soldiers occupying the village, but…”

“But?” 

Katara didn’t answer. She didn’t want to tell Suki what had happened, what the soldiers tried to do to her, how Zuko said - 

“Well, it really opened our eyes to what happens in the smaller parts of the Fire Nation,” Katara said inside. “Despite the village being Fire Nation citizens they were still treated horribly by the people who were there to protect them.”

“Sokka told me about some of the atrocities you’ve come across,” Suki said, sighing deeply. Then she smiled, giving Katara a small shove. “But you had to spend the whole week with Zuko.”

“Yes,” Katara replied slowly, fiddling with her hands. 

Suki raised her eyebrows. “Did something happen?”

“It’s more complicated than that I think,” Katara replied, shaking her head. “But we’re fine now. Zuko and I, I mean. We’re good.”

“Okay, great,” Suki replied, getting up off the bed. “Listen, why don’t you rest a bit, okay? Then, if you don’t mind, go talk to your brother. He’s been worried sick.”

“Thanks, Suki,” Katara replied. “I really appreciate it.”

Suki gave Katara one last smile before leaving the room, closing the door softly behind her as she did. Katara laid back on the bed, fully expecting to lay wide awake as different memories and scenarios played through her mind. Instead, she fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. 

* * *

Katara woke up an hour later to the sun shining in her eyes. Groaning, she sat up, placing her hand to her eyes for shade. 

For a moment, she thought she was still at Miho’s, and the emptiness of the spot next to her in bed almost caused her to panic, before she remembered where she was: she was on Ember Island. She was with her brother and everyone else. 

She was finally safe. 

Choking on a sob, Katara laid back down, curling up into a ball as she remembered everything that had happened the last week. By herself, Katara cried freely, allowing the tears to soak the soft pillow beneath her cheek. Each breath was a heaving sob, one that she had been holding in since Yon Rha’s body fell into the mud. Of course, she’s cried this week, but right now was a cry for herself. With no one to hold her or whisper words of assurance, Katara allowed herself to be completely vulnerable. 

She cried for her mother, she cried for Sokka, she cried for her father.

Not only that, but she cried for Aang, for leaving him behind while she took this selfish journey of self-discovery. She cried, because she didn’t  _ feel  _ selfish.

She cried for Miho, the kind woman who took her in even though she had experienced the horrors of war for so many years.

She cried for Zuko, for the way she had treated him for so long before finally realizing that she cared about him so deeply it  _ hurt.  _

Finally, she cried for herself. Katara cried for the childhood lost, the way she had to mature before she was ready to be an adult. She cried for the hurt she never let herself feel, the hurt she buried deep in her heart for no one to find. 

This was a cathartic type of cry, one that allowed Katara to finally open herself up. 

Of course, she knew she would have to face her friends again sooner or later, and would have to tell them what happened when she was away.

But for a moment, she let herself cry. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're all finally reunited! Yay! Again, sorry if it felt too rushed, I just really wanted to get the group together again. I'm excited for the next chapter since Katara finally has to tell everyone else what happened.
> 
> I'm hoping to explore Zuko and Katara's feeling towards each other a bit more, especially Zuko's since he's the one practically denying how he feels. Or, he knows how he feels, but he's nervous about Katara. I dunno, either way, the relationship obviously will be explored more. I'm just not sure when the next chapter will be up, so hold on to your hats.
> 
> Also, just going to plug my Korrasami fic "run dry" in here as well. When I needed to step away from this fic, I wrote that one instead. :)


	15. eyes and words so icy

When Katara finally made it out of her room, dressed in her Water Tribe clothes, she immediately went to look for Sokka, craving his presence after a moment of catharsis. 

Before she told anyone else, Katara knew she had to tell her brother about what she did, the actions she had decided to take. Though she feared her brother’s reaction, Katara knew she could not keep this part of herself hidden from him for so long. Sokka was her brother, hopefully he would understand what happened. 

She found him in the courtyard standing with Zuko, deep in conversation. For a moment, Katara thought Zuko broke his promise and told Sokka about what happened, but when they heard her approach, they both looked up at her, Sokka giving her a wide smile and a wave. Zuko, on the other hand, looked at her sadly, his eyes full of longing. 

“Hey, you’re awake!” Sokka said as Katara went over and stood next to him. “I went to check on you about half an hour ago, and you were out cold. How are you feeling?”

“Better, I guess,” Katara replied, wrapping her arms around herself. She exchanged a look with Zuko, who just nodded, motioning with his eyes towards Sokka. 

“Uh, what’s happening here?” Sokka asked, glancing back and forth between Katara and Zuko. “Let me guess, after a week alone together, you developed a way to talk in each other's minds?”

Zuko shook his head as Sokka wiggled his fingers towards him, making ‘ooo’ sounds with his mouth as he did.

“Cut it out, Sokka,” Zuko said, swatting Sokka’s hands away, but not in a way that was annoyed. “But, yes, your sister and I developed this deep connection where all we have to do is look in each other’s eyes and immediately know what the other is feeling.” 

Sokka blinked. “Really?”

“No.” Zuko deadpanned, rolling his eyes and patting Sokka on the arm. “Let your sister explain, okay?”

“Uh, okay?” Sokka replied, now looking down at Katara with a raised eyebrow. 

“Actually, I did want to talk to you,” Katara told her brother, grabbing Sokka’s arm. “Can we go somewhere private to talk?”

“Yeah, sure,” Sokka replied, pointing towards the beach. 

As they walked away, Katara glanced back at Zuko.

_ Tell him _ , Zuko mouthed. 

Katara nodded and fell into step beside Sokka, following as he brought her along the path to the private beach on the estate. Sokka kept shooting her worried looks, but Katara didn’t say anything. She felt her heart pounding in her chest, threatening to push through her ribs.

Once on the beach, Sokka led Katara towards the water, settling down in the sand, crossing his legs as he sat. Katara mirrored his position, sitting next to her brother.

Before saying anything, Katara ran her hands through the sand, feeling how soft it felt against her skin. She had never seen so much sand before, especially after growing up surrounded by ice and snow. Curious, she scooped some sand up in her hand before tilting her hand to the side, watching as the sand spilled down. Sokka watched her with an amused look on his face.

“You know, I think I like sand,” Katara commented, digging her fingers into the sand, trying to see how far she could dig.

“It’s okay,” Sokka replied, “but it’s kind of irritating. Plus, it gets everywhere. And I mean  _ everywhere _ .” 

“Gross, Sokka,” Katara replied, bumping her shoulder against Sokka’s.

Sokka shrugged. “You brought it up.”

Katara sighed dreamily and looked back at the ocean, watching as the tides crashed against the shore. She loved the sound of the ocean, loved that way it calmed her when she was angry or upset.

“I found him,” Katara told Sokka, not looking away from the water. “The man who killed her. I found him.”

She heard Sokka take a sharp intake of breath.

“His name was Yon Rha,” Katara continued, taking a deep breath. “He was the general of the Southern Raiders. He recently retired and we found him living on an island in the southern part of the archipelago.”

“Okay.” Sokka’s voice was quiet, but Katara could still hear him over the waves.

“I killed him, Sokka.” Katara’s voice felt strangely distant as she said those words. “I killed him and I wouldn’t take it back.”

“Okay,” Sokka repeated, moving closer to Katara and placing an arm around her shoulders. 

“He was a monster and he took her away from us,” Katara continued, eyes still on the ocean, trying to match her breathing to the tides. 

“I understand, Katara,” Sokka assured her. 

“Do you?” Katara asked, finally looking at Sokka. “The Southern Raiders came to kill the last waterbender. Sokka, she died to protect  _ me _ . Did you know that?”

Sokka shook his head. “No, I - I didn’t know that. Dad never found out why they were there, that secret died with her, I guess.”

“He killed her because of  _ me _ ,” Katara emphasized as Sokka held her tight. “I took his life, I killed him.”

“Is it what you wanted to do?” Sokka asked her. “Did you go there planning to kill him?”

“Not originally,” Katara answered, shaking her head. “I just wanted to see him, see the man who took her away from us. But when we found him, he told me what happened… I  _ wanted  _ to kill him. I let him beg for mercy before I buried an ice dagger deep in his heart.”

Sokka let out a deep sigh, closing his eyes as he did.

“You hate me,” Katara stated, finally looking over at her brother. “You’re upset that I killed him.”

“No, Katara, I’m not upset,” Sokka replied, causing Katara to blink up at him in surprise. He opened his eyes to look at her, noticing the bemusement in her eyes. “Why do you think I’d hate you?”

“I thought you agreed with Aang?” Katara asked, biting her lip. “I thought - I just assumed you wouldn’t want me to go through with it.”

“Katara, if I was in your position, I think I would have done the exact same thing,” Sokka stated firmly, hugging Katara close to him. “Well, maybe not with ice daggers, but I’m pretty handy with a sword.”

Katara snorted. “Really?”

“She was my mother too, Katara,” Sokka reminded her. “He took her away from both of us.”

“I guess I never realized…” Katara began, but the rest of her sentence died on her tongue. Never realized Sokka was as affected as her? Never realized that Sokka was also deeply traumatized by their mother’s death? “I’m sorry.”

“Why?” Sokka asked her. “There’s nothing for you to be sorry about.”

“I’m sorry for what I said before,” Katara clarified. “About you not loving mom the same way I did. That was cruel and unfair of me, and I’m sorry.”

“I forgive you,” Sokka replied. “I’m not mad at you, Katara. You were upset, you needed to be heard. I get it.”

“But it was unfair,” Katara insisted. “You did - still do - love mom! And I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Katara,” Sokka repeated, swatting her with his free hand. “Please. I accept your apology, okay?”

“Okay,” Katara replied, resting her head against Sokka’s shoulder. “But you’re not mad I killed him? You’re not mad that I’m - I’m a killer?”

“Katara, think about the amount of ideas or inventions I’ve come up with that have probably killed people,” Sokka explained, resting his head on Katara’s. “I may not have killed people directly, but I’m responsible for a lot of deaths.” 

“I guess that makes sense,” Katara considered, watching the tide ebb and flow in front of her. 

“But no,” Sokka continued, “I’m not mad at you. I could never be mad at you for feeling vengeful about this. I’m your brother, I’ve got your back.”

“Always?” Katara asked, feeling herself smile.

“Duh,” Sokka replied. “I know you can handle yourself, and that you’re one of the most powerful waterbenders in the world, but a guy can always have his little sister’s back, can’t he?”

“I would beat you if you didn’t,” Katara stated, all of the tension melting off of her. “Thanks, Sokka.”

“Of course, Katara,” Sokka replied. “Love you, Katara.”

“Yeah, love you too, Sokka.” Katara poked Sokka on the side, causing Sokka to swat her hand away playfully. 

Laughing, Katara poked him again, feeling more like herself than she did in ages. While she was happy that Sokka understood her reasoning for killing Yon Rha, she was still nervous about how everyone else, especially Aang, would react. For now, she focused on being here with her brother, happy to finally be together with him once more. 

“Hey, remember the story mom told us?” Katara asked, lifting her head up off Sokka’s shoulder to look over at him. “The one about the sun and the moon?”

“Yeah, she was in the middle of telling it to us before she - well, she never got to finish,” Sokka stated, shrugging nonchalantly in response. “Why do you ask?”

“Have you ever figured out the ending?” 

Sokka sighed and closed his eyes. “No. Like you, whenever Gran Gran tried to tell it to us, I just didn’t want to listen. I wanted the story to start and end with mom, you know?”

“Yes, I understand,” Katara sighed, tracing lines into the sand, feeling the grains beneath her fingertips. “I told it to Zuko one night, and he asked about the ending. I never wanted to find out because of mom, but now I wish I had.”

“How come you told that story to Zuko?” Sokka asked, elbowing Katara. 

“We were talking one night about our childhoods,” Katara explained. “And I told him that mom was a great storyteller. He asked me to tell him one, so I chose her last story.”

“Hmm, that’s really nice.” Sokka stretched his legs out in front of him, leaning back on his hands as he stared back at the ocean. “So, I’m assuming you and Zuko are good now?”

“Did he not tell you?” Katara asked, resting her elbow on her knee. “I assumed that’s what you were talking about this morning when I interrupted.”

Sokka shook his head. “No, I was telling him about how we found the estate. I did ask him what had happened, but he told me I should talk to you first.”

“Oh,” was all Katara could think of saying. Zuko had promised he wouldn’t tell Sokka anything unless Katara had wanted him to. 

“So,” Sokka said, elbowing her again, “you and Zuko? You’re good now?”

“Yes,” Katara replied, trying not to think of Miho’s words or Zuko holding her until she fell asleep or kissing Zuko despite the fact that she told herself she would never lay a hand on him. “Yes, we’re good now. He’s - he’s become important to me, Sokka. In such little time too.”

“A lot happened this past week, huh?” Sokka asked, rubbing the back of his neck. “Do you want to talk about it at all?”

“I think maybe I should,” Katara stated.

Sokka listened intently as Katara launched into her story. He sat up, crossing his legs once more and turning to face her, resting his chin in his hand as he focused on his sister. Katara told him about how she and Zuko were separated from Appa, how she was able to get them back to shore. She told Sokka about Miho, how the spitfire old woman took her and Zuko in despite knowing that there might be consequences. When she told Sokka about the soldiers, how they came to the village to find Yon Rha’s killer, how Hiratao had tried to assault her, Katara watched as Sokka’s eyes turned stormy, but she placed a calming hand on his arm.

“Zuko kept his promise, you know,” Katara told him. “His promise to keep me safe, to get me back to you. He kept his promise.”

Sokka nodded and motioned for Katara to continue. She glossed over most of what happened back at Miho’s, how Zuko said - well, she didn’t tell Sokka that, because he didn’t need to know, nor did she want him to know. She also didn’t tell him what happened when they were on Shuhon, though she did feel her heart begin to speed up when she reached that point.

“And now we’re here,”she finished lamely, Sokka still focusing on her dutifully. 

“Damn,” Sokka replied, shaking his head. “I had no idea, I’m sorry, Katara. Maybe we should have gone after you.”

“No, Zuko and I figured it out,” Katara told him. 

“I’m glad you and Zuko are finally friends,” Sokka replied, grinning. “It was getting tense with all the dirty looks you threw him and the insults hurled at him under your breath.”

“Oh, ha ha, very funny,” Katara replied, shoving Sokka’s shoulder. “But we spent all that time together, and I guess we just… listened to each other when we needed to. We became a team.”

Sokka placed a hand on Katara’s shoulder, looking at her thoughtfully. “Hey. Did something - did something happen when you guys were together?”

“Spirits, Sokka,  _ no!”  _ Katara exclaimed, feeling herself blush, but denying everything with such ferocity Sokka began to chuckle. “And even if something  _ did,  _ I wouldn’t tell you!”

“Yeah, you would,” Sokka countered, removing his hand from Katara’s shoulder and standing up. “Or, well, maybe not, but you can’t lie to your brother like that.”

Katara rolled her eyes and stood up too. “Nothing happened that you think happened. Just be happy that you don’t need to worry about me murdering Zuko while he sleeps.”

“Thank La for that,” Sokka teased, grinning. “Come on, Suki and I were planning on heading the market today since we need to get more food. I’m sure Aang wants to talk to you, too.”

Katara groaned. “Oh, no, what am I going to tell Aang?”

“The truth,” Sokka replied simply, motioning for Katara to follow him. “The more time you hide this from him, the worse it will get, right?”

“He’s not going to take this well,” Katara said, following her brother towards the path. 

“Maybe, maybe not,” Sokka agreed. “But you have to tell him.”

Katara didn’t reply, just fell into step behind Sokka. She was thankful, really and truly thankful, that she had Sokka be there for her. And while Zuko was great for the week, nothing could replace the comfort she found in Sokka. 

* * *

Though he was tired, Zuko stood on the edge of the courtyard with his arms crossed, watching Aang go through his different stances of firebending. Every once in a while, Zuko would bark out a correction, causing the younger boy to beam and correct his position. Toph sat next to Zuko, picking at her feet, snickering at whatever Zuko happened to mumble under his breath. Suki sat on Zuko’s other side, leaning on her hand and watching Aang go through the motions, occasionally yelling out praise whenever Zuko gave Aang his signature nod of approval.

“I really think my firebending has been lacking since you’ve been gone!” Aang stated once he was done, stretching his arms up above him.

“Why didn’t you practice while I was gone?” Zuko asked, rubbing his face tiredly when Aang just shrugged, his cheeks slowly going red. 

“Because he was too worried about you and Sugar Queen,” Toph answered for Aang.

“Hey!” Aang snapped, but he didn’t deny Toph’s statement. 

“Okay, you get him in the morning, Sugar Queen will get him before lunch, and I get him in the afternoon,” Toph told Zuko, turning her head up to address him. 

“Actually, can I have him one or two days?” Suki asked, leaning around Zuko to look at Toph. “I feel like Aang should know some basic hand to hand combat.”

Aang groaned. “Are you all trying to run me into the ground?”

“Sure, works for me,” Zuko replied, sitting next to the two girls, not even answering Aang’s question.

“Same,” Toph added, stretching her legs out in front of her just as Sokka and Katara walked back into the courtyard.

Zuko instinctively looked at Katara, their eyes meeting as though she sought him out just the same. She gave him a small, tired smile, one that reassured him that her and Sokka’s conversation went well. He noticed the way her shoulders were not longer tense, the way she walked just a bit straighter. 

When she had first appeared to Sokka and Zuko in the courtyard earlier, Zuko did not miss the redness of her eyes, the puffiness of her cheeks. She had been crying and if Sokka hadn’t been there standing beside him, Zuko would have reached out to her and pulled her into him tightly, giving her the reassurance she so desperately needed.

But now, standing next to Sokka, Katara looked… better, Zuko thought. More relaxed. Though they had become close the past week, Katara turning to Zuko to gain some semblance of peace in their days of adversity, Zuko knew it was Sokka Katara needed. 

“Hey!” Aang called out to them, raising a hand to the two siblings in greeting. “I was wondering where you two went.”

“Just talking,” Sokka said vaguely, walking over to Suki and offering her his hand. Suki grabbed it and Sokka pulled her up so that she stood in front of him. 

Zuko watched as Sokka tweaked Suki’s nose, causing her to scrunch up her nose before leaning forward and placing a small kiss on Sokka’s nose. He looked over at Katara who was watching the interaction with amusement, a small smile on her face.

“Anyways, since you guys are back, Suki and I are going to head into town and get more food,” Sokka said, lacing his fingers through Suki’s. 

“Anything you guys need?” Suki asked, glancing around at the other four.

When everyone shook their heads, Sokka and Suki turned and left, though Zuko did not miss the way Sokka’s head bent towards Suki, the way Suki leaned closer to listen to whatever it was he was saying to her. Zuko assumed that Katara had given Sokka permission to tell Suki what had happened; he couldn’t help but wonder if she told him  _ everything _ . 

Zuko’s heart tightened in his chest when he glanced back at Katara, but she did not notice him staring. Instead, she was focused on Aang.

“Aang, I think we need to talk too,” Katara told him, causing Aang to frown slightly but nod. 

“Sure, what’s up?” Aang asked.

Zuko stood up. “Uh, maybe Toph and I should go then.”

Katara shook her head, facing Zuko, her eyes pleading. “No, no. You guys can stay. Toph probably will want to hear this too.”

Zuko just nodded slowly, sinking back down on the ground next to Toph who perked up, her head tilted towards Katara as she waited for what the older girl had to say. 

“Katara, is everything okay?” Aang asked, taking a step towards her, his hand out. 

Katara just took a step back, her arms dangling lamely at her sides. She looked at Zuko again, that same pleading look on her face. Zuko knew what that meant, knew that she did not want to tell Aang what she did, but he gave her an encouraging nod. 

“Sugar Queen, your heart beat just spiked,” Toph commented, standing up and taking a step next to Aang, crossing her arms in front of her. “What happened?”

“I need to tell you something, but I don’t know if you’re going to like what I have to say,” Katara told them, mostly addressing Aang. 

“Whatever it is, you can tell me, Katara,” Aang assured her.

Katara took a deep breath in, taking one last look at Zuko before finally addressing Aang once more. “I found my mother’s killer.”

“Okay?” Aang replied, his brows furrowed as he stared at Katara. “That’s good then, right? You confronted him and now you feel better.”

“No, Aang,” Katara said, her voice flat. “I killed him.”

Her words hung in the air as Aang blinked up at Katara, his eyes widening, his hands balled into fists. Toph raised her eyebrows, a small smirk on her face as if impressed by Katara’s actions. Zuko stood up, standing away from the other three, knowing that if Katara needed him, she would call. 

“You killed him,” Aang repeated slowly, and Zuko did not miss the venom in his voice as he said those words. “Why?”

“Because he was a monster,” Katara replied simply, crossing her arms, not giving into Aang’s anger. “He was vile and cruel and he killed my mother. He deserved what he got.”

“His life wasn’t yours to take, Katara,” Aang stated, his voice raising as he took another step closer to Katara. “You didn’t need to get revenge!”

“Who said his life wasn’t mine to take?” Katara challenged, not backing down. “Did the Spirits tell you that? Did your past lives tell you that? Who decides whether someone lives or dies, Aang!”

“I don’t know! But taking another person’s life…” Aang paused, taking a breath, looking away from Katara. “Taking another’s life goes against everything the monks taught me, everything the Spirits taught me.”

“I’m not a monk,” Katara retorted. 

“You could have spared him!” Aang threw back, glaring at Katara once more. “You could have faced him, but spared his life!”

“I almost did, Aang, but in the end, I decided he didn’t deserve my mercy.” Katara’s voice was hard as she addressed the Avatar.

“And whose idea was it to kill him?” Aang yelled, pointing over at Zuko who flinched. “His? Did  _ he  _ get in your head?”

“Woah, calm down there, Aang,” Toph said finally, placing a hand on Aang’s shoulder. 

Aang just shrugged her hand off, still facing Katara, his face contorted with anger. “No! You killed a man when you didn’t need to!”

“He killed my mother because she was trying to protect me!” Katara shot back, finally uncrossing her arms, her hands balled into fists. “And I’ll have you know, I made this decision  _ myself _ ! I don’t need anyone telling me what to do! Not Zuko, and certainly not  _ you! _ ”

With that, Katara turned on her heel and stomped away, not even turning back to face them. 

“Wait!” Aang called after her, starting to follow her.

But Zuko was quicker, taking a few steps and reaching out his hand to place on Aang’s shoulder to tug him back. 

“Let her go,” Zuko told him. “She needs space.”

Aang shrugged Zuko’s hand off his shoulder, turning to glare at him. “Why didn’t you stop her! Why did you let her do this!”

“Because it was her choice to make, not mine,” Zuko insisted. 

“I should never have let her go,” Aang stated, starting to pace in front of Zuko.

“Woah, there, Twinkle Toes,” Toph said, taking a step forward. “ _ You  _ can’t control, Katara. She made the choice to go, she made the choice to kill him. All you can do is accept what she did and move on.”

Aang paused in front of Toph, placing his hands on his head. “But she -”

“This is  _ war _ , Aang,” Toph emphasized, placing her hands on his shoulders and shaking him. “People kill in war. Maybe Katara’s actions had nothing to do with this war directly, but the war inside herself. She needed this, Aang, and even though you might not approve, it’s too late. Get your head out of your ass and stop expecting everyone, especially Katara, to live by your morals!”

Aang swiped Toph’s hands off of him with his own and walked away without saying anything else. Luckily, he went the opposite way of Katara, leaving Zuko and Toph standing side by side.

“She really killed him?” Toph asked quietly, looking up at Zuko.

“Yes,” Zuko sighed, running a hand through his hair. “She really killed him.”

Toph whistled. “I guess I never saw her as a killer. Is she - is she doing okay?”

Zuko couldn’t help but smile at Toph’s words, the way Toph could sense how everyone is feeling just by their heartbeats. Though Toph could be rough around the edges, hiding behind her own mask of bravado, she knew when to be sensitive.

“She’s getting there,” Zuko answered. “It took awhile for her to open up to me, to explain what she was feeling. But I think she’ll be okay.”

Toph just nodded. “Good. But, damn, what a badass.”

“She is, isn’t she?” Zuko agreed. 

“Is that why your heart hasn’t slowed down since Katara entered the courtyard?” Toph asked, smirking up at Zuko. 

“What - I - what do you - ridiculous,” Zuko stuttered, waving his hand at Toph.

Toph laughed and elbowed Zuko in the ribs. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell.”

“Nothing to tell,” Zuko mumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“You’re telling me you two spent a week alone together and -” Toph began, but Zuko’s sputtering cut her off, causing her to grin. “Okay, okay. I’m going to go find Twinkle Toes. He’s probably with Appa.”

“Good idea,” Zuko grumbled.

Toph gave him one last pat on the arm before stalking off in the direction Aang went off to. Zuko just stared after her, feeling his cheeks go hot. Of course Toph would suspect something, feel the way his heart raced in his chest whenever he saw or thought of Katara, but he didn’t really know how to explain what he was feeling to the young blind girl. 

To be fair, he didn’t even realize he loved her until Miho pointed it out, and even then he kept denying his feelings for the waterbender. He had admired her since the first time they fought, sure, but he never suspected that he would develop feelings for her. 

After desperately wanting her approval, her friendship, he didn’t want to risk losing what they had. 

He didn’t want to risk losing  _ her.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to keep Aang's reaction realistic, but I also tried really hard not to paint him as the "bad guy" in this situation. I really like Aang a lot, so I know his anger is misplaced, so I'm hoping to maybe work through that as well. 
> 
> So, like I said last chapter, life caught up to me pretty quickly and while I know how I want this story to end, it's the next couple of chapters I need to sift through. I'm trying to figure out how much of Ember Island I want to focus on. If you have suggestions, I'd love to hear them! Though I do have chapter 16 written, I just need to reread. 
> 
> Anyways, thank you again for all the comments and kudos. Every comment means so much to me!


	16. so messed up here lately

After her argument with Aang, Katara had stalked off to her room, throwing herself onto her bed and curling up into herself. She grabbed a pillow, holding it tightly to her chest as she replayed the conversation with Aang over and over again in her mind. 

She knew Aang wouldn’t approve, she knew that Aang might react negatively towards the news that she had killed Yon Rha. What she wasn’t expecting was for Aang to blame  _ Zuko  _ for her decision. 

As if Zuko could sway her to think one or another. No, Zuko knew what Katara needed, knew she needed closure from the man who took her mother away. He knew that her anger and aggression, so misplaced towards Zuko, was geared towards not the Fire Nation as a whole, but towards the one person who caused her the most pain and suffering. Zuko gave her the push she needed towards closure, but he didn’t tell her to seek vengeance. She did that on her own. 

Katara laid still, holding the pillow close to her chest, her body all out of tears. She didn’t want to cry anyways, she had already done that. No, she wanted to avoid everyone for a little bit, avoid the responsibilities of being a waterbending master, a sister, a friend. 

A killer. That’s what she was now. While she was still grappling with this fact, still trying to sift through the feelings she associated with killing Yon Rha, she no longer felt as alone or as confused. 

A gentle knock came to the door, followed by Sokka’s voice. “Hey, Katara. Suki and I are making dinner if you would like to eat?”

“No, thank you,” Katara called back. “I just want to be alone right now.”

“Okay, sis,” Sokka replied. “I’m right downstairs if you need me.”

Katara listened as Sokka’s footsteps receded. She had a feeling Zuko or Toph must have told Sokka what happened, unless he gathered what had happened by himself based on the tense atmosphere that surrounded the estate. Not for the first time, Katara felt guilty for causing Sokka to worry about her. 

The sun was slowly making its descent, allowing the moon to finally come into view. As the shadows overtook the room, Katara thought about her mother’s story, about the sun and the moon and their forbidden love. How does that story end? 

Her stomach growled, signaling to her that she needed to eat something, needed to gather up her strength. How useful would she be in training the Avatar if she was weak and feeble?

Still, she didn’t want to go downstairs just yet. She didn’t want everyone to look at her with pity or fear, or even awe. No, what Katara wanted was for everyone to treat her the same way as before, to act as if nothing happened, as if she wasn’t a killer. The only person who was treating the same was Zuko, though even then his actions and words toward her were much more gentle, more subdued. He held her as she cried, but he didn’t treat her with pity, didn’t look at her any differently than before.

If Katara was being honest, she currently craved Zuko’s presence; she craved the way he placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, offering her a listening ear while she rambled on about her thoughts, her feelings, her dreams, and her wishes. She craved his comforting silence, the way he didn’t even have to say anything to her but she still understood that he was by her side. 

Slowly, Katara sat up in bed, throwing the pillow towards the headrest. She swung her legs over the side, placing her feet on the cool hardwood floor and standing up. Without much thought, she went over to her boots and tugged them on. Then, as quietly as possible, she opened her bedroom door and looked out into the hallway. When she determined no one was upstairs, she tiptoed towards the stairs, listening at the top for her friends down in the kitchen. She could hear their boisterous conversation, Sokka loudly telling a story to keep everyone’s spirits up. If she was lucky, Katara could sneak down the stairs and out the front door of the estate without anyone noticing her. 

Tiptoeing down the stairs as carefully as possible, Katara paused at the foot of the stairs, cocking her head as she listened for her friends. No one called out to her, no one noticed her, so she bolted out the front door without looking back. Outside, she took a deep, freeing breath. Though she had only been there a mere few hours, Katara was already familiar with the path to the beach, the familiar tugging at her veins that pulled her towards the water. 

Wrapping her arms around herself, Katara made her way towards the private beach, Yue in the sky her only companion. Even then, the moon wasn’t full just yet, but it provided her with enough light to find her way towards the water, sitting just where the tide meets the sand. Pulling her boots off, Katara sat down, stretching her legs out in front of her and digging her toes in the sand, feeling the sensation tickle her feet. Occasionally, the water washed over her feet, cold and numbing.

Though she continued to feel the tug of the ocean in her veins, Katara decided she didn’t want to practice her bending. Instead, she wanted to relax, to let the ocean sooth her as opposed to becoming her weapon. 

Twenty minutes Katara sat alone, laying on her back with her eyes closed, listening to the sounds of the ocean. With each ebb and flow, she practiced her breathing, meditating to allow her senses to wash away.

“How come I knew I’d find you here?” 

Katara didn’t need to see him to know who approached. After spending a week alone with Zuko, Katara had become familiar with his low rasp, the tone in his voice that signaled that he was teasing her. Above her, she heard him walk closer and sit down next to her. She felt his hand on her arm, warm and soothing. 

“Is it working?” he asked her, removing his hand from her and laying down next to her. Though he didn’t specify, Katara knew what he meant.

“Yes, it’s working,” she answered. “With each ebb and flow, I take a deep breath in and a deep breath out. I’m focusing on the ocean, the way the waves crash into each other, the way the water hits the sand. It’s calming.”

“Hmm,” Zuko hummed beside her, causing Katara to open her eyes to look at him. His hands were folded on his stomach, his eyes were closed. He must have taken his own shoes off when he sat because they sat a few feet away from him.

“What do you do?” Katara asked him.

“I just sit, I guess,” Zuko explained, opening his eyes and turning to look at her. “I do my best to clear my mind, to focus only on my breathing. I take a deep breath in and count to eight. I take a deep breath out, also counting eight. Sometimes, if I can’t focus, I focus on my senses.”

“How do you do that?” Katara asked, rolling over onto her side and propping herself on her elbow.

“Well, sometimes I count four things I smell,” Zuko told her. “Or, three sights I see. Two sounds I hear.” 

“Does that work?” 

Zuko shrugged. “Sometimes. For example, right now, I smell… the ocean. I still smell the komodo chicken Sokka burned wafting from the house.”

“I’ll have to try that,” Katara replied, laying back down on her back and staring up at the sky. The stars twinkled above her. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Zuko asked her.

How was it that Zuko knew what she was thinking about without having to even ask her? Had he always been able to do that? 

“Only if you want to, of course,” he assured her. 

“Aang has this tendency to put me on a pedestal,” Katara stated, not even holding back. “It’s like he has this idealized version of me in his mind that he can’t get rid of, or that he  _ refuses  _ to try and see around. It’s not fair.”

“No, it’s not,” Zuko agreed. 

“He thinks I’m absolutely perfect, but I’m  _ not _ ,” Katara continued, sitting up and pulling her knees to her chest. “He expects me to live up to  _ his  _ morals and  _ his  _ expectations, but I can’t do that. I can’t be what he wants me to be.”

Zuko sat up as well, placing a hand on Katara’s back, not saying anything.

“And it’s not fair,” Katara stated, “but I feel...bad about it. I feel selfish for not being able to live up to expectations. Like, I’m taking too much time for myself.”

“Katara, that’s not selfish,” Zuko told her, his hand rubbing circles around her back. “That’s called being human.”

“And I know I shouldn’t be angry but I  _ am _ ,” Katara sighed. “I’m angry at him for thinking I am someone who is perfect, and I’m angry at myself for not having my shit together.”

Zuko snorted, and Katara just raised her eyebrows at him. Shaking his head, he said, “Sorry, I’m not laughing at you. It’s funny that you expect  _ anyone  _ to have their shit together.”

Katara let out a small laugh at that. “I guess you’re right there. But I’m right to feel this way?”

“I think so,” Zuko said slowly, considering his words. “I mean, like I said, no one is perfect. Humans are fickle beings, as my uncle might say. We all have needs we have to meet, but being perfect is not one of them. Social and physical needs can only be met if we allow them to be.”

“When did you become so wise?” Katara teased, moving closer to Zuko. 

“I told you, my uncle,” Zuko shrugged. “But, Katara, I know Aang seems to have this perfect version of you in his mind, but have you ever thought that sometimes you think too much of him?”

Katara blinked. “What - what do you mean?”

“I mean that you also tend to place really big expectations on him,” Zuko explained. “And maybe you don’t mean to do that, but he’s only a fifteen year old kid. And he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.”

“So, what do you mean?” Katara asked again.

“I mean that sometimes you - actually all of us - put so much pressure on him when he’s trying so hard to figure it all out” Zuko continued, shaking his hair out of his face. 

“I guess that makes sense,” Katara replied.

To be fair, she hadn’t considered that she might have been putting too much pressure on the young Avatar. Ever since she found Aang in the iceberg, she assumed that he would be the one to find balance in the world. She didn’t  _ mean  _ to do this, it was just that Aang gave her hope.

“So, we give each other hope,” Katara told Zuko, mulling over her thoughts. “And because of that, we tend to expect too much of each other.”

“Exactly,” Zuko agreed, nodding. “And I know you don’t mean to do, and I know Aang doesn’t mean to either, but it’s just something we all tend to do. Like I said, we’re all human. But we need to recognize that there’s more than hope and justice. We all get angry and we all grieve. Sometimes our morals clash, and we have to learn to coincide with each other.”

“Your uncle did a great job raising you,” Katara stated, resting her head on Zuko’s shoulder. “I hope you know that.”

“I do now,” Zuko told her, sighing deeply. “I am sorry you’re feeling this way. It’s not fair that he got angry with you, or that he didn’t understand.”

“I just don’t want him to think I’m a monster,” Katara said quietly. 

“He doesn’t think you’re a monster,” Zuko assured her. “Maybe he’s confused, but he doesn’t think of you any less.”

“Maybe,” Katara mumbled, as Zuko wrapped an arm around her.

They sat there quietly for a moment, that comfortable silence Katara had come to appreciate as the days passed. Though they did not talk, Katara’s mind still raced with different thoughts; thoughts of Aang, of Zuko, of… everything else. 

“Remember when you asked me if I loved Aang?” Katara asked Zuko suddenly. 

“Sure, that was the same night I told you about Mai,” Zuko replied simply. “Why?”

“I do love Aang,” Katara stated, “but I love him like a friend, like someone I don’t think I can lose. And maybe his love for me is misplaced.”

“Perhaps.” Zuko gave a small shrug. “But you don’t know what his heart feels, only he does. You know what your heart wants or needs, but you don’t need to change yourself for someone else.” 

“But maybe he only  _ thinks  _ he loves me?” Katara offered, taking her head off Zuko’s shoulder and turning her body to face Zuko, Zuko’s arm dropping from around her shoulder.

Zuko looked at her, a small frown on his face. “I guess so. But, again, we don’t really know.”

Katara studied Zuko’s face, the small crease between his brows as he thought. Again, he wasn’t looking at her any differently, not that she noticed anyways. Has he always looked at her with such longing in his eyes?

“Miho said something to me,” Katara told him, facing Zuko completely, crossing her legs. 

Zuko raised his eyebrow at her. “What did she say to you?”

“When she was wrapping up my arm,” Katara continued, holding up her left arm for Zuko to see. “We were talking about what had happened, and I was worried about you. And - well - she had said something. About you.” 

“Okay?” Zuko mirrored Katara’s position, placing his hands on his knees. 

“She said - well, she said that she’s never seen someone love another so fiercely like - like you love me.” Katara let the words tumble out of her mouth before she could stop herself, watching as Zuko’s eyes widened at her statement. 

“Ah,” Zuko replied, rubbing the back of his neck. “That’s - uh, that’s interesting, I guess.”

“But I told her you were playing a role!” Katara insisted, feeling herself flush as Zuko stood up in front of her. “I told her you didn’t actually  _ mean  _ what you told the soldiers.”

“Right,” Zuko agreed, beginning to pace. 

Worried, Katara stood up as well, watching as Zuko paced in front of her, his hand still rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Zuko?” She reached out, placing her hand on his arm, stopping him in his tracks. He looked up at her, his eyes still wide, confusion and fear clear in his expression. “What are you thinking about?”

“She - she said the same thing to me.” Zuko swallowed, letting his hand drop to his side, not making eye contact with Katara. “Not in so many words, but she mentioned it.”

“Okay.”

A beat.

“Do you?” Katara asked, placing a hand on Zuko’s scarred cheek and turning his head to look at her, his gold eyes meeting hers. 

“Do I what?” Zuko asked, raising his hand to rest on top of hers, resting his head in the palm of her hand. 

“Love me?” It was a simple question, yet Zuko closed his eyes, taking a deep breath in. “You don’t have to answer.”

“Do you want me to?” Zuko asked, opening his eyes again. At Katara’s tilt of the head, he clarified, “Love you, that is.”

“I don’t know,” Katara admitted. 

“Okay,” Zuko replied, letting go of her hand. 

Just like at the inn, Katara felt herself leaning forward, going up on her tiptoes. Zuko didn’t meet her this time, just closed his eyes again, Katara’s lips meeting his. He waited for her to deepen the kiss, his lips parting slightly for her. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders, his hands found their way to her waist.

While last time was confusing and fast, tinged with desperation, this kiss was tentative, relaxed. He matched her moves, waited for her to continue. While he pulled away first last time, Katara was the first to pull away now.

She rested her forehead against his, her fingers tracing the hair at the nape of his neck.

“I’m confused,” she confessed. 

“About what?” he asked, pulling her closer to him, his arms wrapped around her. 

“About a lot of things,” Katara stated. “I’m confused about what I’m doing, I’m confused about my feelings.”

Zuko didn’t say anything, just listened.

“I’m confused about my feelings for you,” Katara admitted. “It took me so long to trust you again, to open myself back up to you. And so quickly, you’ve become so important to me.”

“You’re important to me too, Katara,” Zuko said, moving his head away from her so that he could look at her better. “But I don’t want to cause you any more confusion, that’s not fair to you.”

“I just - I  _ like  _ what we have,” Katara told him. “And I’m scared of changing that.”

Zuko nodded. “Okay, I understand that.”

“I don’t want to know,” Katara said. “I don’t want to know if you love me.”

“Why’s that?” Zuko asked, moving a piece of hair from Katara’s face, his fingers brushing her temple. 

“Because I don’t know what love is,” Katara said honestly. “And in the middle of the war, I don’t know if I want to deal with love.”

Zuko just nodded, his arms loosening around Katara as he took a step away from her. For some reason, Katara felt ashamed, though Zuko didn’t make any inclination that he was angry with her. Still, she had to be sure.

“Are you mad at me?” she asked, watching as Zuko walked over to his shoes. 

“No, Katara, I’m not mad at you,” Zuko answered, tugging one his shoes one at a time. He gave her a soft smile before going over to her shoes, picking them up and handing them over to her. 

“You should be,” Katara told him, not even bothering to put her shoes on. Instead, she curled her toes in the sand, focusing on the way the sand tickled her toes. 

“But I’m not,” Zuko assured her. “Katara, I’m not going to get mad at you for being confused about your feelings. If you’re not sure how you feel, or you want to focus on you, then that’s okay. I’ll stand by you and help you figure it out. But I’m never, ever, going to be angry because of how you feel.”

Katara didn’t reply, just looked down at the sand. 

Zuko took her free hand in his, lacing his fingers through hers. “Come on. You haven’t eaten all day, you’re probably starving.”

At that, Katara heard her stomach grumble, and Katara looked up to see Zuko smirking. 

“See?” he pointed out, tugging at her hand. “Let’s go back to the estate.”

Katara let Zuko lead her away from the ocean, away from the soft tugging at her veins. 

“Hey, Zuko?” she said, causing Zuko to turn to look at her. “Thanks. For everything.”

Zuko smiled. “Anything for you, Katara.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> of COURSE Katara had to bring up what Miho had said to her the week prior; it needed to be addressed! but as I was writing, having Zuko admit to Katara that he loved her so early on in the story (lol, like we're not on chapter 16, oops!) felt... idk wrong? not wrong, but he's sure not ready for it. And honestly, neither is Katara. She's finally getting used to him, she finally feels like she found someone she trusts and cares for, and, like I had her say, she's confused about her feelings. I'm definitely planning on this coming up again through the Ember Island players (hold me to it!!). I also plan on hopefully fleshing out some other group dynamics as someone in the comments pointed out! 
> 
> Anyways, any and all feedback welcome! Thank you for all the kinds words and kudos! Love you all!


	17. stay the way you are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little mish mash of a bunch of things, I think. Either way, it expands mostly on chapter 15 than 16, though yes that almost love confession will be addressed. It's also shorter than the rest because stuck lol
> 
> Anyways, thank you to @lumosflies for reading this chapter over for me!!

The next day the tension slipped away from the estate, everyone collectively deciding to pretend that nothing had happened the day before. 

As planned, Zuko and Aang practiced early in the morning, as soon as the sun made its ascent into the sky. The young Avatar wasn’t acting  _ cold _ towards Zuko, per se, but his posture was different, his tone of voice when they spoke signaled to Zuko that something was not completely right, but Aang would never come right out and say what was wrong. 

Still, Zuko ran through the motions with Aang, having the younger boy copy his exact moves, watching as Aang’s face turned steadily redder, anger coursing through his veins. Though he wanted to warn Aang not to let his inner fire depend on pure anger alone, Zuko decided to stay silent, correcting Aang when needed instead. 

“Lift your leg a little higher,” Zuko demanded, watching as Aang kicked into the air, releasing a burst of flames from his foot. Aang grunted with effort, landing down hard when he brought his foot back to the ground. Zuko shook his head. “Power in firebending comes from the breath, not the muscles. Run it again.”

Aang mumbled something under his breath, but ran the drill again, this time focusing less on his landing, but the fluidity of his motions. When he finished, he looked at Zuko expectantly. 

“Better?” Aang asked, his tone not exactly harsh, but not kind either. 

“Yes,” Zuko nodded. “But I think you’re done for today. You’re too distracted, you need to get out of that head of yours.”

“Sure,” Aang clipped, walking over to the fountain that rested in the middle of the courtyard, grabbing his shirt that hung on the side. 

“Your anger is very misplaced,” Zuko observed, walking over and standing in front of Aang, blocking the younger boy’s path to stop him from leaving. 

“I don’t know what you mean,” Aang retorted, now pulling on his boots, refusing to look up at Zuko. 

“You’re mad at Katara and that’s not fair,” Zuko told him, stepping in front of Aang when Aang tried to side step him. 

“No offense, Zuko, but you don’t have any say in this,” Aang snapped, trying to go around Zuko once more, but Zuko blocked him again. 

“Do you want to know what happened once Katara and I washed up on that island?” Zuko said firmly, crossing his arms and glaring down at Aang. “The first thing Katara thought of when we finally found shelter?”

“Zuko, I -” Aang started, but Zuko held a hand up. 

“The first thing out of Katara’s mouth was that she was worried about  _ you _ ,” Zuko continued. 

Aang blinked. “What?”

“We lost Appa,” Zuko explained, uncrossing his arms and sighing. “The storm was bad enough that we got thrown off of him and he flew on without us. After washing up on the island, I found us some shelter. Katara was upset because she had been bending the rain, but it was too harsh. Then she remembered how you already lost Appa once, and, well, she was worried about how you would react.”

“I didn’t know that,” Aang mumbled.

“How would you?” Zuko asked him. “That’s why I’m telling you. Because even after everything that happened with her, she was still thinking of you and everyone else. Because that’s who Katara is. Even when her whole world is going to shit, she still finds the time to care for everyone else!”

Aang sighed, still looking away from Zuko, biting his lip thoughtfully. 

“And I understand that her killing Yon Rha conflicts with every single one of your teachings, but you need to look at this from Katara’s point of view.” Zuko knew he was rambling at this point, but he couldn’t stop. “You can disagree with her and her morals all you want, but please… just look at this from her point of view.”

“Why are you even defending her?” Aang asked, his brow furrowed at Zuko. “After the way she treated you.”

“Because, we got… closer,” Zuko said carefully, thinking out each word. “We learned to understand each other, that’s all.”

“And you think you understand her better than I do?” Aang challenged, raising an eyebrow at Zuko.

“No, I’m not saying that at all,” Zuko replied, gritting his teeth. “I’m not saying either of us understand her fully, and we need to accept that. Just  _ talk  _ to her Aang. She’s broken up about this.”

Aang scoffed. “Sure, she is.”

“Aang, all in all, she cares about you,” Zuko explained. “She was worried about how you would react, and I think both of you sitting down and figuring this out together will help you both.”

“I - I guess that’s fair,” Aang replied, rubbing his head.

“And you can blame me all you want,” Zuko stated. “I pushed her to find him, but I didn’t push her to kill him. That was her decision all on her own.”

“Yeah, okay,” Aang sighed. “I’m sorry, Zuko.”

“Don’t apologize to me,” Zuko told him, shaking his head. “Apologize to her.”

“Yeah, I will,” Aang promised, bouncing on his toes, his usual energy returning to him. “Can I go now? I missed breakfast and I don’t want Sokka to eat all the lychee nuts.”

“Yeah, get out of here.” Zuko waved Aang off, watching as the younger boy bounced away, more pip in his step. 

Zuko sighed and dropped to the ground, crossing his legs beneath him. Although he and Aang meditated before practicing, Zuko decided he needed just a bit more time to think.

Sitting up straight, pressing his fists together, and closing his eyes, Zuko took a deep breath in, counting to eight. With every breath, Zuko tried to push away his thoughts that swam through his brain.

He had a nightmare the night before, one that lingered in his memory throughout the morning, creeping up on him as he tried to focus on training Aang. Zuko hadn’t had a nightmare that bad since before he returned to the Fire Nation all those months ago. What worried Zuko most was that he barely  _ remembered  _ what his nightmare was about. He knew his mother and father flew in and out of his dream, he remembered Azula taunting him, but he wasn’t sure what else happened. 

No, he remembered the burning. Zuko always remembered what it was like to burn. 

When he had woken up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night, Zuko immediately looked to his right, half expecting Katara to be curled up next to him. He felt a twinge of disappointment when he realized that she was in her own bed down the hall and he had to fight the urge to get out of his bed and go to her room. 

With another deep breath in, Zuko thought about his conversation with Katara the night before. In a way, he was relieved that Katara did not want to know his feelings. Because if she wanted to know, that would make his feelings seem more real, more tangible. Because even though he  _ knew  _ he loved her, telling her out loud… well, that just seemed to be too much. 

Katara was right, love in the middle of war was difficult. Not only that, but there was a small voice in the back of Zuko’s mind that kept telling him that he was not worthy of her love, or even her friendship. 

“Fuck,” Zuko said out loud, opening his eyes and running a hand down his face. 

Slowly getting up, he went back to the estate, pushing down any unwanted or unnecessary feelings. 

* * *

Katara was in the kitchen when Aang sauntered in, his eyes catching her just as she turned away from the sink, placing a plate on the side to dry. She was humming to herself, a tune that Aang didn’t recognize. When she turned, she caught his eyes, giving him a strained smile.

“Morning, Aang,” she greeted politely with a small bow of her head. “How was training with Zuko?”

“Tiring,” Aang replied honestly, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. 

“Hm,” Katara hummed. “Seems like you’re out of shape.”

“I didn’t really practice when you and Zuko were gone,” Aang admitted, feeling slightly silly. Even after their fight, Katara was still being polite to him, giving him a kind, knowing smile. 

“You were worried, I get it,” Katara told him, moving to the table and taking a seat. 

Aang took the seat across from her, staring at her head on. “Katara, I just wanted to apologize for what I said last night.” 

“Okay,” Katara replied, tilting her head to the side for Aang to continue.

“It wasn’t fair of me to just assume you would follow  _ my  _ moral code,” Aang told her. “And while I don’t exactly agree with what you did, I need to learn to accept your decision.”

“That’s really mature of you, Aang,” Katara replied, her smiling widening. 

“Well, it was Toph and Zuko who talked some sense into me,” Aang admitted, returning her smile. “But it was unfair how I treated you and I’m sorry.”

“Thank you, Aang, that means a lot to me,” Katara said, reaching across the table and placing a gentle hand on his. Aang felt his heart skip when Katara gave it a small squeeze before pulling her hand away. “I’m sorry, too, by the way.”

“For what?” Aang asked, blinking. 

“For leaving,” Katara said with a small shrug. 

“I told you, it was a journey you needed to take,” Aang insisted. “You have nothing to be sorry about.”

Katara gave him another smile before standing up. “Have you eaten yet?”

“Not yet,” Aang told her. “I skipped it before training with Zuko.”

“Well, let’s get you something to eat and then me and you can head to the beach to practice waterbending,” Katara told him, already bustling around the kitchen. 

Aang just watched her, leaning his chin on his hand as Katara began talking amicably. While he watched her, though, something in the back of his mind told him that even though they talked everything out, there was still something off. Aang just couldn’t figure out what it was.

* * *

Suki was the first one to wake up the next morning, Sokka’s strong arms wrapped around her tightly. She adjusted herself so that her chin rested on Sokka’s shoulder; from her position, she had a perfect view of his face. Despite being energetic and animated during the day, Sokka always looked so peaceful when he slept. He looked younger in a way, younger than his eighteen years. When he slept, all of his worries and tension slipped away, leaving a boy who was just as vulnerable as the rest of the crew. 

Sighing to herself, Suki gently stroked her finger along Sokka’s cheek, watching his nose twitch at the feeling. Laughing, she poked his cheek.

“Wake up, sleepy head,” she murmured, scooting herself closer to him to kiss his chin. 

“Five minutes,” he muttered sleepily, arms still tight around Suki. 

“You told me to wake you up nice and early,” she chastised, now pulling herself out of his arms and sitting up beside him.

Sokka let out a soft whimper when he felt her weight shift off of him. “Suuuuuki, come on.”

“Come on, love, wake up,” she repeated, slowly making her way out of bed.

Though before she could leave, Sokka’s hand shot out and grabbed her wrist. She looked behind her, Sokka now fully awake and staring at her.

“I don’t want to face today,” Sokka said softly, letting go of Suki’s wrist. “It’s all too much.”

Suki sat back down on the bed facing Sokka as he sat up, rubbing the dreariness from his eyes. “Why is it all too much?”

“We’re one step closer to the comet, and we still don’t have a solid plan,” Sokka said, face in his hands. “And - and I’m still trying to come to terms with what Katara told me.”

“What do you mean?” Suki placed a hand on Sokka’s back.

“I understand the decision she made to kill our mother’s killer,” Sokka told her, looking up at Suki. “But I promised my dad I would protect her. I feel like I did a shit job, that’s all.”

“Sokka,” Suki said, with a slight click of her tongue. “You’re doing the best you can.”

“Am I, though?” Sokka asked, shaking his head. “Who just lets their little sister go off and find the man who murdered their mother?”

“Sokka, you and I both know that nobody would have been able to stop her,” Suki said, wrapping her arms around Sokka in a hug. “You’re protecting her the best way you can, and I know for a fact that she appreciates it.”

“I suppose so,” Sokka conceded, holding Suki close to him. “Everything just feels so big. I can’t really put it into words.”

“I get it, love, I do,” Suki assured him, kissing his cheek. “Unfortunately, we live in a world dominated by war. And what sucks the most about this whole situation is that this world is all we know.” 

“If we’re lucky, maybe we’ll finally know what peace looks like,” Sokka commented, pulling away from Suki to look at her. “Maybe we can finally…. Figure out what our future holds?”

Suki grinned, grabbing Sokka’s hand and lacing her fingers through his. “Yes, maybe we can do that.”

“Out of curiosity, what  _ does _ our future hold?” Sokka asked, raising his eyebrow at her and leaning in towards her. 

Suki gave him a sad smile, stroking his thumb with hers. “I don’t know for sure, Sokka. But I would like to get through this fight first.”

“Yeah, me too,” Sokka replied, before placing a gentle kiss on Suki’s lips. 

Suki kissed him back, wishing that she and Sokka  _ could  _ just lay in bed all day without a care in the world. But this was war, and unfortunately, Suki gave up such luxuries as soon as she entered the Kyoshi Warriors. 

For now, she would count her blessings, pulling Sokka closer to her as if he were the only person in the world. 


	18. island in the sun

The days on Ember Island slowly started to bleed together as Team Avatar, as Sokka so aptly called them, continued preparing for the arrival of Sozin’s Comet. 

Katara was thankful to be back around her brother and friends, and she was even more grateful to be given a purpose again. Not that helping Miho and the rest of the tiny village wasn’t enough, it was just that Katara felt more useful when she was training with Aang or cooking meals with Sokka or Zuko, or even shopping with Suki. She had missed Toph’s quick wit and Suki’s advice; she missed Sokka’s over exaggerated stories and even more over exaggerated plans; she even missed the way Aang’s eyes lit up whenever he finally perfected a move. 

While she knew Aang’s apology to be sincere, Katara could not help but think to herself that she wanted more, but of what she wasn’t exactly sure. Either way, the two of them had gotten back into their rhythm, Katara the master and Aang the student, each pretending that their fight did not happen.

But the thing was, their fight  _ did  _ happen and Katara was still having a hard time of letting it go. There was a lingering feeling telling her that it was because she  _ knew  _ Aang’s reaction ahead of time, and she knew that no matter how hard she begged or hoped, her friends were going to look at her differently. Katara did not want to, but she slowly learned to live with it. 

Thus, life on Ember Island continued, and Katara found herself taking over her role as team mother once more. While she did not wake up as early as Zuko or Aang did, Katara woke up early enough to have breakfast made for when the two boys were done training and for when Sokka, Suki, and Toph finally woke up and stalked down into the kitchen. She even found herself cleaning the various nooks and crannies of the estate whenever she found some down time in her day to sooth her racing mind. 

Occasionally, when it was time to make dinner, Zuko would help her, sidling up next to her and offering her a hand without much thought. There was one night when Sokka walked into the kitchen, fully prepared to help Katara with dinner, only to find his sister and Zuko deep in conversation, their movements in sync with each other’s, not even noticing that Sokka had entered the room until he cleared his throat two minutes later. 

Sokka was not only the one to sense the change between Katara and Zuko, but no one made any mention of it. Katara tried to ignore Sokka’s knowing smirk, or Suki’s questioning eyes, but she knew what they were thinking. Of course, she wanted to talk to Sokka about her conversation with Zuko that night on the beach, but she did not want to face reality just yet. She did not want Sokka’s life lessons reverberating in her brain so close to the comet. 

One afternoon, right before lunch, Katara and Toph sat in the courtyard off to the side watching Suki train Aang in hand to hand combat. Aang had already trained with Katara, a particularly difficult day, and he was clearly overexerting himself, but he did not dare complain. With the comet a week and a half away, Aang knew that he needed every ounce of help he could get, including styles of fighting that nonbenders tended to use. Sokka and Zuko had gone off, finding a separate area where they could train together with their swords. Though knowing Sokka, he definitely got Zuko off topic. 

“I sense a change in you, Katara,” Toph said suddenly. She was lying next to Katara, her hands under head as her milky eyes stared up at the sky. She had her left foot resting on her right knee. 

“Gee, I wonder why,” Katara deadpanned, rolling her eyes at the young girl lying next to her. She focused back on Suki and Aang, watching as Suki corrected Aang’s stance, kicking his foot gently with her own. 

“No, no, not like that,” Toph corrected, sitting up and crossing her legs before her. “I don’t sense you being, like, a killer or anything. I just mean that you seem… calmer. More sure of yourself.”

“Calm? Toph, we are a week and a half away from the comet, what do you mean I seem calmer?” Katara asked, shaking her head. 

“I  _ mean _ you don’t seem as stuffy, I guess,” Toph emphasized, shrugging. “I think that facing him helped you whether you thought it did or not.”

Katara thought about that. The nightmares had subsided only a bit, but Katara did feel a small change in herself. Of course, she didn’t really recognize it until Toph pointed it out. 

“How about this,” Toph added, snapping her fingers, “you seem like you’re not carrying this big weight around, as if you don’t have this heavy burden on your shoulders holding you down.”

“Yeah,” Katara replied slowly, rolling her shoulders as if Toph’s weight was literal as opposed to figurative. “Now that you mention it, I do feel lighter.”

“And I bet not holding a grudge against Sparky helped too, huh?” Toph teased, elbowing Katara, her smirk widening. 

“Shush,” Katara chastised, swatting Toph with her hand. 

“It was never about Sparky was it?” Toph asked, resting her chin in her hands and considering Katara thoughtfully. “There was more to it, wasn’t there? Something deeper.”

Katara sighed. “He definitely hurt me in Ba Sing Se, but yes, Toph, my anger towards him definitely was deeper than the surface.”

“You seem better around him,” Toph commented. At Katara’s small hum of question, she continued, “I mean, again, more relaxed. More comfortable.”

“Hm, I guess,” Katara replied, looking at Suki and Aang once more. Though as soon as she focused on the pair, Suki landed a solid punch on Aang’s cheek, causing Aang to stagger backward.

“Oof, Suki hit him hard, didn’t she?” Toph asked, glancing towards where Suki was now patting Aang’s shoulder in comfort. 

“Yep,” Katara grimaced. “I know he’s the Avatar and he has all forms of bending at his will, but I agree with Suki: knowing how to fight with your fists can really come in handy.”

“Humph, I’m glad I don’t have to do that,” Toph commented, wincing at the sound of Aang falling backwards on his butt. “Though I admire her for not holding back.”

Katara grinned. “Yeah, me too.” 

Suki helped Aang stand up, Aang rubbing his back as he stood. Katara watched as Suki gave Aang another encouraging pat on the shoulder before the two made their way over to where Katara and Suki sat.

“Well, that absolutely sucked,” Aang stated as both Katara and Toph stood up in front of him. 

“Don’t be a baby, Twinkle Toes,” Toph told him, punching him on the arm, hard. “It’s important you know all of this.”

“I know,” Aang replied, rubbing his sore arm. “Still, it hurts. A lot.”

“It was only your second day,” Suki assured him. “Don’t get so down on yourself.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Aang replied, looking at Katara somewhat expectantly. 

For some reason, Katara felt anger surge through her, but the feeling quickly dissipated as she replied, “Yeah, Aang. You’ll get it. Don’t worry.”

“Come on you,” Toph said, grabbing Aang’s wrist and pulling him towards the estate. “Let’s eat something quick, then me and you go train.” 

“Ugh,” Aang groaned, but he allowed Toph to pull him away, looking back at Katara with one last wave before Toph tugged him once more. 

Katara sighed, earning her a look from Suki. 

“Are you okay?” Suki asked, tilting her head to the side in question. “When Aang looked at you, I thought I saw a flash of anger.”

“You saw that?” Katara asked, feeling herself flush. “Awkward.”

“What’s on your mind?” the older girl asked, giving Katara a kind smile. 

“It’s silly,” Katara told her, “but Aang always begs for my approval and it’s starting to bother me. It never used to before, but now, for some reason, it just… is.” 

The last part fell flat when she said those words, but Suki still gave Katara a pat on the shoulder. 

“He’s just trying to make you proud, Katara,” Suki told her.

“That’s just it! I am proud of him,” Katara exclaimed. “But ever since I got back, ever since I told him what I did, his actions just seem so forced.”

“He apologized to you, right?” Suki asked.

“Yes, but I don’t know,” Katara replied. “I’m still so confused.” 

“I’m sorry, Katara,” Suki replied, grimacing in sympathy. “That’s really frustrating.” 

Katara shrugged, but felt herself smile when she looked at Suki. “Mind teaching me some moves?”

Suki grinned. “Yes, absolutely. I’ve been waiting for you to ask! Come on!”

Suki grabbed Katara’s wrist and dragged her to the middle of the courtyard, Katara laughing as she followed. Once in position, Katara was soon listening to Suki’s every word, copying the older girl’s every move, step by step. She listened to Suki’s advice, opening her stance, keeping her arms close to her. 

That was how Sokka and Zuko found them moments later, Katara sending a punch Suki’s way which Suki easily sidestepped. 

“Better stick to waterbending, sis,” Sokka called, throwing his sword over his shoulder and elbowing Zuko next to him. “What do you think, Zuko?”

Zuko shrugged. “With enough practice, I’m sure Katara will be fine.”

“Boo, you’re boring,” Sokka replied, sticking his tongue out at Zuko. 

“Zuko’s right anyways,” Suki said, giving Katara a high five as they walked towards the boys. “She’ll get it, don’t worry.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Sokka replied, waving his hand. “So you say.”

“She’s already better than you,” Suki teased, causing Sokka to dramatically place a hand on his chest, looking absolutely offended.

“Suki, you wound me,” Sokka replied dramatically with a heavy sigh. 

Katara snickered. “Go be dramatic somewhere else.”

“Fine, Suki and I were planning on going to the market today anyways,” Sokka replied, sticking his nose in the air. 

Suki looked at Katara and rolled her eyes before looking back at her boyfriend, grabbing his upper arm. “Come on you, let’s go.”

With that, Sokka and Suki walked away with Sokka looking at Suki with wide eyes, as if she were the only thing in the world. Katara felt a pang in her heart when she saw them, saw the love between them.

“Hey, you okay?” Zuko asked, placing a hand on Katara’s shoulder. 

“Yes, I’m okay,” Katara replied, placing her opposite hand on Zuko’s, looking up at him carefully. 

His face was still red from fighting with Sokka, his sweaty hair sticking to his forehead. Still, his face was relaxed when he looked back at Katara, a small tug at the corners of his lips.

“Why did you want to learn hand to hand combat?” Zuko asked, removing his hand from Katara’s shoulder. 

“It would be good to know, wouldn’t it?” Katara countered, raising an eyebrow at Zuko. “Isn’t that why you fight with broadswords?”

Zuko rubbed the back of his neck. “I guess, but it’s a little different.”

“Wait, how so?” Katara aked, taking a step towards Zuko. “I just assumed… well, I assumed you just learned to become more powerful? But maybe that was my biased thinking, since this was from before we became - before you joined us.”

“I learned how to fight with broadswords when I was younger,” Zuko explained, sighing. “I didn’t show any signs of bending until I was almost seven or eight. By the time she was three, Azula was pretty much a prodigy and I could barely produce a flame.”

Katara blinked up at him, surprised. She had always assumed that Zuko had always been a powerful firebender, one that could hold his own in fights. Sure, she still beat him when the time came, but they were still pretty evenly matched.

“So, I picked up broadswords,” Zuko continued. “My father was ashamed, of course. He was extremely upset that his only son, heir to the throne, had to learn how to fight like a  _ commoner _ .”

Zuko said commoner with so much sarcasm, so much venom, that Katara was unsure of who he was angier at: Ozai, himself, or the commoners he had been compared to.

Zuko just shook his head. “I’m proud to have learned. It’s another skill I have. Being a nonbender isn’t a curse like people think it is, just look at Sokka and Suki. Neither of them bend, but they’re masters in their own right.”

“Yes, that’s a good point,” Katara agreed, nodding. 

Zuko gave her a small smile, but it slipped away just as quickly. “This place - it just brings back bad memories.”

Katara reached up, placing a hand on Zuko’s scarred cheek. He leaned into her touch, his hand finding hers and gripping it tightly against him. 

“I used to be happy, Katara,” Zuko whispered, squeezing his eyes shut. “Believe it or not, I wasn't always angry and broody.”

“I believe you,” Katara replied, feeling her heart break. 

Zuko swallowed. “I miss her. My mother. I miss being here with her. I miss building sandcastles with my cousin Lu Ten. I miss my uncle. I miss being happy, when there were no nightmares.”

Katara removed her hand from Zuko’s face before wrapping her arms around him tightly, pulling him close to her. She felt Zuko’s arms wrap around her waist and Zuko burrow his face in the crook of her neck. She thought she felt a tear, but she couldn’t be sure. 

“I’m sorry, Zuko, I’m sorry being here is doing this to you,” Katara said soothingly, stroking his hair softly. 

He shook against her with silent sobs, but he didn’t reply. 

“I’ve got you, Zuko,” she assured him. “Now you’re safe with me.”

They stayed like that a while before Zuko finally pulled away from her, wiping his eyes with his hand so she couldn’t see him. Though he was so vulnerable with her, so open with how he was feeling, he still wouldn’t let her see him cry. 

“I just want to be happy again,” Zuko admitted, not meeting her eyes. “Like, really happy. Not this fake happy, that everything will be alright.”

“What makes you happy?” she asked, placing a hand under Zuko’s chin and turning his head to look at her.

Zuko paused briefly before answering, “You do.”

“Why?” Katara asked, stroking his jaw with her thumb. 

“I don’t - I don’t know,” Zuko stammered, thought Katara knew he was lying. He was trying to protect her feelings, trying to respect her wishes of not wanting to know how he feels about her. “You just  _ do _ .”

“Then use that,” Katara said simply. “Find that happiness you feel with me and see if you can apply it elsewhere.”

“Think that will work?” he asked her, wrapping a hand around her wrist. 

“I don’t know,” Katara replied, “but it’s good to try, right?”

Zuko smiled, though it barely reached his eyes. “Yes.”

“And for the record,” Katara said, moving her hand so that she could lace her fingers through Zuko’s, “you make me happy too.”

Zuko visibly relaxed, but didn’t say anything. Instead, he ducked down, giving her a kiss on the forehead. 

* * *

Later that day, just as Katara and Aang came back from the beach after another round of training, Sokka and Suki returned from the market, their arms full of food. 

“Sokka, what’s in your hand?” Zuko asked, walking over to Sokka and prying the piece of parchment from Sokka’s hand.

“Ah! A surprise!” Sokka replied, placing the baskets on the table and beaming at Zuko. “Open it!”

Zuko looked at Katara, who just shrugged, and then unrolled the parchment, revealing a flier. 

“The Ember Island Players presents ‘The Boy in the Iceberg’,” Zuko read, his brow furrowing as he looked back up at Sokka.

“A play?” Aang asked, bounding over to Zuko and looking over his shoulder. “Oh! A play about us!”

“Yep, Sokka thinks it would ‘boost morale’,” Suki stated, wiping her hands together and shaking her hands. “He thinks we should go.”

“It’s probably full of Fire Nation propaganda,” Toph said, though she looked at Zuko after she said that. “No offense.”

“None taken,” Zuko replied, handing the flier to Aang with a look of disgust. “The Ember Island Players are the worst though, they butcher ‘Love Amongst Dragons’ every year.”

When he noticed everyone looking at him, even Toph, Zuko shrugged nonchalantly. 

“What? It’s a good story,” Zuko replied. 

“I think we should go!” Aang claimed, raising the flier above him. “Think about it! Won’t it be interesting to see our journey through someone else’s point of view?”

“That’s what I’m saying!” Sokka said, going over to Aang and throwing an arm around the Avatar’s shoulder. “Come on, guys, please!”

Katara, Zuko, and Suki all exchanged glances as Sokka and Aang practically continued begging. 

“We could use a little break,” Katara stated, shifting back and forth on her feet. 

“And it  _ would  _ be interesting,” Suki added, throwing a look at Zuko.

“Don’t ask me, I’ll follow whatever,” Zuko claimed. “Toph?”

“I won’t be able to see it anyways,” Toph stated, “but whatever.”

“Yes!” Aang and Sokka shouted in unison, high fiving excitedly. 

Though later that night, as everyone got ready, Katara knew that she was unprepared for whatever she was about to see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this ended up taking a little turn when Zuko and Katara were talking - I started thinking about how being on Ember Island definitely affected Zuko in a negative way because, as he said, the last time he was there was when his family was actually happy. So, of course he's definitely struggling, but he wouldn't say that.
> 
> As for next chapter, I'm not deep diving into Ember Island Players (aka, I'm not rewriting the whole play because it's too much), but I will be exploring some points that happen after the play (meaning I did some reorganization for a certain scene).
> 
> Again, thank you for the comments and kudos! Much love!


	19. give me a boost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! There were A LOT of elements to add to this chapter. 
> 
> 1\. Aang kissing Katara, which I moved to after the play.  
> 2\. Katara's every growing feelings for Zuko  
> 3\. The soldier's assault on Katara back in chapter 10.
> 
> I tried to add everything in, but overall, I'm happy with how this chapter turned out. I'm speeding up the next couple chapters because I want to get to the Agni Kai.

“The Boy in the Iceberg” was every bit of… well, everything that Katara knew it was going to be. 

Besides the blatant propaganda against them, the fact that everyone was casted incorrectly or totally butchered,  _ and  _ the fact that after the third act, Aang became angry with Katara for no reason, Katara overall hated the play. Not only that, but they didn’t even win! Well, Katara should have seen that coming, it  _ was  _ a play told from the point of view from the Fire Nation. Still, watching Zuko and Aang die horribly painful deaths, even in character, was too much to bear. Well, that and the fact that the Ember Island Players seem to think that she and Zuko had some sort of forbidden romance going on. 

Though to be fair...

“Some play,” Sokka said from in front of her, his arm tightly wrapped around Suki’s waist. “I would say it was good, but -”

“It was truly terrible,” Suki finished for him, shaking her head. “Wow, I can’t believe we actually watched that.”

“Listen, even though I really liked my casting,” Toph said from next to Katara, “that was still horrible.”

“Told you Ember Island Players were shit,” Zuko commented, following everyone else. 

Katara stopped to wait for him, letting Toph go on ahead of her. Though she did not miss the way Toph faltered when Katara stopped, looking back at Katara with a tiny smirk before running ahead to catch up with Sokka and Suki. 

“You doing okay?” she asked, when he finally caught up to her. “I’m sure seeing yourself up there, acting like that and -”

“No, I’m not okay,” Zuko bristled, causing Katara to wince. “Sorry, that was too harsh.”

“I get it,” she told him, placing a hand on his arm and giving him a squeeze. 

Zuko paused, giving her a small grin before turning around to look behind them. “I think Aang’s doing worse though.”

Katara looked to where Zuko was looking, spotting Aang loitering behind, kicking stones on the path as he clearly muttered to himself. The hat he was wearing to hide his tattoos had fallen slightly, looking as dejected as Aang probably felt. 

“I should probably go talk to him,” Katara muttered, letting go of Zuko and starting to make her way towards Aang. 

But before she could leave, Zuko caught her wrist and made her turn. “You don’t need to fix everyone’s problems, Katara. Just remember that.”

Katara nodded as Zuko released her. Taking a deep breath, she found her way towards Aang, stopping in front of him and holding her arm out to stop him from walking into her.

“Hey, what’s -!” he yelled, stopping once he spotted Katara. “Oh, it’s you.”

“It is,” Katara replied, putting her arm down. “I have a feeling you didn’t take the play very well.”

“What makes you think that?” Aang deadpanned, causing Katara to raise an eyebrow at him. “Sorry, I have a lot on my mind.”

“Did you want to talk about it?” Katara asked him. Katara, in a way, felt obligated to ask him, since that was what she did, isn’t it? She made Aang feel better when he was down? 

Aang looked up at her, some of the anger in his eyes slowly starting to disappear. 

“You can tell me why you’re so mad at me,” Katara continued, holding her hand out to Aang, palm out as if showing Aang she didn’t really care. 

“I’m not - I’m not mad at you,” Aang replied quickly, turning red under his hat. 

“No?” Katara asked, shaking her head at Aang. “Because you’re sure acting like it. Did I do something wrong?”

“No, no, it’s just - did you mean what you said?” Aang asked her, cocking his head to the side, staring up at Katara.

“What did I say?” Katara asked, blinking in confusion. Had she said something to Aang without realizing it?

“When you said you saw me like a little brother,” Aang clarified, turning steadily more red.

So  _ that’s  _ what got Aang so angry? Some stupid line from a play, said by a girl who wasn’t even her? 

“Aang,  _ I  _ didn’t say that,” Katara emphasized, placing a hand on Aang’s shoulder. “Some actress in a play who doesn’t even know me said that.”

“I know, but still.” Aang shook his head. “I just thought…” But he trailed off, looking away from Katara, down towards his feet.

“Thought what, Aang?” Katara asked, ducking her head slightly so she could look at Aang.

“We kissed on the day of the invasion,” Aang told her, finally making eye contact with Katara. “And, well, I thought - I thought we were going to be together.”

Katara felt all the air leave her lungs, felt herself hold back a grimace. She remembered that day; she remembered Aang flinging himself towards her, placing a small kiss on her lips before flying away on his glider. Katara remembered being extremely confused by his actions, placing a hand on her mouth in shock as she watched him glide away.

“We’re in the middle of a war, Aang,” she said, dropping her hand from Aang’s shoulder. “I - we have other things to worry about right now. It’s not the right time.”

“Is there ever going to be a right time?” Aang persisted, his eyes widening. 

“Aang, I’m sorry, it’s just - I’m a little confused right now,” Katara told him, taking a step back from Aang, one hand finding the end of a curl and pulling at it. 

Before she knew what was happening, Aang took a step forward, leaning in toward Katara and placing his lips on hers. Blinking, Katara pulled away, taking another step away from Aang in shock.

“Aang!” she exclaimed, placing a hand to her mouth. “I just said I was confused!”

“I’m sorry!” he replied, stepping away from her, his eyes wide with shock. “I just - I thought - I’m sorry!”

“You can’t do that, Aang!” Katara said, her voice rising steadily. “You can’t just kiss me and expect me to suddenly understand my feelings! That’s not fair!”

“Katara, I’m sorry!” Aang repeated, not moving from his spot, his voice pleading. “That was really stupid of me, I know it was. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“No, you shouldn’t have,” Katara snapped, crossing her arms. 

“Please, Katara,” Aang begged, but Katara just shook her head, turning on her heel about to walk away when - 

“It’s him, isn't it?” Aang’s voice rang in her ears, causing Katara to pause and turn back around to face Aang.

“Who?” Katara asked quietly, but she knew who Aang meant. 

“Don’t make me say it, Katara,” Aang replied, taking a step closer to her. When Katara didn’t move, Aang took that as a signal to continue. “I see it, Katara. The way he looks at you. The way  _ you  _ look at  _ him. _ Something happened when you guys were away, and you’re just too nice to tell me. Not only that, but it seems like the Ember Island Players know something the rest of us don’t.”

The catacombs. The way Actress Katara and Actor Zuko clung to each other. The way she felt Zuko shift away from her during that scene, feeling the heat slowly rising off of him in embarrassment. 

“Nothing happened,” Katara lied, watching Aang as he sighed. “I don’t - don’t know what you’re talking about. And it was just a stupid  _ play,  _ Aang. Nothing happened.”

“Then why are you confused, Katara?” Aang asked her, giving her a sad smile. 

“I just am, Aang, I don’t need a reason,” Katara retorted, turning her face away from Aang, lifting her chin up. 

“I’m sorry, Katara,” Aang said again. “I’ll leave you alone now. But I’m sorry for getting mad at you about the play. It’s not your fault that the actress said that. And I’m sorry for kissing you. It was stupid, and I’m sorry.”

“Aang,” Katara started, turning to look back at Aang, but he just shook her head and began walking by her. 

“It’s fine, Katara,” Aang told her when he reached her. “I’ll leave you alone.”

“Aang,” Katara repeated, but Aang was already walking away, leaving her standing there by herself, more confused than ever. 

She watched as Aang faded from view, her legs jelly when he finally disappeared from sight. Unable to move, Katara collapsed on her knees, leaning forward so that her hands were splayed out on the path in front of her. She wasn’t exactly sure what just happened, wasn’t sure if Aang actually apologized or not. 

But, oh was she confused! So confused, that she wasn’t even sure what she was confused about! There was a small part of her that was angry with Aang and how he just  _ assumed  _ that they would be together, but there was another part of her that told her to grin and bear it, be with Aang whether she wanted to or not. 

And then he had to ask about -

Well, he didn’t say, but Katara knew. How could she be so naive to think that Aang had missed how she acted around Zuko? How close they had become? The small, lingering touches they always gave each other when they thought no one was looking? And while she told Zuko she didn’t want to know about his feelings for her, did not want to know if he loved her as much as Miho said he did, there was that small part of her that  _ knew.  _

And there was that small part of her that said that she might love him too, but she just wasn’t ready yet. 

Watching the Ember Island Players, her and Zuko’s actors grasping on to each other for dear life, proclaiming their love for each other - well, it was just all too much. Especially when Zuko cleared his throat audibly as Sokka roared in laughter behind them.

And then Aang, kissing her without her consent, all of a sudden bringing up memories of Hiratao’s body pressed up against hers. Aang’s kiss had been so innocent in comparison, and yet Katara could still feel the way her wrist stung as Hiratao burned her. 

Tonight was too much, it was all too much. 

Choking on a small sob, Katara slowly got up, finding her footing once more and holding her head up high. Wiping her eye with the back of her hand, Katara made her way back to the estate, her picture perfect mask already placed over her face, ready to hide how broken she really felt. 

* * *

When the others had returned to the estate, they all promptly said good night to each other before going to their respective bedrooms. Before heading upstairs, though, Zuko paused at the foot of the stairs, looking at the front door waiting for Aang or Katara to walk through. 

After leaving Katara to go talk to Aang, Zuko couldn’t help but worry about both of them. Aang because he was the Avatar and him getting caught would be disastrous, and Katara because… well, because. 

Sighing, he made his way upstairs, passing Toph who was leaning against the wall next to her bedroom door, her foot resting on the wall next to her.

“I can feel your heartbeat,” she sang to Zuko, a smirk on her face. “It’s racing faster than Momo’s when he spots a lychee nut in his vicinity.”

“Mind your business, Toph,” Zuko said, trying to walk away, but Toph reached out and grabbed his cloak, pulling him closer to her.

“No way, Sparky, we had a beautiful moment together at the play, we’re about to have another one,” Toph stated, releasing Zuko as he groaned in response. 

“You’re incorrigible, you know that, right?” Zuko asked, leaning up against the wall next to Toph.

The small earthbender smirked in response. “I know that. Now, what’s eating you?”

“Nothing,” Zuko lied, but of course Toph could tell he was lying. Her smirk grew wider as Zuko just groaned again. “There’s a lot on my mind, that’s all.”

“With what?” Toph asked, sliding down to the floor and patting the space next to her.

Rolling his eyes, Zuko slid down too, settling down next to Toph. “Everything. Being in this house, watching that play, our possible imminent doom.”

“Well, aren’t you cheery this evening?” Toph joked. 

“Toph,” Zuko warned, about to stand up when Toph pulled him back down. 

“Sorry, sorry,” Toph replied, letting go of Zuko when he sat back down. “Anyways, you’re worried about our imminent doom?”

“I guess I just don’t know what to expect, that’s all,” Zuko admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “Seeing myself on stage like that? It was just a lot to take in. One, because I was an absolute asshole for most of my life and I treated everyone I care about now like shit. And, because I know that my father would - would kill me if had the chance. He’s tried twice before this.”

Toph sucked in a breath. “I - I didn’t know that.”

“Not something I tend to share,” Zuko told her. “But, yes. The first time I was about ten. He was willing to kill me to prove a point to my grandfather. The second time was a few months ago, during the invasion. I went to confront him and he didn’t hold back.”

“Shit, Sparky, I had no idea,” Toph replied quietly, her eyes wide as she looked up at Zuko without seeing. 

“Toph, why would you know?” Zuko asked her, sighing. “I’m sorry to dump this on you, that’s not fair. I usually tell - I usually tell no one.”

“No, you usually tell Katara,” Toph corrected for him. “Or you’ve started to tell Katara everything, at least.”

“She listens,” Zuko said, feeling his heart flutter. 

“Hmm,” Toph hummed. “I know she does. You trust each other.”

“Yes.” Zuko trusted Katara above all else. There was really no one he trusted more, besides Uncle Iroh. 

“Well, I have a feeling she’s going to need you right now,” Toph replied, standing up and placing her hand on the doorknob. 

“Why?” Zuko asked, looking up at her, brows furrowed. 

Just then, he heard a creak on the stairs and looked to see Katara slowly making her way up, her face unreadable. 

“Oh, hi,” she said, looking back and forth between Zuko on the floor and Toph at the door. “I - I assumed - did Aang come back?”

Toph shook her head. “Not that I heard, why?”

“He went on without me,” Katara explained, her voice oddly tight. “Just wanted to be sure.”

Toph frowned. “He might be with Appa. I can go look.”

“Yes, please,” Katara replied, nodding.

As Toph walked away, she paused at Katara, placing a hand on the older girl’s shoulder before walking away without saying anything else.

Zuko still sat on the floor, staring up at Katara. Though Katara looked strong, her head held high, her posture straight, Zuko could see her breaking. 

Slowly he stood up and walked over to her, placing his hands on her upper arms. She looked up at him, her lip quivering just enough for him to know. 

“Come on,” he told her, leading her down the hall towards his room. 

He opened the door for her, ushering her inside before walking in himself and closing the door behind them. As soon as he turned around, Katara flung herself into him, wrapping her arms tightly around his torso, burying her face in his chest as she finally broke. In response, Zuko held her close to him, placing a small kiss on her hair before resting his chin on top of her head. 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she sobbed into him. “I don’t want to, don’t make me.”

“We don’t have to talk about it then,” Zuko assured her. “If you want to just cry, then go ahead and cry. I won’t stop you.”

So Katara cried. And Zuko did what he always did: held her while she put herself back together. 

When she was finally all cried out, cheeks puffy and chest heaving, Zuko pushed her away from him just enough to see her eyes.

“You’re with me, Katara,” he told her, stroking her cheek with the back of his hand. “For everything.”

“I know,” she sniffed, leaning into Zuko’s touch. “And that’s why everything is so much.”

“Okay,” Zuko replied.

Katara sniffed again, pulling herself away from Zuko and standing in front of him, wringing her hands together. 

“Are you okay?” he asked her, studying her as she took a shaky breath.

“No,” she admitted. “Are you?”

“No,” he replied. “But we will be.”

Katara nodded. “Yes.”

“Katara,” Zuko said, taking another step towards her. “I - I don’t want to spend the night alone again. The - the nightmares.”

“Me too,” she said softly. 

“Will you stay?” Zuko asked, grabbing her hand. “Just for tonight?”

“Just for tonight,” Katara agreed, letting Zuko lead her towards his bed. 

Zuko let go of her hand and watched as she crawled into the bed, settling deep underneath the sheets even though she was still dressed in her day clothes. She watched as Zuko undid his cloak and threw it to the side before pulling off his shirt. 

As soon as he slid into the bed, Katara curled up into him, throwing an arm over his stomach, holding him tightly. 

“Just for tonight,” she whispered, her eyes fluttering closed. 

“Just for tonight,” Zuko repeated, placing his hand on top of her arm. 

He listened as her breathing slowed down, deep and even. His opposite hand played with the ends of her hair as he stared up at the ceiling, trying not to let everything overwhelm him. 

Zuko thought of that stupid play, the way it portrayed him and Katara as some love sick idiots who clung to each other in the catacombs. He remembered feeling Katara go rigid next to him, side eyeing him just enough so that he cleared his throat and moved away from her to give her space. Sokka thought the whole ordeal was hilarious, bursting out laughing, smacking his knee as he pointed on stage. Suki had clicked her tongue and smacked Sokka to calm him down, but Zuko did his best to ignore him. He felt himself to go hot, doing his best to avoid looking over at Katara when the scene  _ finally  _ ended. 

So badly did he want to tell her how he felt, but he respected her too much to disregard her wishes. She was his best friend, and how does one tell his best friend that he loves her? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The line about telling his best friend he loves her... extremely inspired by my other favorite show New Girl.


	20. setting fire to the sky

The comet was now five days away and Team Avatar worked harder than ever. There was a brief moment when they toyed with the idea of waiting until after the comet for Aang to face the Fire Lord, but that idea was quickly squashed when Zuko informed the rest of the team of Ozai’s plan to watch the world burn. 

Sokka put it upon himself to create a training regime, one that the others could run through as if actually in battle. Overall, Sokka’s idea was actually pretty well put together: Sokka and Suki made one team, Katara and Zuko another, and Toph pretended to be a Fire Nation soldier. All Aang had to do was take out the Melon Lord. Yet when the time came, Aang hesitated. 

“Aang, what are you doing? Take him out!” Sokka called out to him, making his way to the Avatar. 

“I can’t do it, Sokka, it’s not right,” Aang replied, shaking his head, moving his glider away from Melon Lord’s head and leaning it up against his shoulder.

Sokka took one hard look at Aang before unsheathing his sword and swinging, cutting the melon that stood in as Ozai’s head in half. 

“There, it’s done,” Sokka snapped, sheathing his sword again and walking away without looking at Aang. Aang just closed his eyes.

“That was harsh, Sokka,” Katara chastised as Sokka walked by her. “You could have been a little bit nicer.”

Sokka shook his head. “There is no time for being nice, Katara. He knows what he needs to do.”

“Still,” Katara stated, looking over at Zuko. “He’s just confused.”

“I know,” Zuko said with a small shrug. 

They watched as Aang stalked away, not looking at anyone as he made his way back to the estate. 

“I say we should go talk to him,” Toph said, crossing her arms, “but he won’t listen. Let him cool off for a bit before we say anything.”

“He knows we’re not mad at him, right?” Suki asked, watching after Aang. “We just need him to realize what’s at stake.”

“Well, if you guys find a way to get through his head that he needs to take action, then let me know,” Sokka replied, looking at Zuko just like his sister did. “And no offense, Zuko, but your dad needs to go down.”

“I’m not offended, I agree,” Zuko told him, putting his hands up. “If anyone knows that my dad needs to be defeated, trust me, it’s me.”

“Come on,” Suki said, grabbing Sokka’s hand. “Let’s take a walk. I think you need it.”

Sokka muttered under his breath, but followed Suki’s lead, leaving Toph, Zuko, and Katara alone. 

“I miss when the comet wasn’t so close,” Toph lamented, sighing deeply. “I miss when we were able to just train and hang out. It feels like this storm cloud hanging over our heads.”

Zuko and Katara exchanged a knowing look. 

“Whatever,” Toph huffed. “I’m going to find something entertaining. I don’t feel like being around love birds right now.”

“Wait woah!” Zuko exclaimed loudly.

“Hey, we’re not - !” Katara stated, shaking her head.

Toph held a hand up. “Hey, whatever. I don’t know what’s going on here, but the heart doesn’t lie. Have fun.”

With that, Toph walked away, giving Katara and Zuko a small wave. Katara just sighed, placing her hand on her face, unable to look at Zuko. Zuko, on the other hand, rolled his eyes.

“She’s just teasing,” Zuko assured her, “don’t worry.”

“Yes, I know,” Katara replied.

A beat. 

“Aang’s still mad at me,” Katara told Zuko, wrapping her arms around herself. “He pretends that everything is okay when we’re training, but sometimes I spot him looking at me sadly, as if I disappointed him.”

“Why is Aang mad at you?” Zuko asked, frowning slightly. “I thought you guys talked about what happened? I thought he apologized for what he said to you about Yon Rha?”

Katara shook her head. After breaking down to Zuko the night of the play, Katara never told Zuko what she and Aang had talked about. Instead, when they woke up the next morning, Katara watched as Zuko got ready to train with Aang, neither one speaking a word. 

And though they told themselves that Katara spending the night with Zuko would only happen once, Katara found herself slipping into Zuko’s room late at night when everyone else was asleep. 

Maybe Ember Island Players  _ had  _ gotten something right. 

Katara shook her head from these thoughts, bringing her back to the present. “We talked about the play the other night. I thought he was upset about - about the end of the play. But that wasn’t what bothered him. Not completely, I mean.”

Zuko took a step towards Katara. “What upset him then?”

All Katara had to do was look up at him and motion at the little space between them for Zuko to understand.

“Ah, I see,” Zuko replied, running his hand through his hair. “He didn’t like the catacomb scene just as much as we did, huh?”

“No, not at all,” Katara told him, letting out a small breath. “He didn’t like how I apparently see him as a little brother.”

“You didn’t say that though,” Zuko answered, raising his eyebrow at her. “So, he’s mad about what happened in a play? No, wait, he’s mad at  _ you  _ for what happened in a play?”

“Silly, I know,” Katara stated, shaking her head. “And then he - he asked why we weren’t together because he kissed me at the invasion, and I told him I was confused and - and…”

“Katara, please,” Zuko said, placing his hands on her shoulders. “You don’t need to tell me everything.”

“Zuko, he  _ kissed  _ me,” Katara spat out angrily, causing Zuko to wince at her tone. “He kissed me when we were talking because he thought - he thought  _ kissing  _ me would make me suddenly feel the same way about him!”

“Katara -”

“And do you want to know the worst part?” Katara continued, stubborn tears already welling up in her eyes. “As soon as Aang walked away, I remembered what  _ he  _ did to me. Or what he almost did to me. I just thought of Hiratao’s hands all over me, and I feel so stupid!”

“Katara!” Zuko repeated, grabbing her hands and holding them tightly. “You’re not stupid for feeling this way. Nor are you stupid for remembering what happened on Gangjin. This triggered you, and it’s completely normal for you to feel overwhelmed.” 

“I thought that once we returned to Ember Island, everything would go back to normal,” Katara cried, feeling her shoulder slacken. “I was stupid to think that.”

“No, you’re not,” Zuko assured her, hands still tightly wrapped around hers. “Please, Katara, you’re not stupid.”

“I should have told you all this sooner,” Katara stated, pulling her hands away from Zuko’s and taking a step back from him. “I’m sorry, I don’t know why I didn’t.”

“Because you weren’t ready to talk about it,” Zuko replied. “And I wasn’t going to push you to talk about something you weren’t ready to face.”

“We all have demons, don’t we?” Katara quipped, rubbing her left wrist, trying to ignore the fact that it felt like it was burning.

“That we do,” Zuko agreed, taking a step towards her and placing a hand on her cheek. “That we do.”

Katara looked up at him, feeling herself blush. She let go of her wrist and closed her eyes, leaning into Zuko’s touch. In a way, she would have stood there forever with him if she had the chance, but she knew that was not possible. 

Instead, she let Zuko take her by the hand and lead her back towards the estate, changing the subject to talk about his uncle and his time in Ba Sing Se. And while she knew that Zuko discussing all of the events were opening up old wounds, scars not yet healed, Katara appreciated that he took her pain away in the best way he could. 

* * *

Later that day, just as the sun was beginning to set, Sokka and Suki were left making dinner for everyone else. Zuko went out to the courtyard to meditate, Toph went to go find Aang, and Katara found herself with nothing to do. Bored, she decided to investigate the attic, climbing up the ominous stairs that Zuko told the rest of the crew were probably haunted by Fire Lord’s past. Katara smiled at the memory of Zuko sitting by the fire, his face lit up as he lowered his voice, telling ghost stories that really only caused Sokka to jump. 

Carefully, Katara made her way into the attic, noting the thick layer of dust on the floor, the cobwebs on the ceiling, the smell of must and mold penetrating her nostrils. Scrunching her nose, Katara fully entered the room, feeling the crunch of dust beneath her feet. Coughing, she went to the window and opened it wide, letting some of the moonlight into the room. At one point, a dust cloud found its way to her face, causing her to sneeze. 

“Bless you!” someone called from outside, probably Toph. 

“Thanks,” Katara called back, stifling a laugh.

She turned back around, glancing around the room to see if anything caught her eye. Her eyes fell on a small wooden cabinet, multiple scrolls shoved in together haphazardly. Curious, she went over and tugged at one, using her opposite hand to keep the rest steady. When she was sure no others would fall, Katara carefully opened the scroll, noting the yellowing page and small tears around the edge. Once it was fully opened, Katara couldn’t help but laugh; on the page, a small boy, smiling through the parchment with his hands out, tiny baby hairs poking out of his topknot. Was this Zuko, she wondered. 

Deciding this was enough treasure for today, Katara rushed back downstairs, listening to her friends as they trudged into the courtyard, clearly getting ready for dinner. 

“Look what I found!” Katara exclaimed, holding up her treasure in her hand in triumph as the others passed bowls to each other.

“A scroll?” Sokka asked, handing a bowl to Toph.

Katara noted that Aang sat away from the others, his face in his hands. 

“Well, yes, but it’s what’s on the scroll.” With that, Katara reopened the scroll with a flourish, holding the painting out everyone to see. Suki started to giggle as Sokka studied the painting, finger on his chin. “Aw, baby Zuko! So cute!”

“Sorry to ruin your fun, Katara, but, uh, that’s not me,” Zuko said slowly, giving Katara a grimace. “It’s - well, that’s my father.”

Sokka blanched and Toph choked on the noodle she was eating. Katara felt her eyes widen as she looked back at the painting, finally noticing the differences between Zuko and Ozai. 

“I - I never realized,” Katara stammered, giving Zuko an apologetic look. Zuko shrugged her off and began eating. 

“He looks so innocent,” Suki stated as Katara rolled the scroll back up and tossed it to the side. 

“Doesn’t that just prove my point?” Aang had walked over, arms crossed as he addressed the rest of the group. 

“What point, Aang?” Katara sighed, giving him her attention. 

Sokka pointedly continued eating his food, but kept his eyes glued to Aang. 

“That the Fire Lord is human,” Aang insisted, raising his hands up. “That there is another way to stop him without actually killing him!”

“No offense, Aang, but your logic doesn’t exactly check out,” Toph said, playing with her food. “I get what you mean, but it doesn’t work.”

“But he’s still a living being!” Aang persisted, now looking at Zuko, his eyes hard. “He’s your father, don’t you have anything to say about this?”

Zuko looked up from his food, his hair in his face as he considered Aang, his lips a straight line. 

“Anything?” Aang repeated, his voice rising ever so slightly at Zuko’s look of contempt.

“You’re asking me whether or not I agree on whether my father should die or not?” Zuko clarified, placing his bowl down and squinting at Aang. “That’s what you're asking me?”

Aang nodded slowly, though Katara could sense he regretted asking Zuko anything.

“Aang, I’m going to tell you something about Ozai,” Zuko stated, leaning forward on his elbows to get a better look at Aang. “I’m going to tell you about the man who raised me, about the man that  _ you  _ need to face. If it changes your mind, fine. If not, then don’t tell me. Ultimately it’s your choice.”

Aang swallowed. “Okay.”

Sokka, Suki, and Toph all moved toward Zuko, ready to listen. Katara sat on the ground by Zuko’s feet, looking up at him as his face set with determination. 

“Have you ever wondered what kind of person Ozai is?” Zuko asked, still glaring at Aang. “Not just as a warmonger, or someone who wants to rule the world. Not as the man who caused so many deaths in so little time. I mean as an actual  _ person,  _ someone who had relationships with other people.”

Zuko paused as Aang shook his head.

“For one, he pretty much stole the crown from my uncle,” Zuko explained. “When my cousin died, Ozai went to my grandfather to ask for the crown. Uncle had no heirs and no ambition to fight this war anymore, so Ozai decided he would be the next best thing. For presenting such a treacherous idea, my grandfather said that Ozai never experienced losing a son, and in order to understand his brother’s pain, he must kill his first born son to understand how deeply Iroh hurt. Want to know the best part? If it weren’t for my mother, I would be dead.”

Aang’s eyes went wide as the others all shuddered. This was one part of Zuko’s past that Katara never knew and she resisted the urge to reach out to him. 

“Three years later, my father burned me.” Zuko motioned to his scar. “All because I spoke out of turn. His own son. Burned, banished, stripped of his title and birthright. At the age of thirteen.”

“I - I didn’t -” Aang stammered, taking a step back.

“And even though my sister might be totally crazy,” Zuko continued, “he hurt her just as much as he hurt me. Maybe not physically, but mentally. That’s his influence, Aang. He hurts the people closest to him to get what he wants. There is no love in Ozai, no care about others. I don’t even think he loved my mother. Maybe he did, but he had a funny way of showing it. So, you want my opinion, Aang? He can burn just like I did for all I care.”

“Zuko, that’s - that’s a lot,” Sokka sighed, his bowl officially far away from him as he took in Zuko’s story. 

“But he’s still a person,” Aang said quietly. “He’s a living and breathing person, and it just doesn’t feel right.”

“Even after all that bullshit you just heard?” Toph asked, shaking her head at Aang. “You still don’t see -”

“No, I see perfectly clear!” Aang retorted. “I understand that Ozai is an awful, terrible person, but he’s still human!”

“Aang, you need to understand -” Katara started, when Aang made a sharp movement with his head, looking away from everyone else.

“No! I don’t!” Aang yelled, throwing his hands up. “You all have no idea what I’m going through!”

“We’re trying to understand!” Katara yelled back, standing up and glaring at him. “Let us help you!”

Aang looked over at Katara, his eyes narrowed at her. “Maybe I’m just not as comfortable with killing as you are,” he said coolly. 

“Woah!” Sokka exclaimed, standing up as well, grabbing Katara’s upper arm to stop her from flinging herself at Aang. 

“What’s that supposed to mean!?” Katara screeched at Aang, Toph and Suki frozen in place, Zuko staring at Katara with wide eyes.

“It means that you might be a killer, but I’m not! So unless you all figure out a way for me to defeat the Fire Lord without killing him, let me know!” Aang exclaimed, turning on his heel and stomping away.

Katara shook her arm out of Sokka’s grasp, starting to follow Aang. “Oh, no! You don’t get to run away from this!”

Before she could get far, she felt a hand fall on her shoulder, tugging her back. She turned her head, spotting Zuko who just looked beyond her, watching Aang.

“Let him go,” Zuko advised her. “He needs time to figure this out on his own.”

“After what he said to me?” Katara hissed, watching Aang disappear from view. 

“Katara, let him walk away,” Zuko said calmly, his grip tightening on her shoulder. “Let it end here.”

Katara let out an angry breath, shaking Zuko’s hand off of her shoulder. Without saying anything, without even having dinner, Katara walked away back into the estate, leaving the others behind her. 

“That was low, even for Aang,” Toph said quietly, shaking her head. “He didn’t need to say that to her. He didn’t need to dump his issues on Katara like that.”

“No, he doesn’t,” Sokka agreed, looking after his sister and sighing. “But she also needs to accept her actions.”

“She has accepted them, Sokka,” Zuko said forcefully, picking up his bowl. “She’s just trying to live with how others are seeing her right now.”

Sokka squinted at Zuko, watching as the older boy picked up Katara’s and Aang’s untouched bowls of food. Without saying anything, Suki placed a hand on Sokka’s back. 

“We should probably clean up and get some rest,” Suki said gently. “If we plan on trying to head out tomorrow, we need to be well rested.”

The others nodded without saying anything, grabbing their dinner and going inside, depositing everything into the basin to be washed without much thought. Aang was still gone, and Katara was probably in her room, but everyone silently agreed to let them stew.

Still, when he went upstairs, Zuko paused in front of Katara’s room, standing outside the door listening in. He couldn’t hear anything going on, but he could only assume that she was fuming inside.

“Let her be, buddy,” came Sokka’s voice from behind him. “She’ll probably find you when she’s ready.”

“She could look for you,” Zuko stated, turning to face him. “You are her brother.”

Sokka shrugged. “Maybe so, but it seems to me like she looks to you for comfort now. You care about her and she sees that.”

Zuko glanced back at the door then back at Sokka. “Caring for her is an understatement, I think.”

“Yeah, I know,” Sokka replied, giving Zuko a small grin. “She’s my sister, I notice everything. The biggest change I’ve noticed in her is how much she cares for and relies on you. And I know that you have her back through everything.”

Zuko swallowed. “I won’t turn my back on her again, I promise.”

“I know,” Sokka nodded. “Does she know?”

“Know what?” Zuko asked. 

“How you feel,” Sokka clarified, motioning towards Katara’s door. “That you love her.”

Zuko let out a hollow laugh. “Am I that obvious that everyone figured it out before me?”

“Looks like it,” Sokka grinned, patting Zuko on the shoulder. “So, I know, but does she?”

“No,” Zuko sighed. “Well, I think she knows, but I never told her. Never said those words out loud.”

“Why?” Sokka questioned, tilting his head to the side. 

“Because she’s going through a lot and she doesn’t want to know,” Zuko answered. “She’s not ready to face her feelings, and honestly, neither am I. We both like this friendship we built, and I don’t want to tear it down all because I - I - we’re not ready.”

“Love is war, if you think about,” Sokka mused with a small shrug. “But I get it, I do. But she’s my sister, and if you hurt her -”

“You beat the shit out of me,” Zuko finished, grinning at Sokka. “Yeah, I know.”

Sokka gave Zuko one last clap on the shoulder. “There you go, buddy. Now, if we win, I need you to promise me something, okay?”

Zuko blinked. “If?”

“Please, just hear me out,” Sokka said, eyes narrowing, voice serious. 

Zuko motioned for Sokka to continue. 

“Take care of her,” Sokka stated. “If something happens to me, take care of her.”

“Nothing will happen to you, Sokka,” Zuko said earnestly. 

“Zuko, please.” Sokka’s voice broke, but only enough for Zuko to sigh deeply and nod. “Thank you.”

“Go to bed, Sokka,” Zuko said. “Go spend the night with Suki, pretend that everything is normal. We’ll figure out the rest tomorrow.”

Sokka nodded, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked up at Zuko. “Thanks, buddy.”

Zuko just nodded in return before turning away from Sokka and heading towards his own room. Deep in his gut he knew that tonight was going to be different. Tonight was more important than ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm trying to get to the Agni Kai as quickly as I can. Now, I've written chapter 21, but I'm not totally happy with it, so I need another few days to work through it. 
> 
> Once we're reunited with the White Lotus, the rest of the journey will focus on Katara and Zuko, so be ready for that!


	21. hearts and wrists intact

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, this chapter was going to go a different, albeit smuttier, direction for Katara and Zuko. But then I wrote the whole scene and the morning after, reread what I had, and absolutely hated everything I wrote. So, I scrapped the whole thing and wrote what's here instead. I had Zuko and Katara talk just a bit more, because honestly, having them do more just didn't really feel all that right because neither of will say how they feel out loud, and it would open way too many more elements of the story that I didn't really want to get into. If that makes sense? 
> 
> Thanks again to @lumosflies for being the best beta and reading this chapter for me! Oh, and for always letting me scream to you about this fic. 
> 
> Also, yes, I took this chapter title from another previous Zutara fic I wrote. What about it?

Zuko laid in bed, one hand tucked behind his head, the other resting in on his stomach. He stared up at the ceiling, trying to steady his mind from the thoughts rushing through his head.

First, there was Aang - his reaction towards Zuko’s story, the way he still wasn’t sure about killing Ozai. Of course, Zuko should have expected this; he had hoped that Aang might change his mind once he heard what Zuko said, but he wasn’t surprised. 

Second, there were his ever lingering feelings towards Katara. In a way, he was glad that Sokka had said something to him, even if Zuko himself never said his feelings out loud. Some day he’ll tell her, when she’s ready to listen to him that is.

A soft knock came at the door, causing Zuko to wake from his stupor. Sighing, he got out of bed and went to the door, pausing briefly before opening it. He knew who would be there, but still, he waited.

With a deep breath, he opened the door to find Katara standing there, her hair down and wavy. She gave him a shy smile, wringing her hands together as she focused on his face, clearly trying not to stare at his bare chest. Without saying anything, Zuko opened the door wider, standing aside to let Katara inside. Slowly, she stepped in but stopped a few feet away, turning towards Zuko.

Zuko closed the door and made his way towards his bed, placing a comforting hand on Katara’s shoulder as he walked by her towards his bed. When he sat, Katara faced him, still fiddling with her hands.

“Tough day,” Zuko said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Yes,” Katara agreed, taking a step towards Zuko, still standing in front of him. 

Zuko’s mouth went dry as he stared at Katara, trying to figure out what to say, but Katara seemed to have rehearsed. 

“I’m not mad anymore,” she told him gently, finally letting her hands fall to her sides. “At Aang, I guess. I understand what he means about - about killing.”

“What do you mean?” Zuko asked her, trying to resist the urge to reach out to her and pull her close to him. 

“I mean Aang’s right,” Katara clarified. “His upbringing and his morals are different from mine. And - well - maybe he’s not as comfortable with killing as I am. I never saw Yon Rha as human, he was always a monster in my eyes.”

“Katara, you’re allowed to be angry about what Aang said to you,” Zuko told her. “You don’t have to forgive -”

“I don’t forgive him,” Katara interrupted. “Well, not just yet. But I see where he’s coming from. I don’t think - well, I don’t know if I would have his strength.”

“You, Katara, are still one of the kindest and most compassionate people I know,” Zuko stated, finally reaching out to Katara and grabbing her wrist, pulling him closer to her so that she stood between his legs. “You have the strength to make hard decisions, and just because you chose to kill, doesn’t make you any less compassionate. Do you understand me?”

Katara nodded, eyes widening. “You really think that?”

“Really and truly,” Zuko said, resting his hands on Katara’s hips. “And I’ve thought that for a while now, so I’m not just making this all up to make you feel better. I mean, yes I’m saying it to make you feel better, but -”

Katara’s laugh cut him off as she placed both hands on his face, forcing him to look up at her fully. “Well, that made me feel better for sure, but your babbling is really what’s working.”

“Well, it’s a good thing I’m always babbling in front you,” Zuko teased, grinning up at her. 

“Why do you do that?” she asked him, pressing her forehead to his. 

“Do what?” he replied softly, closing his eyes as her thumb stroked his scarred cheek. 

“Just  _ that,”  _ Katara emphasized. “Say exactly what I need to hear. Make my heart beat so fast that I can hardly breathe. It’s hardly fair.”

“I can stop,” Zuko replied, hands gripping Katara’s waist as he opened his eyes again. 

Katara pulled her head away from him, hands still on either side of his face as she studied him, her eyes dropping to his lips thoughtfully.

“I can stop,” he repeated, his own heartbeat picking up pace as Katara just gave him a sly grin.

“What if I don’t want you to stop,” she retorted, tilting his face towards her. 

“Then I won’t,” Zuko answered slowly, just before Katara leaned forward, gently placing her lips on his.

He felt his heart burst before deepening the kiss, feeling her hands slowly make their way to his hair. There was something intoxicating about her, something that always brought him back to her even when he tried so hard to fight his feelings.

But Zuko loved her, loved her so fiercely that he could not imagine his life without her. The thought of her possibly rejecting him lingered in the back of his mind, an incessant voice that often reminded him of the way he betrayed her.

Yet it was  _ Katara  _ who was kissing  _ Zuko,  _ sweeping him in like a wave along the shore. He wasn’t sure how far she would take him, but Zuko knew he would do anything for her. Even if he could not say the words out loud, he would show her with his actions just how much he loved her.

Maybe, just maybe, there was a small possibility that she loved him as well?

When she finally pulled away, her fingers still tangled in his hair, Zuko did his best not to whimper as her lips left his. He tried to ignore the heat rising to his cheeks as she studied him, her eyes longing. 

“I don’t want to stop,” she told him, “but I also don’t want to keep going.”

Zuko swallowed. “Okay.”

“I’m scared of doing something we might regret,” she admitted, one of her hands stroking his hair gently. “I’m scared of hurting myself, of hurting  _ you _ . I don’t want to be selfish anymore.”

“You can be as selfish as you want to be, Katara,” Zuko told her, moving a hand to her cheek and cupping it lightly, his thumb stroking just under her eye. “I don’t mind.”

Katara let out a hollow laugh. “Yes, but I do. I don’t want to use you because I’m lonely and broken. That’s not fair to you.”

“You’re not the only one who’s broken, Katara,” Zuko murmured, pulling her in for another chaste kiss. 

If she pulled away, if she smacked him and told her to leave her alone, he would let her. He would let her walk away.

Instead, she kissed him back, soft and timid, her eyes drooping closed at his touch, her arms wrapping around his neck as she held him tightly. 

When he finally pulled away, he rested his forehead against hers once more, “The only thing I regret, Katara, is hurting you because I was too cowardly to choose the right path earlier.”

“You’re not a coward, Zuko,” she replied gently. “You never were.”

“No?” he asked, leaning away from her so he could stare into her eyes. “Because I feel like one right now, if I’m being honest.”

“You’re being a coward for being chivalrous?” she asked, her question teasing. 

“Maybe,” Zuko answered. “But we could all die in a few days and I can’t even figure out whether or not I actually want Aang to kill the man who burned me.” 

Katara sighed. “That’s what makes you human, Zuko, and with the comet approaching, life feels too short to live with regrets.”

“Do you have any regrets?” he asked her, placing his hands on the mattress behind him and leaning back, Katara’s hands still resting on Zuko’s shoulders.

“A few,” Katara replied honestly, a light flush on her cheeks. “But if anyone’s the coward, it’s me. I can’t even confront my own feelings about - about everything.”

“Maybe we can confront them together?” Zuko offered. 

“Only if the world doesn’t burn around us first,” Katara stated seriously. “Because I’m so scared that once I’m finally happy, finally secure, the world is going to end and fate is going to take away everything I love.”

Zuko held up his hand to her, pinky out just like he did at Miho’s those weeks ago. “If the world doesn’t burn, then?”

Katara let out a small laugh, wrapping her pinky around his. “It’s a promise.”

“Will you stay the night?” Zuko asked, their pinkies still wrapped around the other’s. “One last night before we face the end of the world together?”

“Anything for you,” Katara replied, placing a small kiss on Zuko’s scarred cheek. 

Like every night before this one, Katara curled up into Zuko, his arms wrapped around her protectively as if to shelter her from the night surrounding them. 

Who knew when Zuko would be able to hold Katara close to him like this again? So together, they laid awake, waiting for the end of the world.

* * *

For the first time since she joined Team Avatar, Toph was the first one awake the next morning. Anxiety gripped at her heart, which was a new feeling that she never experienced. Sure, Toph had gotten scared before, but usually she was able to get over her fear quickly and face her adversary head on without much thought. 

But this feeling was different. Like she told Zuko and Katara the day before, she felt a rain cloud looming overhead, waiting to break at any minute. There was too much pressure, too much tension surrounding their small group, and Toph felt like she might explode from it all at any minute. 

Unable to sleep much longer, she pushed her blankets aside and got out of bed, stomping towards the door and opening it to the hallway. Toph wasn’t really sure what she was looking for, maybe some reassurance that today was certainly not the last day of her life, but she made her way towards Zuko’s room in hopes that maybe, just maybe, he might calm her down.

Since he joined, Toph had taken a liking to Zuko, quickly adopting him as the older brother she never had. She enjoyed his comforting silence just as much as she enjoyed teasing him about how awkward he was. Zuko took it upon himself to watch over her, even though Toph didn’t  _ need  _ protection, but she was still touched whenever he would make sure nothing stood in her way when she walked or when he would describe the scenery spanned out in front of them for her to enjoy too. 

As she approached his room, she lifted her hand to the door, debating on knocking and waking him up. Since the house was made of wood, Toph couldn’t pick up on many vibrations or heartbeats in the surrounding area; honestly, she was somewhat thankful for that because she knew for a fact Sokka and Suki were having a little too much fun every night. 

Shrugging, Toph pounded on the door. “Sparky! Sparky, wakey wakey!”

She heard him muttering on the other side of the door, a vague “hold on!” as she rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet. The door opened in front of her, Zuko on the other side. Since he was standing close to her, she could sense his heartbeat, a steady rhythm before her.

“Toph? Are you okay?” he asked her, his voice full of worry. 

“What makes you think I’m not?” Toph challenged, crossing her arms in front of her and sticking her chin in the air. 

“Because you’re not usually up this early,” he answered. 

Toph dropped her arms to her side. “I guess I’m just worried, that’s all. I woke up and couldn’t fall back asleep and I just wanted to be sure that everyone was still here, that’s all.”

“I’m still here, Toph,” Zuko assured her, his hand falling on her shoulder. “Don’t worry.”

Toph was about to answer when she heard rustling in the room behind Zuko. She felt Zuko’s heartbeat speed up as she listened, picking up on Katara’s breathing behind him. Biting her tongue, Toph raised her eyebrows at Zuko.

“Hi, Katara,” Toph called out, feeling Zuko wince.

“Hi, Toph,” came Katara’s embarrassed reply. 

There was nothing different about Katara’s tone, nothing that suggested that there was more to Katara and Zuko’s night together. If anything, it seemed that they were just embarrassed to have been caught. 

“Nothing happened,” Zuko said quickly, removing his hand from Toph’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I know,” Toph smirked, listening as Katara approached them at the door. “I can feel your heartbeats, so don’t worry.” 

“Is there something else you wanted, Toph?” Zuko asked her, sounding somewhat pained. 

“Anything we can help with?” Katara offered. 

Toph blinked up at them both. If anything, she knew she could be honest with them about how she was pretty sure her anxiety was eating her from the inside out, completely ready to overtake her at any minute. Though she hated showing any sign of weakness, in front of her stood two of the strongest people she knew all because they knew when to admit when they were feeling weak. 

“Do you guys think we could all get something to eat?” Toph asked softly, feeling her cheeks flush. “Just relax before we move on? I want to pretend this morning is normal and not the start of the end of the world.”

Katara’s cool hand grasped hers. “Yeah, Toph. We can do that. Let’s get ready and then we can head down, okay?”

Toph nodded, feeling tears well up in her eyes. She wiped them away stubbornly as Katara let go of her.

Once they were all dressed, Toph, Katara, and Zuko sat in the kitchen eating, pretending like everything in the world was normal. 

And Toph couldn’t be more thankful. 

* * *

Sokka was up before Suki, already pacing around the room packing up their belongings as Suki slept fitfully in bed. While Suki slept somewhat soundly the night before, Sokka laid awake all night, staring up at the ceiling and holding the girl next to him tightly. He was so afraid of what might happen next, so afraid of what he could possibly lose. 

So long ago he lost his mother, and the pain of losing her never quite went away. Then, one right after the other, Sokka almost lost his father and his sister. Though they were both fine now, both alive and well, Sokka prayed to whatever spirit out there that he wouldn’t almost lose them again. 

Then, of course, there was Suki. Sokka was sure he loved her more than anything else in the world. Every night, when he closed his eyes, he dreamt of her and their future together. If something happened to her… Sokka didn’t even want to think about it. 

There were Aang and Toph, two of the most powerful benders he’d ever met and yet he would protect fiercely. There was Zuko, the guy who started off as his enemy only to become one of his best friends. 

Sokka was faced with the very real possibility that he might die in the next couple of days, and while that absolutely terrified him, he tried not to let the fear engulf him. For Sokka was strong. He was the one who held the group together even when he himself was falling apart.

“Sokka?” 

When he turned to face her, Suki was sitting up in bed watching him pace. 

“How long have you been up?” she asked him, leaning on her hand. 

“I don’t know,” Sokka replied, running a hand down his face. “An hour, maybe? I’m just getting everything ready. We have to head out today.”

“I know,” Suki replied gently, sliding out of bed and walking over to him. “Can you take a deep breath for me?”

Sokka did as he was told, taking a deep breath in, slowly releasing it as Suki placed a soothing hand on his arm. 

“We’re going to be okay,” she assured him, squeezing his arm. “I know it.”

“I believe you,” he replied, pulling her into him again and holding her tightly. He buried his face in the crook of her neck. “I believe you.”

* * *

A mere few hours later, everything was packed and stored on Appa, everyone buzzing with excitement and fear. 

Though just as they were all about to climb up into the saddle, Toph stopped them all.

“Hey guys,” Toph said suddenly, holding a hand up and listening. “Where’s Aang?”

Miles away from everyone else, Aang woke up sprawled on his back with Momo sitting on top of his chest and licking his face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm v excited for chapter 22 because a certain character decided we weren't done with them yet.


End file.
